


Black Beauty

by supremeleader



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Kidnapping, Masturbation, NSFW, Post TLJ, Princess!Reader, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Smut, Soulmates, Supreme Leader!Kylo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-30
Updated: 2018-12-29
Packaged: 2019-05-31 08:01:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 35
Words: 82,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15115148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supremeleader/pseuds/supremeleader
Summary: The King and Queen of Calidum have married you off to the Supreme Leader of the First Order to protect their people. Although fearful, you use what little hope you have try your best to survive through the newfound predicament you're in... only to find out the Force has more in store for you and Kylo Ren.





	1. Supreme

**Calidum** was a temperate, warm planet in the mid rim, that blossomed with green. Trees towered as mountains were coated with all sorts of plant-life and forests. With hot summers and warm winters, it held its beauty through its nature and large oceans. It was the only true beauty you had known all your life.

The sweet sounds of the animals hummed through the morning daylight. The early sun shone on you with its bright rays, delicately reflecting off of your skin as you soaked in its warmth. This would be the last you could appreciate heat like this. You never thought you'd ever see the day that you'd mess your home planet's year round summer weather.

The world of Calidum was known for its beautiful summers. The way the sun reflected off of the oceans waters with beautiful sparkles as soft breezes brought in the heartwarming, natural smells of the large bodies of water. Pure aqua, a smell you were fond of. It was what your home smelt like. A smell you'd never grow tired of.

Your gaze was out on the broad ocean your family's palace sat on, just at the edge of the water. Water crashed bellow and caused a soothing sound that drowned out the racing of your heart.

Today would be the last day of your freedom as the Princess of Calidum. Your last day of being a _child_. Or, _truly_ , your last day of being independent. You were considered too old to be left single, but that wasn't the reason why you were soon to be married off. Sure, twenty-three was an old age to still be unwedded, but you were doing just fine. Weren't you?

At least... _you_ were. Maybe not Calidum.

The royal city of Lux was in grave danger after a recent battle between the First Order and the Resistance. It had been rumored that the government of Calidum had considered reaching out and helping the Rebels, but it was just that— _rumors_.

Or so you believed.

The words reached out to the First Order—a military organization the people of Calidum were meant to support—and the response wasn't pleasant.

Threats were made. _Very_ dangerous threats. As the First Order recovered and rebuilt their second base (a weapon just as destructive, if not more than, Starkiller), there was heavy fear that they'd test their weapon on the fine yet not so fine planet of Calidum.

The only way out was a compromise. A treaty.

A settlement.

And you, the dear Princess of Calidum, was the offer.

It made your insides turn. Your heart race. Your hands clamp and throat dry.

You weren't a pawn. You weren't a toy or matter of exchange. You weren't money or goods to be traded. You were a living, breathing, being. You were a _person_.

Yet... here you were, standing at the balcony of your living quarters, enjoying the last sunrise you'd ever experience on your home world of Calidum. Before you were shipped off... to be a bride.

A sadness overwhelmed you at the realization that, in a matter of minutes, you'd soon leave your bedroom (one you very much loved) for good.

It pained you, knowing you'd leave this life behind. Knowing you were being married off to someone you absolutely _feared_.

It hurt knowing your beloved parents would agree to such terms rather than think of another way out.

It terrified you knowing you would never feel at home again.

With a sharp intake of breath and a bat of your eyelashes to free the newfound tears that peaked, you heard metallic footsteps from behind you.

"My dear princess, the shuttle has arrived for your departure." J-1AE, your personal droid, informed. "They await your presence."

Getting one last good look at the ocean and the nearby structures that sat along the beachside, you turned on your heel and aimed for the droid as it stood there, just near your bedside. "Thank you, Jay." You bowed your head with a small smile. A sad smile.

For a droid, Jay understood the look on your face. It recognized the pain. The droid didn't want you to leave, never wanted to say goodbye, but droids didn't have attachments... Even if the droid had known you for so long.

Aiming for the main door of your room as Jay followed closely behind, you eyed the space once more. You relished in the memories, in all that you could remember. Your father cradling you to sleep from nightmares. Your mother kissing your forehead goodnight. Your kid brother sneaking into your room in the middle of the night, afraid of the thunderstorms. The little things is what had your heart tearing to pieces.

With a swallow and an intake of breath, you exited your room and made your way to the main entrance of the palace. All that was missing for your departure was you, your items packed and your family awaiting you to say goodbye.

A part of you knew you should've been bitter, upset at the matter. You should've fought against it, given them options... but, you knew you had no say. You hardly had any authority. _Princess_ was just a title and nothing more. You were powerless. You were defenseless, and you were left to your fear and dwindling hope that you wouldn't be killed in your first week... let alone, _first day_.

Approaching the main steps, seeing your family await you as they watched you make your way down, you made the final step before standing before them. Curtsying to the queen—your mother—then bowing your head to your father, your eyes landed on your brother. The eight year old boy who had admired you. Who aspired to be like you. The little boy who loved you more than all the stars loved the night sky.

His eyes were puffy, as if he had been crying beforehand. But the tears he must've shed weren't enough. New ones had formed and hung on his dark, long eyelashes. He tried blinking them away, but the frown on his lips gave the pain away. The little boy was trying to be strong for you, but even then, he couldn't handle the idea of his sister—his _idol_ —leaving him forever.

"Please don't go!" He wailed out, rushing up to you and latching onto your golden gown. His grip was tight, nearly dragging you down with him as he cried into the material of your dress.

Your heart ached and your jaw clenched. You felt your eyes burn, but now wasn't the time to cry. You saved that for when you were left alone.

Gently peeling off the little boy, you knelt before him and wiped his tears. "All is well, my little prince." You assured him, giving him a small smile. "I assure you, little brother, we will see each other again."

Pouting as his chest heaved, you held his cheeks. "Is that a promise?" He asked as you softly smiled.

"Yes." You had _hoped_. You could feel the king and queen's eyes on you, but that didn't matter at the moment. _He_ did, the little one before you. Your closest friend. Your brother. "You will be a fine king one day and I will be there to support you along the way." You smiled, swiping your finger under his chin as he whimpered. "Believe me, little brother... We will get through this." You nodded. You spoke those words, more in assurance to yourself than anything else.

"I will miss you." He frowned.

"I will miss you more." Wrapping your arms around him tightly, taking the moment in as you shut your eyes, you then let go before pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead. "Take good care of the palace." You winked as he softly smiled.

"I will try to be as strong and as smart as you are." He nodded as you smiled.

"You will be stronger and smarter, I believe that." You nodded before standing up, sensing a presence approach you from behind.

"It is time we make our departure." A firm voice spoke, laced with authority as you turned to see a First Order officer stand there with his arms behind him.

"Very well." You breathed, looking back down at your brother as he had slowly let go of your dress before taking his place back next to the king.

Eyeing them as they both gave you small nods, you gulped. You wanted one last hug, one last _everything will be_ _okay_ from your father like all those times you had nightmares, one last kiss on the cheek from your mother—but neither came. Instead, they watched. They watched as if you were a mere guest rather than their daughter.

 _Adoptive_ daughter.

Maybe that's why it was suddenly so easy to give you up, even if all those years before they made it seem like the term adoptive meant nothing when they treated you as if you truly were their own blood.

Remembering the presence behind you, you sucked in a breath and nodded before turning away, Jay giving you a small wave from afar as you gently smiled before losing sight of the droid. Losing all that was once your everything, that now... turned into nothing.

Following the man dressed in an all black uniform as two stormtroopers followed closely behind, you treaded your way up the ramp of the shuttle before looking one last time over to the palace steps. For a faint moment, you could just barely see regret in your father's eyes. And for a split second, you could see the shimmer of a tear rolling down your mother's cheek.

"Welcome aboard, princess." A pilot bowed as you entered, you half smiling back with a nod. "We should arrive at Starkiller II in no time."

With a sigh at the statement, you took a seat and stared at your hands that held your knees. Soon, you would be nothing more than a bride and the title of _princess_ would mean nothing.  
  
  
  


 

 **The** sudden tremble of the shuttle landing snapped you out of your blank thoughts. You had sat there, for what felt like forever, staring at nothing. Thinking about nothing. Yet, fear still coursed through your veins. And that fear would soon intensify when your feet would hit the base.

"I do hope you have a thick cloak on, the weather may not be fit for your warm blood." The officer spoke, disinterestedly, as if he could careless that your body would not react well to cold weather.

Standing up as you tightened your cloak around you, seeing as it once simply hung on your shoulders, you felt the cold air kick in as the ramp lowered, fresh snow patting against the dark pathway as your eyes then landed on the distant structure.

"The Supreme Leader's palace." A stormtrooper nearly muttered to you as you blinked a few times. "Where you will be going." Swallowing the lump in your throat, you nodded.

"Lead the way." The same officer from before waved a hand as the pair of stormtroopers—including the one who mumbled to you—took lead.

The air was frigid as the snow was thick. You had only been to a few snowy places before, but you were not accustomed to such weather. You were already freezing, trembling, as your teeth chattered. The rest of the people around you? Not so much. They seemed unfazed.

Approaching the black structure that contrasted the bright snow, your stomach turned. This was your new home. A snowy satellite with cloudy skies and a partially hidden sun. Nothin like your home-world.

Climbing the steps and entering the large palace—a palace far more symmetrical than your parents' own—you followed along the long, dark, windowless hallways. There was hardly any design, just flags upon flags of the First Order symbol, nothing more. Much more bland than you had expected.

But, truly, what did you expect from the First Order?

"These will be your chambers until your wedding ceremony. Till then, you live here. Your meals will either be served to you or you will to be seated in the dining hall." The officer informed you as he opened the door to the living quarter. "You have your personal tablet for assistance and soon will be assigned a personal droid. There shall be no need of lonesome wondering or any outdoor exploring. This is a base and nothing here is a playground." He nearly seethed as your heart sank. This was nothing like the life you lived before.

And, yet, all you did was nod.

"The general will soon pay you a visit and bring you to the Supreme Leader. Till then, do not leave your chambers." Handing you the tablet, the man swiftly left your room and shut the door with an echoed thud.

Taking in a deep breath, you turned on your heel and placed the tablet to a side before eyeing the room. Not as large as your old one, but still quite the size.

The floors were black tile; large, grey carpets had sat underneath the bed and dressers, as well as nightstands. The walls were a bloody red and the ceiling was far too high for its own good—as well as the bed frame, itself.

The room was exaggerated in its gothic design. Much too dark, the opposite of your old, golden and white bedroom. You felt caged. Locked in and held against your will. You felt like you were trapped in some sort of hell that you had no way out of.

You began to panic.

This was your new home and it was nowhere near your comfort zone.

Shutting your eyes and taking in deep breaths, you focused on your breathing while you tried to ease yourself. You would do fine. You would survive this. There could've been far worse circumstances... right? "Right."

Sucking in a breath, walking over to a large, tall window, that had a seat with a few pillows attached to it, you were just about to sit, only to hear a knock.

Turning your attention away from the crimson colored pillows that sat atop of the black cushion, you aimed for the door before it had opened. "Princess Y/N." The red-head man before you spoke. A small bow from his head as he held his hands behind himself. "Welcome to Starkiller II."

"Thank you." You faintly smiled.

"I am General Hux." He introduced as you nodded. "Before I bring you to the Supreme Leader, there a few places I'd like to show you."

"Of course." You nodded once again. Before you knew it, you were following Hux around like a lost soul, holding your hands together as you eyed the interior design. Lots of dark colors and lots of exaggerated architecture.

Black staircases, dark red furniture, tall walls, high ceilings... It was far too eerie. But, what did you expect from the First Order?

Hux had shown you a few areas: the living quarters, main kitchen, the many studies, the large archive room, the entrance and the dining hall. All in which were very large in scale and looked deserted, as if no one ever came to the palace. You believed majority of the Order men and women worked within the base itself rather than the palace.

"With the weather, it is best you stay indoors. The terrace is open if you are willing to withstand the cold. The supposed garden is all covered in snow and hardly has any use in you visiting." Hux had informed you as you held back a sigh in discontent. What were you supposed to do then? Sit around and be lazy? That was very much unlike you. You needed something to do.

 _Anything_.

"Very well." You nodded.

"Right then, the Supreme Leader is a very busy man as of late, so you will hardly see him." Hux said, and you couldn't help but feel relieved. You truly didn't want to be around the man who was known for his poor temper and killing streak.

"Yes, of course." You nodded, earning a small look from Hux as if he questioning whether or not you were happy by the news. But, he simply shrugged it off and lead you to the last sight on his supposed tour—the throne room.

The one place you hadn't realized you dreaded.

Your eyes grew in size at the large black doors that had gold incrusted within it; surprisingly seeing as the palace hardly held any color that _wasn't_ red.

The sight intimidate you, doors too large for your liking and the feeling from behind it made your stomach churn. Almost as if you were going to hurl.

Too lost in your state of shock, Hux came to a stop as a pair of men, cladded in all black—looking nothing like the stormtroopers—guarded the entrance.

With a bow of his head, the two guards opened the doors as your heart lodged up your throat.

Blinking a few times at the sight now before you, your heart leapt within your chest. The whole room shined from the black marble that encased every inch of it. From the far back, four long windows surrounded the throne. It sat high, above many steps that were split in two with the center being open. The throne itself was dressed in reds and golds, the only part sticking out from the black room. Everything else was vast. Wide open with enough room to hold a ball in. But you were sure such events never existed.

Lifting your focus high, up to the ceilings that were practically in the clouds (if clouds were indoors) you realized there were faint carvings and paintings. You couldn't quite draw out what it portrayed, but you believed it to be some sort of battle.

"Princess." The voice cut off your gawking, lowering your vision to Hux as he nudged his head for you to follow.

"Right." You nearly whispered, your heels echoing throughout the hall before the doors closed with a hum.

You hadn't realized it until an uncomfortable sensation made your skin crawl. Something... _Someone_ was staring at you. You felt the heavy gaze, and it wasn't Hux.

Lifting your focus and seeing more guards like the one at the doors stand before you, four lined up by the double stair case—with two at each side—you gulped at their weaponry before you noticed these weren't the eyes that you felt on you...

Rather, those from above.

Those from the man in the throne you hadn't noticed until your eyes lifted. The black figure that nearly blended into his seat if it wasn't for his pale face.

And, to your luck, those were the eyes that you felt boring into your skin. The eyes of the Supreme Leader.

"Supreme Leader." Hux bowed at the hip as you had done the same. "This is—"

"I know who this is." The voice boomed, rudely. You could almost hear the venom dripping from his tone. It seemed as if he wanted this much less than you did. He was not interested in marriage. This was a scheme. A scheme for him to have heirs and to somewhat pardon your home-world from its accusations.

Feeling your body tremble as your insides twisted, you slowly lifted your focus and met the Supreme Leader's, instantly shivering at his cold glare.

It was hate. Pure hate in those eyes. Even from the distance you were in, you knew he loathed you already. Why wouldn't he? After all, he was nearly forced into a marriage just to have more alliances and to have a legacy.

"Of course, Supreme Leader." Hux nodded as he took in an almost quiet, deep breath. "I believed—"

"I've seen enough." The Supreme Leader interrupted once again, eyes never leaving yours as his eyebrows furrowed. "Seeing as there is _nothing_ to see, this is a waste of my time, I have more important matters, _General_." He seethed as you nearly gasped. "Remove her from my sight."

At the demand, Hux nodded, you blinking away any straggling tears to prevent your vulnerability from being shown. "Yes, Supreme Leader."

You hadn't even introduced yourself, didn't even get the chance to thank him for his not-so-hospitable hospitality. After all, you were raised with manners... But, it seemed as if you weren't worth his time. Even if you were to be his future wife.

You were more terrified than ever. This wasn't going to go any better than you expected. Actually, it was going to be worse.

How were you to survive this?

How were you to be with a man who only believed in hate rather than love?


	2. Somber

**Dark** shadows casted upon you eerily as you treaded down the same pathway as earlier. The palace was much too... gloomy for your liking. It was too quiet and too empty, which left you with your somber thoughts.

Hux had _somewhat_ kindly escorted you back to your chambers, much too silent along the way as if what had happened was nothing out of the norm and wasn't worthy of discussion.

Yet, there you were, bones rattled as you blinked a countless number of times to rid your threatening tears. How had the Supreme Leader already assessed an opinion on you without hearing you speak? Sure, it was an awful ordeal to be put in, but not even _you_ deserved that sort of treatment.

The fear only grew worse on you.

This would be the man you'd soon marry. The man you'd live with, sleep with... have _children_ with. The idea irked you. You shivered at the thought. Your body trembled as you had shut your eyes momentarily to regain yourself. You never thought that in a million years, your adoring parents would give you up so easily to save their people. Surely there _had_ to be some other way.

Not realizing you had made it to the doors you'd soon familiarize as your own, you stood there for a moments worth while staring at the black surface.

You could feel Hux's focus on you, watching you intently. Were furious? Afraid? Numb? The latter seemed more plausible than anything else with the blank expression on your face.

He wondered if you had already known about the _infamous_ Kylo Ren. If you were aware of his traits, personality, and being as whole. You must've been to so easily have an opinion. At least, Hux assumed you had one.

Or maybe, just maybe, Ren's reaction to you was nothing you had never seen before? He couldn't believe that, even Hux had sensed a good spirit in you. That you were tolerable than the rest. Ren was just being angsty as per usual.

Rolling his eyes at his own thoughts, Hux broke the silence with a clear of his throat. "Your droid should arrive momentarily. Once it has, inform it on whether or not you will be joining the Supreme Leader for dinner this evening. Although I suggest you _do_ , you do not want him thinking you're already afraid." Hux had suggested as you looked over at him, eyebrows furrowed. "It's best not to give Ren the attention he wants. If you skip out, his pride will only surface. Attend the dinner, no harm can be done unless insults are much more powerful than blaster fires for you." With a small bow of his head and a turn of his heel, Hux left your presence.

Blinking a few times, you looked over to see he truly was gone. The hallway now empty and left with just you. You didn't like the quietness, the lack of movement and sound terrified you.

Turning back to your door and entering your room, you shut it behind you before pressing your back against it.

You needed to clear your mind, remind yourself why you were put to do this. Forced to marry the Supreme Leader. You would be saving _your_ planet and _your_ people. A princess doing the hard work that was marrying an overly brooding, temperamental, aggressive Force user. Sure, that would work _perfectly_.

Sucking in a sharp breath as you stared at the ground, you blinked a few times as your eyes burned. Tears had surfaced. Your sense of fear was once again back.

You were alone. You were scared. You felt _vulnerable_.

Kylo was a beast of his own creation and there was no doubt that he'd lash out on you. And so he did with his verbs. How would you last all eternity this way?

Feeling your knees shake, you forced yourself straight and off of the door, aiming for the window sill and plopping on it, looking outside and watching the fresh snow fall. This was nothing like home. Nowhere near it. You weren't used to the cold, to the lack of sun and ocean. No blossoming nature.

No, instead, all you had was a field of white and a hazed out sun.

Pouting in your spot, taking in deep breaths to hold in your tears, you leaned your head back and wrapped your arms around a pillow. Tightly. You needed to let out your frustrations in someway. _Somehow_. You couldn't cry. Not now, not ever. You were a big girl, you were a _princess_ , far worse could've occurred.

You had to remind yourself that you were still alive. That your planet was still in one piece, that the people prospered as your family breathed. This was what had to keep you going. The fears of your own could not tie you down.

But, eventually, even the toughest princesses broke.

Hearing a sudden knock, you lifted your head and stood up, placing the pillow back down before quietly walking towards the door. Sucking in a breath, you opened it and saw a rather tall droid walk in. It was taller than you, possibly taller than the average man. "Good afternoon, I am LO7I. Your personal droid." It greeted as you eyed it.

It was in all black with hints of silvers and some reds. Its supposed eyes was just a bar of light as was its mouth. "Hello... Low." You greeted back with a small nod. "I suppose you're here to ask whether or not I will be joining for dinner?" You sighed as it stood there.

"Well, Princess... I was programmed to assist you and in order to do that was to meet you... But, yes. Will you be joining the Supreme Leader for dinner?" Low asked as you gulped, thinking back to Hux's words.

"Yes." You nodded. You had to join. You did not want Kylo Ren to take you for a fool. Or for weak. You weren't weak. If you had been, you would've wrestled to stay home. Yet, here you were, in your new personal quarters, on a satellite that could tear off a star system from the face of the universe, while holding your cloak closed. "I will."

"Wonderful." It bowed. "I shall inform the servants to set up your spot." Low said as you let out a quiet breath. "If you must need me, you can reach out through your tablet. I am truly one click away." The droid said as you hummed in response.

"Thank you, Low."

"My pleasure." Crossing it's arm over its chest, the droid bent at the hip and bowed before leaving your presence.

" _Pleasure_..." You mocked with a shake of your head. "What must a droid know about that? It clearly can not sense how miserable I am." You grumbled to yourself, a bit surprised in word choice. This very much wasn't like you. At all.  
  
  
  


 **Dinner** had filled the halls with its delightful scent. The moment Low had sent a stormtrooper to retrieve you was the first moment in hours that you weren't so focused on sulking. You hadn't left the window sill since then until you heard a knock. "Coming!"

Approaching the door, opening it and nearly being blinded by the bright white armor, you lifted your focus to see it was—indeed—a stormtrooper. "Good evening, Princess." The trooper gestured with a small bow of its head.

"Hello." You simply responded, leaving the room and aiming down the halls.

"I suppose you wouldn't remember who I am." The trooper spoke. "I am the man—well, _trooper_ —from earlier." They said as your eyebrows narrowed. "The same one who mentioned where you would be taken." Lifting your eyebrows, you remembered.

"Ah, yes, you..." You pointed with a nod. "What's your name?" You asked.

"My name?" He stiffened, breath caught in his throat as his pace faltered. "I am referred to as DN-2000."

"Much to remember." You teased, waving a hand as the man nodded, not willing to disrespect the future Mrs. Ren— _empress Ren?_ What would be your title?

"You could simply call me 2000?" He suggested, but you shook your head.

"You are not a number..." You sighed, now tapping your chin. "DN... Din... Hmm, Dan? Yes... Dan... Daniel?" You asked, looking up at him. If he hadn't had a helmet on, he sure would've been wide-eyed at the gesture.

"Whatever pleases you... Princess." He nodded as you smiled. Your first true smile since you left Calidum.

"Daniel it is. Quite casual but I like it." You chuckled, Daniel looking over at you for a moment. He would've believed that the same woman from earlier had been replaced... but maybe you were just trying to feel comfortable in some way. You were making a compromise.

The rest of the walk was quiet, minus the clacking of your heels. There was a sense that Daniel wanted to say something more, you were unsure of what, but the moment he made it to the dining hall and left you with a bow, the sensation left.

"Princess." A service droid greeted as you turned in your spot, seeing a droid nearly your height speak. "May I show you to your seat?"

Sucking in a small breath, eyeing the two men that were cladded in black stand on either side of the door stare straight ahead, you nodded. "Of course..." With a small sigh, and a sudden skip in your heart beat, your anxieties crashed in. You would be greeted— _scrutinized_ —by the Supreme Leader once again.

 _It'll all be okay_. You assured yourself. _For the people of Calidum and little brother_.

Forcing a smile on your lips, the doors opened as the service droid lead the way.

You felt the sensation of eyes all over your body, knowing very well that—thankfully—it wasn't just you and _him_ there for dinner. The moment you lifted your focus, they instantly landed on _his_. Chills ran down your spine as you shivered and you were sure the Supreme Leader smirked at that.

So casually looking away and eyeing the rest of guests—which you assumed to be upper ranking officers worthy enough to be in the palace—the droid came to a stop and pulled back a chair.

Lifting your eyes to see your seat was diagonal to the Supreme Leader's as he had the head seat, you gulped, forced yet another smile on your lips, and quietly thanked the droid before sitting.

A thank you to a droid? That was quite unheard of. Those nearest to you heard it and gave you odd looks. You were to be the future empress? The Supreme Leader's wife and right hand?

 _Sure_.

You felt another shiver work it's way down your spine as you sat there, eyeing the empty plate. He was staring at you. _Glaring_ at you. For what reason? You did not want to uncover.

Maybe he was plotting your demise, a way to say _Oh_ _no_ _!_ _The_ _princess has been killed!_ just so he could get you off of his back. Or maybe, just maybe, he liked to see you writhe in your seat, knowing he had _that_ power.

If that were the case, you wouldn't let him win. You were no fool, and as much as you believed to be weak as of late with the situation at hand, you had the ability to be strong and withstand the Supreme Leader's obstacles. You would get to him. Somehow, someday. And, eventually, he will accept the circumstances.

Hearing the whispers amongst the officers as they discussed whatever matters at hand, you sat there silently, focusing on your breathing rather than the Supreme Leader's intense eyes. He had, not once, looked away from you.

The dinner was quiet, you ate silently while (on the occasion) speaking to those surrounding officers who had caught your attention. You kept to yourself and only spoke when spoken to, sitting with your back straight and your hands crossed over one another on your legs. You didn't want to give away the fact that you felt uncomfortable, out of place, and afraid.

Possibly why you were playing footsies with yourself.

With the way Kylo Ren was staring at you the entire evening, you had no chance of letting any emotions slip. He was like a shark waiting for the bait to snap on. He wouldn't dare look away from you, not once. The Supreme Leader would learn your weaknesses.

"It was a pleasure meeting you, Princess." Now standing before an officer, just near the main doors of the dining room, the man held your hand and pressed a small kiss on the back of it before bowing his head.

"Likewise, Colonel." You nodded back with a small smile. All the other officers had nearly done the same, paying you respect seeing as you were the one to marry their Supreme Leader. They _had_ to. Little did they know, their Supreme Leader wouldn't give less of a damn if you were mistreated... Right?

Just about to exit the area with the rest, the pair of figures that guarded the door came to a stop before you and blocked your path. What had you done?

Furrowing your eyebrows, you heard the sound of a glass being settled on the table before the sound of fingertips tapping against its surface. _He_ wanted your attention. That's what was happening. But, why?

Slowly turning, taking in a deep breath. you kept a calm expression as your eyes connected with his... although you were sure your soul left your body at that very moment. Even from afar, the intensity of his eyes were far too strong. "You." He spoke as you blinked.

"Supreme Leader." You bowed your head, unsure of what to do.

"Your presence is _unwanted_." He suddenly seethed, as if the moment the doors had shut behind you was enough for him to drop his mask. The Supreme Leader truly despised you. "You are only here as a mere token to prove your planets loyalty. A pawn in a game to give the First Order more alliances." He explained, as if you hadn't known this already.

"I am well aware, Supreme Leader." You calmly spoke, holding your hands together before you.

Glaring and feeling his upper lip twitch, Kylo Ren nearly slammed his fist down as he stood up, chair scratching against the floor with a loud squeak as you faintly flinched. "So then you are aware that this marriage is a waste of _my_ time? That it is completely _pointless_?" He asked, storming towards you as your heart skipped a beat. "That I don't need a _useless_ wife to tie me down and think she can tell me what to do? Heirs aren't truly in the picture, I couldn't give less of a damn, it was an idea that seemed plausible and since I could be killed at any given moment, it was the only reason why I so easily complied with such a foolish compromise." Kylo spat, now standing before you, _towering_ you as your heart raced. How tall was he? He was over a foot taller, he must've been, and that made it all the worse.

Standing there silent, lips parted as if words wanted to spill out, your throat locked as Kylo's fury-filled-eyes tore right through your soul, he leaned in and gritted his teeth.

"I will never, _ever_ , fall in love with a little girl like you. Love is for fools. Love only _weakens_ you. You are nothing but a mere toy in my game and your title of _princess_ is worthless here." At that, he walked around you and left you trembling in your spot, the air not making its way to your brain as if you had been holding it in place.

Blinking a few times, your knees gave out and sent you to the floor before you could even stop yourself.

So much for the brave face.


	3. Mislead

**Time** had seem like a foreign concept to you. How long was a minute, truly? Or an hour? It all felt the same. It blended and bled together. It felt like an eternity and, in reality, you couldn't quite measure eternity.

Your lungs ached from all the huffing, your eyes burned with the ever-flowing tears as your back ached from being hunched. You were only a day in and you were supposed to marry _that_? A man who didn't believe in love? A man who hated your entire being?

You were trying your damndest to keep your head held high, but he was the trigger that set you off. He had to have been, he truly was the only person you feared. No one else compared.

And now you were set to marry him in due time... You wouldn't survive your life much longer, you were positive he'd try anything to kill you once you gave him his heirs.

Too focused on your whimpering, footsteps echoed in the now barren room, stopping before you then crouching. "Princess?"

Hearing the altered voice, you quickly looked up and wiped your tears. It was a stormtrooper. No one else. "S— Sorry, I—"

"It's alright. It's me... uh— Daniel." He nodded as you softly smiled.

"Oh, hello..." You greeted, nodding, trying to collect yourself. "I am... I'm so sorry you had to see—"

"Don't apologize. It's alright, I've seen much worse." He confessed as you sucked in a small breath. "But, I will be honest... Nothin seems worse than a princess crying."

Sighing while lowering your focus down to your dress as it had puffed around you, you shook your head. "It's alright. I'm alright." You nodded, assuring him. "I'm... I'm okay." Looking back up and smiling, realizing the helmet limited you from seeing the man's emotions, you let out another sigh. "It's a shame you have to wear that helmet constantly... I could use a friend right now that has an actual face..." You muttered, looking back down at your dress.

Staring at you with furrowed eyebrows hidden behind his helmet, Daniel felt his shoulders drop as he watched you fiddle with your thumbs. He truly felt terrible for you. Although, stormtroopers surely didn't have sentimentality... it was hard to dismiss. You seemed so lonely. So sad. So afraid... And, in his mind and heart, you were too beautiful to feel such things.

Sitting there and wiping the few tears that continued to slip, you heard a small hiss of air before looking up and feeling your heart stop. You were more than positive that he was breaking protocol in doing such gesture. "Well, I may not be entirely what you need, but I've been told I have a friendly face." The man softly chuckled, dimples appearing with his smile as you smiled back. "A princess such as yourself deserves to smile. All will be alright." He assured, reaching his free hand out that wasn't occupied by his helmet.

Sucking in a small breath, looking into the man's crystal blue eyes that were the total opposite of the Supreme Leader's—far more welcoming—you reached your hand out and took his, standing up together. "Thank you, Daniel." You gently spoke, almost afraid that if your voice rose just a smidgen, it'd ruin the good you had going.

"Of course." He winked, giving you a bright smile before covering his face with his helmet once again. "I will walk you to your quarters. It is my duty, after all, but it is more of a want than a task." Daniel admitted as your heart fluttered.

"I appreciate it." You nodded as the two of you made your way out of the dining room, down the halls that lead to your quarters.

"I truly apologize about the Supreme Leader... He— He is... He— Well—"

"Has a temper?" You finished for him.

"Mhm." He nodded. "A temper, yes... But he has done a lot of good for the First Order. We have gained so many new alliances and made many improvements under his watch." Daniel confessed as you listened, breathing in and thinking about what the Supreme Leader had said not that long before. "I believe that... he lets it all get to him. His title and abilities. He allows the power and control to... _control_ him."

Gulping, you nodded.

"There is more to him, I feel. Or maybe I am looking too deeply into it. But, I always find the good in the troubled.  I don't know why... But, I do. And there is something in him." Daniel said as you stayed quiet. "Maybe this marriage will change him." He offered, but you shook your head.

"I'm not here to change him... I'm not here to make him a good man. If he wants to improve himself, he must take the first steps. To him, I am nothing but a pawn." You frowned, trying to keep your calm.

"If there is good... If there was _something_ there... Then, with time... it will show itself." Daniel assured, you could almost _hear_ his smile. "You are no pawn and he is not immune to love. But that is all I have to say."  
  
  
  


 **Sleep** was much desired... but so was overthinking. At least, according to your mind.

The second you had entered your new quarters, you peeled your gown off and took a nice bath. Filling the tub to the brim, bubbles surfacing as you sank in, you allowed the warm water to ease you. You hadn't realized how tense your body was until then. You could still feel the Supreme Leader's eyes on you as if he were still there.

Sinking just enough for your nose to brush the water, you let out a breath through it as the water rippled. Daniel's words echoed through your mind. Maybe there was more to Kylo and maybe he was letting his title get to him. There had to have been more to that walking cloud of doom.

He was going to be your husband after all. You were going to be with him forever, or until he killed you. _Stop thinking like that!_ You scolded yourself mentally, shutting your eyes and resting your head back. At least you survived your first day on Starkiller II.   
  
  
  


_"_ ** _It's_** _you and me, until the end of time."_ A voice echoed. The vision before you was dim, but it seemed as if the sun was setting. An orange glow beamed over the two figures that you couldn't draw it. Then, in an instant, your hand was holding tightly onto someone else's.

 _"Promise me?"_ The other voice spoke. You weren't sure who it was. You couldn't truly hear it but you knew _someone_ said _something_.

Their grasp had tightened, like a snake restricted against its prey. Fear of letting go. Fear of losing. There was something in their firm grip that felt almost as if an outside force wanted them to let go. " _I promise_."

In an instant, the world had blurred around you. Dark clouds, heavy rainfall, distant lightening that roared across the night sky. Your heart was racing.

You felt lost. Scared. Confused.

Where were you? You couldn't see anything. Nothing but trees and rain. The faint moon breaking through the storm clouds just enough to light your way.

Your voice called out, your lips had parted, but you couldn't understand a thing? What were you saying?

You yelled and yelled, but nothing came out. All you felt was pain and loss. You were terrified and hopeless. Your skin soaked and clothing latched to it _. "MOONDUST!"_

Forcing yourself awake, you nearly choked on the water from the tub. You had fallen asleep in it and hadn't realized it... And, for how long? Blinking a few times and coughing out, you held your chest and felt your heart racing.

Gulping, you rubbed your face and stood from the water drying up and wrapping the towel around you before draining the water. You tried not paying your dreams any mind, instead, you changed into your nightwear that was—of course—an all black, silk nightgown and crawled under the thick sheets.

You were exhausted, your eyes were heavy, but you couldn't seem to sleep. The word... term... _nickname?_ _'_ moondust' stuck in your mind's orbit. Maybe it was just a dream and nothing more. _Maybe_.

But, as the late hours of the night moved on, keeping you still on your bed while staring at the ceiling above you... _moondust_ felt heavy on your chest. What for?

Blinking a few times, yawning and feeling the desire to rest but truly unable to, you turned on your side. You thought about the dreams you had, the two lone figures that you watched. The way they held hands. How _you_ held someone's hand. How it all felt so familiar yet so far away.

You hadn't noticed it until your nose tickled, but tears had fallen. Your body began to tremble as you sucked in your bottom lip. The loneliness crept back in. Worse than ever.

Life wasn't all that hard, but it wasn't easy either. Being the adopted child of the King and Queen was well known. Not many—practically no one—spoke  to you. They greeted you out of respect and nothing more. It was almost a sin to be adopted... Or, it felt like it.

You never felt like you were in the right place. You never belonged. It always felt wrong but you told yourself otherwise because the love your parents gave you.

At least... they _did_. You couldn't say the same now, could you?

You don't recall ever having a friend, let alone, a best friend. Your personal droid was your closest thing to a friend and when your little brother was born, he truly was all you had. And he loved you more than life itself. Out of everyone you've ever known, he was the one who meant the world to you.

But now that was gone and you were left to your own devices. To be someone's wife who wouldn't dare give you a chance for reasons unbeknownst to you.

The feeling weighed on your shoulders—on your _back_ _—_ as you rested on your bed. If he were to be your husband, there had to be a way to get through to him. He couldn't possibly be a vessel for pure hate, could he? There had to be something in there for him to grasp onto. Something small, that was just about enough to _at least_ accept a friendship... right?

 _You're getting your hopes too high_. You thought to yourself, sighing.

That was the problem with you: you tried so hard to find the good in things. To _get_ the good in things. To get it out of the bad. Life couldn't be just black and white, it was a spectrum. That's what made life so beautiful and the Supreme Leader couldn't possibly only have hate in his shriveled heart. You wouldn't believe it. You wouldn't _accept_ _it_.

It was an act. A defense mechanism.

No, your job wasn't to save him. To bring him to the light. To bring balance or whatever the case may be. No... You wanted to bring a balance _within_ him. To make him realize that he didn't have to be so hateful in order to be the greatest leader. There was more to ruling—and life—than being a complete... in simple terms, _prick_.

Sighing once again, lifting the sheets higher to burry yourself in its embrace, you shut your eyes and hoped for peace. You had just about a month till you were _truly_ married off. A month of you trying to find ways to make matters _better_. To make the Supreme Leader realize that you were not as awful as he was making you out to be.

You weren't asking for him to fall in love with you. It was clear that he didn't want to. Either way, _you_ wouldn't love _him_. This wasn't a one way street. You weren't going to fall in love with a man who hated your guts for no apparent reason. Let alone... a man who contributed to the arranged marriage rather than _actually_ wanted it.

For now, you tried to rest. To get some sleep in you before you find out you had been awake and pondering for over three hours. You wouldn't tell then, the darkness destroyed any reality or sense of time.   
  
  
  


" ** _Starlight?_** "

—" _Moondust?_ "

" _Never forget what we have_."

—" _Of course not_."

" _Please... I couldn't bare it. The loss_."

—" _Neither can I_..."

" _I fear... our luck is running out_."

—" _Moondust_..."

" _We will see each other again in due time. I know we will. I feel it_."

—" _Why do you say this?_ "

" _Because... Something out of our control will happen. And we will not be able to stop it_."

"Princess? Good morning, it is 0700 and breakfast will be served quite soon!" The robotic voice sounded from behind the door of your room as you haphazardly rubbed your face, bones feeling too heavy as you groaned, waking from your slumber.

You hadn't dreamt that night, instead, you heard—or at least imagined to have heard—altered voices echo throughout the darkness of your mind. Everything was so still and quiet until those words had spoken out.

"Princess?"

"Thank you, Low!" You called out, voice scratchy before clearing it. "I will be ready as soon as I can."

"Wonderful. I will send a stormtrooper to retrieve you." At that, you heard the droids footsteps retreat.

Sitting up and stretching your arms and back, you stood from the bed and aimed for the bathroom, lazily washing your face, brushing your teeth... showering and drying up. You hardly had any motivation, your internal conflict from that night before was lingering.

Brushing your hair out and pulling it back into an intricate hairdo with strands of curled hair hanging loosely, you zipped on one of your more casual gowns—seeing as you were lucky enough to _at least_ keep your wardrobe from home. It was a simple, soft blue color. The sleeves were long as the gown hung loosely from the waist down. Your chest was partially exposed and the sleeves not doing you justice, causing you to pull your cloak on for extra warmth.

You would have to get your blood used to the cold weather eventually... _Somehow_.

Hearing a gentle knock on your door, you turned from your spot after you slipped your feet into your heels and aimed over.

"Good morning, Princess." The tone of voice was familiar as you had opened the door.

"Daniel?" You asked as the stormtrooper nodded, earning a smile from you. "I'm starting to wonder if you're my personal guard..."

"Sort of? The General assigned me to you whenever you were in need of an escort. He claimed I was as level headed as you? Whatever that implies..." He chuckled as you smiled. "Anyway, breakfast awaits."

Seeing him nod his head and gesturing for you to go ahead, you did so.

The walk was peaceful. Much too short, but you appreciated it. Daniel was wonderful company and you welcomed his presence. You truly felt honored and lucky enough to have him as your personal guard. You were more than positive that no one else would've been the right fit... Let alone, as _kind_.

"I leave you here." He bowed his head as the pair of men in black opened the doors. "I will return to escort you back."

"Thank you, Daniel." You smiled as he nodded, turning and walking away, knowing very well that he—nor any troopers—were allowed into many of the Supreme Leader's affairs.

But, as he did so, his eyes instantly landed on the man who took lead.

Daniel's heart skipped a beat as he stiffened in his spot, straightening his back and paying respect to the Supreme Leader as the man sauntered by. Cape ghosting behind him like a cloud as he held his fists right at his sides. Although it didn't seem as if he payed any attention to the trooper saluting him, his eyes shifted over and glared down at the man before looking back ahead and leaving Daniel shivering in his spot.

Sucking in a shaky breath, looking over at Kylo Ren as the man was approaching you, Daniel muttered a quiet prayer for you as he watched your figure just about to enter the dining hall.

Scanning the table just ahead of you, your eyebrows narrowed at the sight that the Supreme Leader wasn't there... Maybe he ate later? Or maybe he ate alone? You couldn't help but feel the slightest of relieved. Although your goal was to get a friend out of him, that didn't mean you weren't intimidated. He still had intense eyes and hands that could so easily choke you out.

Breathing in and wearing a smile, trying to seem as civil as possible, you were just about ready to take one step ahead, only to feel a strong grip come around you waist as you nearly stumbled to the right.

Looking up and feeling a gasp get caught in your throat, the man you believed to be absent from breakfast was suddenly at your side. Holding you with a deadly grip. Keeping his attention ahead with a tight jaw, as if he had no interest in having you _this_ close to him.

Taking in a slow, deep breath, you looked away and blinked a few times. Was this real? Surely it mustn't be... He was too close for his own liking, right?

Feeling him tug you with him, he walked you all along the table as all the eyes were on you. He was putting on a show, he must've been. He wanted people to believe that things were working out. Misleading their eyes.

Pulling your seat back as he let go of your waist—knowing very well there'd be a bruise left behind—he tucked you in and walked to his seat as you placed your right hand over left side, massaging it.

"Good morning, Supreme Leader." One of the officers bowed their head as the rest did the same. "Princess." Quickly looking up and dropping your hand, you gave them all a gentle smile with a nod, acknowledging them.

Shifting your eyes along the table and out the opened doors of the dining hall that would soon be closed, your eyebrows furrowed at the sight of the lone stormtrooper standing there. Frozen. Was it Daniel?

Looking back ahead, your attention was suddenly caught by Kylo as he had a twisted look in his eyes while looking ahead.

He wasn't looking at the officers, nor those who were guarding the door... rather—

_Daniel?_

 


	4. Jealousy

**Jealousy** was something you were sure Kylo Ren didn't feel. You were positive the look in his eyes was utter annoyance by the fact that the stormtrooper—Daniel—was still lingering about. Right?

 _Yeah... let's go with that_.

Taking a small breath while swallowing, you lowered your focus to the food that was being served. A rather large plate mixed with all sorts of proteins and carbs. It almost looked as if it fed for four mouths than just one. But, you shouldn't have been surprised, dinner the night before was the same... if not, more.

You understood that the man to the right of you needed that much food. After all, he was massive and was full of muscles. But, you? You loved food but not _that_ much.

Silently eating, keeping to yourself—as everyone else had, seeing it was too early in the morning—you filled yourself with as much food as you could before feeling stuffed.

Quietly exhaling in content, sitting back with your hands crossed on your lap (something that was very second nature of you), you felt eyes on you. As you always had the moment you arrived on Starkiller II.

Shifting the slightest, you watched as a service droid came in and cleared the dishes from before you, you subconsciously thanking it and not realizing it.

"Why do you feel the need to thank a droid for doing its job?" The voice to your right asked. The _Supreme Leader_.

It caught you off guard.

Did he just verbally acknowledge your presence? This meant you were getting somewhere... right? Even if you were sure what he was hinting at was offensive.

"It's second nature of me to thank those who do their duties correctly. Just like it's second nature of you to judge those you don't know." You simply answered, unsure of where that bold statement had come from. All you knew was that you didn't even shiver when you had said it, not an ounce of regret was felt when the words slipped your tongue. You just knew it wasn't going to sit well with Kylo. At all.

The way his eyes grew in size, how his jaw tightened and fists bawled up on the tables surface, you knew you struck a nerve. And you knew you were right.

 _He_ knew your were right.

Breakfast had reached its end as Kylo decided to stand up suddenly. He was the one to dismiss the guests. Usually, if it wasn't spoken, or a wave of a hand—as you had learned from the previous night—it was him getting up. Everyone knew in that moment they were pardoned.

Little did they knew he had done it as an outburst.

Watching him as you took in deep breaths, trying to keep your calm as he stared— _glared_ —at you, you stood up and patted down your gown. "Thank you for breakfast, Supreme Leader." You bowed your head. "It was an honor." This was your chance to leave. Although you were proud, you weren't willing to see the aftermath if there was going to be one.

Watching your figure descend from his vision, disappearing from the doors as the officers had reported to their duties, Kylo bit his tongue. You had no right to say such a thing, to have the guts to spit those words out at him!

Yet, here was, utterly dumbfounded at how _casually_ you had said it. How calmly it was spoken. Maybe that's why it hadn't hit him the way it should have... Maybe that's why he was so stunned at your sudden boost of courage.

So the princess had wit on her? She wasn't just some damsel he could cast aside... She was sharper than he thought.

 _Good_.

He couldn't help but smirk.

"So be it."

Turning a few corners and nearly rushing down halls, you leaned your back against a wall with a small huff. Resting your head back and shutting your eyes, you clutched your chest and sighed in relief. Had you truly said that to the Supreme Leader? There was no way that this man hadn't sent anyone to go after you.

Breathing in and out, steadying your aching lungs, you heard footsteps approach you, echoing throughout the tall walls as you lifted your head and opened your eyes. "Surprised you're still alive. Seeing as the Supreme Leader dragged you away."

Watching the stormtrooper approach you as you stood up straight, away from the wall, you nodded. "I am." You presented yourself. "Although... I think I _may_ have stepped out of bounds." You confessed as Daniel tilted his head.

"And, why is that? Should I be looking out for the Knights of Ren?" He asked as you blinked. Knights of Ren?

"I'm sorry... Who?" You asked.

"The Knights— Kylo Ren's personal guards. They were once Knights like him. He was their master, though." Daniel explained. "Kylo Ren was not only a commander, but he was the Master of the Knights of Ren... As well as apprentice of the previous Supreme Leader, Snoke.

Letting your mouth fall open as you slowly nodded, you shook your head. "Right. Well, no one is following me... Thankfully."

"We better hope he does not. What was it that you said, anyway?" Daniel asked as you sighed.

"Something along the lines of him being judgmental." You waved a hand. "It had... shut him up, at least." You faintly smirked, feeling quite proud of yourself for standing up to the man... although it not being your wisest decision.

"Bold." He nodded. "I am starting to believe that the two of you are made for each other." Daniel teased as you shook your head.

"Not in a million years." You chuckled. "We are forced into this marriage. More so, _I_ am forced into this marriage. This isn't some love story." You snickered. "I just... have to deal with it in some way, right? Make friends rather than enemies..."

"I suppose, yes." Daniel nodded. "As long as he isn't trying to murder you. I quite like your company. It's growing on me in the most positive of ways, and that has not happened in some time." He confessed as you smiled, walking up to him and getting hold of his forearm.

"We've got one another, hmm?" You hummed as he nodded. "At least I have a friend now who understands. Everyone else just nods, smiles, waves, or don't even bother at all." Looking up at him, where his eyes would be, you smiled. "I could use a friend."

"Stormtroopers don't entirely have friends. But... I suppose. I will be watching after you, anyway." He nodded as your smile grew. "Let's just... not let the Supreme Leader see that."

Feeling your eyes widen momentarily before smirking, you tilted your head. "Why not? It isn't like he likes me in such way. I am just his future, cute, little wife... I could have friends." You leaned in with a wink as Daniel laughed.

"Far enough, Princess. What will we be doing today?" He asked as you let out a small breath, tapping your chin and looking around you, only to spot one of the few, tall, stained glass windows that had snow falling on the opposite end.

"I want to see the snow." You nodded, looking back at Daniel. "I've never really seen snow before. None of my diplomatic missions involved snow planets." At your confession, Daniel took a step back.

"Well, then we must see the snow!" He nodded, gesturing his head for you to follow as you chuckled, watching him walk off in the opposite direction you were originally going in.

As you followed behind, eagerly walking with a small hop in your step, nearly forgetting about all your worries, Daniel had opened the terrace doors for you, allowing you to walk out first as you tightened your cloak around you, pulling the hood on beforehand.

Just as you stepped foot out, a smile grew on your lips as you watched the small bits fall down sporadically—beautifully. You had never seen anything like it. The way they trickled, swayed in the wind and collided with the ground... It was breathtaking.

Looking up at the grey skies, watching the snow fall as you reached out to catch a few flakes, you chuckled as you twirled around, feeling like a child all over again, discovering something so stunning and simple as nature.

Treading with long strides across the halls and over to the throne room, ready for what the day had to offer—let alone, demand—Kylo held his fists right by his sides as his cape billowed around his feet. His steps were precise, his focus was set, and his mind was settled... but something caught him off guard. Something caught his attention...

Within the Force?

Coming to a sudden stop as his boots echoed throughout the tall walls, he turned his head to the left ever so slowly—eyes first—before narrowing them. Something was reaching out to him, but what?

Turning his whole body, eyeing the outside snow through the red, mosaic glass, Kylo took small steps forward, then stopped at the window.

There you were, just beneath the hall he was in, twirling in the snow with your dress circling your ankles and flowing with the wind. You had your arms spread out and head tilted back with a... wide grin? Why were you so happy? It was just snow!

But then, his eyes trailed along to the entrance of the terrace... and there stood a stormtrooper watching you, arms loose at their sides as their head fell back as if in laughter. Kylo's teeth gritted a she snarled, the heat moving through his body making it to his face as he tightened his fists.

He was angry. He hated the idea of his own troopers slacking because some _princess_ was out having fun. He fumed at the sight of you, acting so carefree and careless. This was a _palace_! A place of politics and decision making! A place for _adults_! Not children!

Huffing, Kylo rushed along, nearly sprinting with how fast his steps were. He could feel his blood boil as his heart echoed within his head. His fists clenching and unclenching. The smoke leaving his ears like a roaring freighter vessel's engine.

How dare you have a good time with some stormtrooper?!

How dare you!

Waving his hand furiously in the air as the doors slammed open, Kylo stormed out and suddenly found no one. No one on the terrace. Where could you have possibly gone in such a short period of time?

Eyeing his surroundings, heavily breathing, grinding his teeth, he looked down and saw a trail of footsteps leading to the forest. You must've been so foolish to think you could disobey any order given to stay inside. Let alone, the trooper watching you must've been a complete imbecile to defy the Captain.

Following the footsteps, lowly growling like a rabid animal, waving his hand furiously to force any branches from blocking his path, he heard a sudden giggle and froze in his spot as his heart had done the same.

With wide eyes, he heard it again... And then again. And his heart sank.

"Shh... This is a big risk as it is being out here!"

"Oh, please, what will the Supreme Leader do? He won't even know! He's too busy being judgmental!" That was your voice, Kylo recognized it. "He wouldn't even care. I'm sure if he knew, he would hope that some wild animal would snatch me away... Or that a branch would fall on my head."

"Well, unlucky for him, I wouldn't let that happen."

"Thank you, Daniel. But, truly, you can't stop a branch from smashing me like a bug." _Daniel?_ Kylo thought. _Who is Daniel?!_

"I could always push you, princess."

Hearing a sudden silence, Kylo's eyes widened once again. Had something happened? Sneaking behind a tree and looking over, he watched as you smiled up at the stormtrooper, bowing your head and thanking him. Why were you suddenly so happy? Why were you smiling?!

"I think it's best we go back in."

"Nonsense, no one is looking for me. I have way too much free time. Plus... I am not willing to be cooped up all day in my room."

"I understand, but I could lose my position here. Which means you would no longer see me..." _No longer see him?!_ Kylo shrieked in his mind. _Is she with him?!_

"Oh, I'm sure we'd make a compromise." Were you flirting? So casually? Why were you flirting?!

"I rather we avoid it than make a compromise, princess. I would like to get to know you better."

"Me? Surely there's not much to brag about."

"There _has_ to be! There has got to be something. You are very interesting, I would like to learn more."

"Hmm... Well... I don't know..."

Glaring his eyes, watching how the two of you interacted so smoothly and easily, as if being friends for years, Kylo bit his tongue. His heart was racing so fast and his face was on fire. He had never felt anger in this manner before. In a manner that his heart was too loud for his own thoughts.

"Anything, really!"

"Alright!" Hearing your life, Kylo's breath got caught—as did his focus. "Let's see... I have a little brother who admired me."

"Really?"

"Mhm! I miss him dearly... He was my world. I didn't have much friends, not many wanted to associate with me... Never knew as to why, always believed it was because I was a princess and they were jealous... But my brother made friends just fine and so did the other royal families..."

Feeling something harshly stab his chest as his eyebrows narrowed, Kylo squinted his eyes.

"I hardly had friends... Just my brother, my books, and all my hobbies. I, too, had my parents... But that didn't last. As you can see."

"I truly am sorry..."

"It is of no importance. This is for the people. For my home planet. I understand these circumstances. I understand the sacrifices that need to be made. I will never love Kylo Ren, but I will marry him and I will try to understand him... as much as I can. I will make a compromise. I won't let him or the marriage bring my confidence down."

Feeling the jab once again, Kylo's breath got caught at your words. It was meaningless. Your words meant nothing to him! Yet... he felt so... oddly hearing them. As if... he felt something other than annoyance and hate.

"You are a true wonder, princess. I have faith in you. You will succeed."

"Thank you, Daniel. I truly hope so. After all... one can only handle so much of Kylo Ren. I will fight for all that is right to make him see that there is more to love than to hate."

"I thought you weren't here to fix him?"

"I'm not. But he needs to open his eyes. There is more to life than to hate and hide." _What?! I am not hiding!_ Kylo mentally shouted. "He's just a frightened boy, that's all."

Frightened boy? Him? You hardly even knew him! How could you know?! He was the _Supreme Leader_. He was the one who ran it all. And he was the one who now held your life in his hands.

It would only be wise if you became hyper aware of all that was around you... Kylo was not going to let you slip so easily.


	5. Solitude

**Small** laughs echoed throughout the walls as you tried containing yourself. With a hand over your mouth and tears in your eyes, you trembled. You knew the palace was too quiet for a giggling princess like you, but, you couldn't help it... You had great company beside you.

"I don't know how you got snow in my armor." Daniel shook his head, helmet in his hand as his other banged against it. "I'm surprised the snowball didn't have a pebble in it."

"Oh, don't be so sensitive." You teased while shaking your head, waving a hand dismissively. "I'm even amazed I got you good! It pays to be distracted." You winked at him, looking ahead, only to stop.

"What—" Stopping in his tracks as well, Daniel quickly put his helmet back on and eyed the pair of Knights of Ren standing just before your chamber's door. "What is this about?"

"You are relieved from you duty. You will return to your previous post. The princess is under our watch now." One of the knights spoke as you blinked in disbelief.

"Wh— What's the matter? Why is—"

"It's the Supreme Leader's order's. You do not question the Supreme Leader." The other hissed as your heart sank. "You will be in your chambers and only in your chambers."

"I— I don't understand? Why am I being held in my room like a—"

"You do not question the Supreme Leader." The same knight repeated, agitated.

Sucking in a shaky breath, mood falling as your heart had, Daniel placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder. "All is well." He muttered to you as you watched the door to your room open.

Gulping, seeing the knights step to a side, you looked up at Daniel who gave you a nod before nudging his head. Giving him a small nod back, frowning, you turned and walked into your room, suddenly hearing the door shut behind you.

Turning to face it, you walked over and heard Daniel's footsteps descend.

So this was how it was going to be? Locked up in your chambers for, what? Days? Weeks? Until the wedding? Your stomach turned as you covered your mouth. Was _he_ really going to keep you there like a hostage? What had you done _now_?  
  
  
  


**Kylo** seethed. His throne was left to himself as he paced before it. No one else was allowed inside. How could you be so foolish to think you could go around having fun in _his_ palace?! Let alone, brainwash a stormtrooper to join you?!

And how could you get so close to a trooper you had just met?!

He was raging. His face was on fire as his fists clenched and unclenched, heavy stomping echoing throughout the tall walls as he huffed. Why was he so upset about the situation? Why was he overreacting?

At least, to him it wasn't overreacting. It was how he normally reacted when things weren't going his way. Or... when things weren't going as they _should_.

Taking in deep breaths, jaw tight as his eyes squinted, almost as if he were watching the scene unravel before him, Kylo threw his head back and screamed as loud as his lungs allowed him to—nothing new, Kylo had the habit of yelling randomly at nothing. But this time, this time he was yelling over a _princess_ and a _stormtrooper_. Something no one else knew about.

Swinging in his spot, feeling lightheaded as his veins nearly popped, Kylo held his face in his palms and breathed. Breathed _loudly_. He had no time to worry about a damn princess. No time to worry about a stromtroooer falling in love with his future wife. No time at all for foolish matters.

That's why he locked you away, right?

"Right." He hissed, dropping his hands and storming towards the steps of his throne. He was the Supreme Leader of the First Order, not the Supreme Leader of Keeping Horny Troopers and Flirtatious Princesses in Line!

Falling with a grunt on his throne, Kylo stared ahead at the massive doors. He knew he couldn't lock you away forever. You'd find your way out.

You'd find your way out and he couldn't have that.

What if you had escaped already? What if you were clever enough to seduce his own knights?

What if—  
  
  
  


**Snowfall** was equivalent to the oceans waves for you. All you had was snow and nothing else to look at as you sat by the window. What were you supposed to do now that you were trapped in your own _home_?

Rolling your eyes and leaning your head back, you sighed. The Supreme Leader surely had not one single nice bone in his body. Which made you think, were your ribs okay? You had totally forgotten after being distracted by Daniel to even check.

Removing your cloak and settling it before you, you reached back and unzipped the dress, allowing it to fall from your shoulders and down to your hips as you eyed your ribs.

To your luck, they weren't bruised, but slightly red. You were positive that his grip was deadly on you... or maybe you were too shocked to actually realize how lose his grip truly was?

Gently brushing your fingertips against your ribs, sucking in a small breath as you did so, feeling the smooth skin, you nearly jumped in your spot as you heard the door open with a sudden huff.

"You!"

Looking over, gasping, you quickly covered your chest with your arms as your wide eyes stared right into those of the Supreme Leader's.

With an accusing finger in the air and a heaving chest, Kylo's heart suddenly fell out of his chest at the sight of you, sitting there with your dress at your hips and your arms crossed over your bare chest.

If he weren't so caught up in his rage moments before, he would've painted the picture of what he truly saw when he walked in, and now he couldn't seem to get the image out of his mind—nor sight.

"Supreme Leader, the princess has been here the entire time." One of the knights spoke over to their paranoid master.

Blinking a few times, silently gulping as his finger stayed in the air, he watched your body tremble as your bottom lip quivered. "Don't think for a second you can sneak out of here!" He forced out, heart slinging back into his chest, racing.

Nearly panting, yourself, you shook your head as you couldn't seem to look away. If you were fully aware of his expressions, you would've said the pale man before you was blushing. After all, what else would explain those rosy cheeks?

"Hmph!" At the grunt that rumbled within his throat, and a small—nearly discreet—scan of your sitting body, Kylo turned on his heel and stormed out as the door closed.

Pulling your dress back up, not bothering to zip it, you leaned back in your spot. Had he... seen everything? Or maybe he was weirded out by the fact that you were sitting like that? It was his fault in the end, he didn't have to grab you like that!

Huffing as you crossed your arms, looking out the window once again, your face began to burn. Why was it? It wasn't like this man would soon see your whole body in its bare form... _Well, he will_. At the thought, your face felt on fire. No one had seen you naked before, only your handmaidens—and basically your personal droid—but no one else. Of course the thought of the Supreme Leader seeing your bare chest was stomach turning. After all, most of your gowns didn't require a bra... you hardly ever wore one... _Great_.

Standing up from your seat, searching for something to entertain yourself with, you scanned shelves and pulled open drawers, only to stop on one that sat parallel to your bed.

A calligraphy set. Or so you believed it to be.

You pulled out the small, wooden box that had collected dust, as well as the scroll sitting beside it. Settling both on the table, you zipped up your gown and removed the leather string that held it together, letting it roll open.

For a moment, you stilled in your spot. Eyes scanning the beige paper as black ink had already encompassed the top left of the scroll. A word written in Aurebesh: _starlight_.

Feeling your heart skip a beat as your breath hitched, you blinked a few times in hopes it was just your imagination... But, it wasn't. The words were there. Dried and stamped onto the rough paper. Had you been imagining it? Maybe you were dreaming and didn't realize it?

Shaking the newfound feeling away, you sucked in a small breath and set up the ink and pen, settling at the table and writing away.

You weren't entirely sure what you were writing, seeing as your mind was in a world of its own, but the words had spilled so fluidly. So easily. As if you were gushing away your feelings.

You were hypnotized, the way the letters formed the words, how the ink bled to the way the paper crinkled underneath your forearm. You had written all along the entire paper, only to stop as you reached its end.

Sucking in a breath and looking back at it, you sighed. Settling the pen and standing up, your eyes quickly scanned the words you had printed, not realizing you had written something... far off from what you were truly feeling.

You wrote about love.

About affection.

The power of adoration and admiration.

Furrowing your eyebrows, you shook your head and rolled it up, not bothering to reread it thoroughly. Now wasn't the time to be gushy over nothing. You were locked up in "your" own room, too devastated and solemn to think about... _love_.

Love... something you weren't supposed to have forced upon yourself. You weren't going to find love in an arranged marriage. Not when the man had locked you up for no good reason.

Not realizing how much time had passed, with all the writing and thinking, you heard a knock at your door as you snapped out of your thoughts. "Come in." You called out, instantly hearing the door open as your personal droid walked in. "Oh, hello Low."

"Princess." The droid acknowledged you as you kindly smiled its way. "I have brought your lunch, dinner will also be served here as the Supreme Leader has stated that he has suddenly fallen ill."

Narrowing your eyebrows, you tilted your head. You nearly dismissed the matter of dinner, completely focused on the words _fallen ill_. The man seemed completely fine around you, not showing any change—except for the fact that he had nearly seen you naked. But you were sure that was nothing to him, he's seen much more traumatizing things than a woman's chest. "Ill?"

"Yes... I am unsure as to what, but he is not at his throne. I believe it is just the weather." The droid spoke as you sucked in a small breath and nodded. "I will place your lunch over here." Pushing a hover cart towards the couch and near the coffee table, Low had set up the dishes before walking away and bowing once more, saying "enjoy" before leaving you to be.

Turning your focus away from the droid, and towards the food, you quietly walked over as you held your hands together, eyeing the food and hearing your stomach grumble. Sure, you were hungry, but for some reason, Kylo Ren falling ill had taken over your mind.

 

 

 

 **Kylo** **Ren** had lied, told nearly every one around him that he had fallen sick. A stomach bug, food poisoning, a sudden cold—whatever it was that was easy enough for one man to handle and care for. He didn't need the medical droids rushing around or any doctors worrying. He just needed time to himself. For some twisted reason, he couldn't get the sight of your breasts off of his mind. It was there, imprinted, in all its glory. Making him bothered.

His face was burning and, for a palace that was always cold, he felt hot. His robes were too much, his body was on fire and he couldn't stand how tight his pants felt on him. He was panting, why was he panting? It wasn't like he had been training or was in the middle of a battle... although it felt like it. 

Shoving his cape off and peeling off his clothes, down to just his pants and boots, Kylo groaned in discomfort. His pants were too tight. Why was he so turned on all of a sudden? Nearly nothing ever got him this riled up... except, maybe after winning a battle. But even then, he never felt so... eager. 

His heart was racing within his ears as his lips parted, heavy breaths slipping out as he leaned his forehead against the wall. He needed to get over himself, to calm down, to find peace within his damn pants before returning to his duties. But all Kylo could see every single time he closed his eyes were your forsaken breasts!

He didn't have time for this, didn't have time for being aroused, didn't have time to act like he was sick because he had a hard on just by the sight—and simple thought—of your bare chest. Yet, here Kylo Ren was, unable to contain himself, unbuttoning and unzipping his pants and pulling his length out. When the hell was the last time he had masturbated? As a Supreme Leader, he hardly had time to even think about such things, yet now he was locked up in his chambers, using his own spit as a lubricant and bitting his glove to muffle out his moans. He couldn't handle it, he was making sounds that were very unlike him. They sounded desperate and flat out _sad_... and with the filthy noises his hand movements were making, he only shut his eyes in disappointment in himself. Was this the payment of practically being celibate?

Tightening his grip around himself, jerking his hips against his own hand as his moans grew louder, Kylo felt tears pricking his eyes. It had been too long, way too long since he last touched himself and his own body was getting payback against himself. 

"K— Kriff!" Feeling a tear slip down his cheek as he threw his head back, he squeezed his eyes shut as he imagined your breasts all over again... Again, and again, until he came all over his hand and fell to his knees in embarrassment. What were you doing to him?


	6. The Study

**Five** days had passed since you had been locked up in your own personal quarters... which left you with a week worth of you living in the palace of the Supreme Leader. The man you hadn't seen since he had barged into your room. You hadn't even heard word of him, almost as if he was non existent. You wondered if he was still the Supreme Leader... after all, how would you know? You were stuck in that wretched room for so long, only seeing the outside whenever the door was opened.

You needed to get out, all days blended together and it almost felt like you were there for months and not just one insanely long week. You ate your three meals in there, had to entertain yourself somehow, and the only company you had gotten was from Low. You hadn't even seen Daniel and you were wondering if you had been forgotten by him. He must've been put to a very busy task so he wouldn't dare try visiting you. As if the knights would allow him to.

Sitting once again on the window sill, watching the snow fall as you snuggled into your cloak, wondering whether or not to nap to make time pass by, your door was suddenly opened. "Princess."

Looking up, seeing one of the knights standing there, you stood from your spot and treaded over to them. "Yes?"

"You have been granted one hour out of your confines—" Gasping at that as you smiled, the knight cleared their throat, "with _us_ watching closely behind."

"Really?" You nearly shrieked as they nodded. "Oh, how lovely! I would like to see the snow."

Standing silently for a moment, the knight breathed. "Are you sure about your request?"

"Mhm." You eagerly nodded.

"As you wish." Stepping to a side, you eyed them momentarily before walking right out, grinning and holding in your excitement. Finally, some freedom. You wondered how much longer you'd last in there.

Aiming towards the terrace as the pair of knights followed, a stormtrooper off in the distance halted as they spotted you. "Princess?"

Looking over, you tilted your head, only to grow wide eyed. "Daniel?!" You gasped, rushing over and engulfing him in a _not so comfortable_ hug.

"You're alive." He teased, awkwardly patting your back, knowing very well the knights were watching.

"Of course I am, confinement cant kill me." You smirked, shaking your head. "Well... unless I lose my mind, but, so far... I'm doing fine." You smiled up at him, looking through the visor of his helmet where his eyes would be.

"You look fine and that's what matters." He nodded as you nodded back.

"Thank you." You lowly spoke, eyes trailing elsewhere only to look back up. "This is a very... odd question but, have you seen the Supreme Leader?"

Standing silently for moment, for you imagined the questioned had caught him off guard, Daniel spoke up, "Have you not?"

"No..." You shook your head. "Not for five days." Not since he had seen your _bare chest_.

"Where I'm stationed, he hardly comes around, so I really can't say yes... but I've heard of others speaking about him. Apparently his stomach has become very sensitive as of late? Rumor has it he's being slowly poisoned with how many times he had to walk out from meetings and other important matters because of his stomach..."

Blinking a few times as you listened in on Daniel, your lips parted. You weren't concerned, were you? No... you couldn't be. But, who would poison him? Surely you weren't that cruel even though you were forced to marry him... "Has— Has it been daily?"

"Supposedly." Daniel nodded. "Easily once a day. But, then again, rumors. I am not sure if it is true or not..."

Thinking about what Low had said the first day you were locked up, your lips parted. Maybe it was true, maybe that's why you hadn't seen him in so long. Was someone trying to kill him? "That— I... Thank you for telling me this."

"Of course." Daniel bowed his head. "Like I said, these are rumors. Could be false and the man is just taking a temporary leave. The Supreme Leader must be overwhelmed, no doubt."

"Right..." You nodded, only to hear someone clear their throat.

"The time is ticking, princess." One of the knights spoke as you looked over and sighed. Nodding your head in acknowledgment. "You haven't got all day."

Looking back over at Daniel, you gave him a half smile. "I must go. It was lovely seeing you." You said, patting his chest's armor before turning and walking off.

"Likewise, my princess." He called out as you sucked in a small breath, nearly stopping in your tracks but continuously walking. You truly had missed Daniel.   
  
  
  


**How** long was Kylo Ren going to keep up the act? Constantly lying about his false stomach issue just so he could hideaway from meetings and... masturbate? This is why he hadn't done it in so long, because he knew he'd grow dependent. Find some relieve in it. Look forward to it. Oh, how _pathetic_ he felt.

All over a pair of breasts.

How pitiful he was.

Pacing around his quarters, trying to ease his mind away from the itching desire to touch himself at least once, he stopped dead in his tracks as he suddenly snapped his head over to the window.

Walking over and peeking out, his heart suddenly picked up its pace and grew loud in its wake. You were there, reaching out for snow and twirling within it. Looking like an absolute princess, because... well, you were one.

His heart rate grew faster as he looked down at you, focusing on your bright smile, almost as if you were a child playing with their favorite toy. How foolish of you! It was just snow, nothing fascinating!

Yet, there Kylo was, watching you with a pounding heart and heavy breathing as his pants grew tight. Though he couldn't see a lick of your cleavage with the thick cloak you wore over yourself, his dark mind imagined it there in his eyes path and he couldn't stop himself from mewling. What a pathetic vessel he had become. All worked up over a woman's chest.

No one ever made him feel this way! Ever! Even if he had lost his _virginity_ and had his first kiss, it was all useless and tasteless. For some odd reason, he felt more from the thought of your breasts and rubbing one out than his actual experience.

Why must he marry you? You were going to make his life a living hell.

And, wasn't he going to see you full on naked on his wedding night?

The thought made him so weak in the knees, he fell to them with a thud while panting. He was a disaster of a man, so weak and full of lust. The Supreme Leader hated himself for this. This was very much _unlike_ him. It was going to reach a point that he'd rub himself completely raw until he felt nothing and truly felt the weight of his actions.

You were poison to him and staying away from you clearly wasn't doing him any justice.  
  
  
  


 **Resting** on the snow and basking in the sun, feeling its faint warmth as you lied there, you smiled to yourself. You had nearly forgotten about the world around you, about the arranged marriage and living far from home. Nature has consumed you with its beauty, beauty you weren't quite accustomed to, and you welcomed it.

Caught up in the bliss of things, you hadn't heard the snow crunch to reveal that someone was approaching you and now standing there. The moment your eyes had opened, you heart skipped a beat at the sight of someone—the Supreme Leader—blocking the sun from shining down on you.

Looking down at you as your hair fanned around your head on the snow, Kylo bit down. "Come with me." He demanded, turning away as you slowly sat up before standing, following the tall man back into the palace.

So, he was alive. You wonder if the rumors were true... and, if so, you wondered if he was okay. Sure, you weren't the biggest fan of him, you truly hoped all was well.

"Is your stomach well?" You asked as he suddenly came to a stop. It was just the two of you now, you not realizing the knights were now gone.

" _What_?" The Supreme Leader spat as he looked over his shoulder.

"Are you feeling better? I was informed that you were falling ill at the stomach..." You trailed, heart skipping a beat... Maybe it was a secret you weren't supposed to know?

Gulping, Kylo clenched his shaky fists before responding. "I'm _fine_." _Lie_. Why else would he speak with his back facing you? He knew if he looked you in the eye, he wouldn't be able to say those two words so easily. You had those _foolish_ , soft eyes.

"I'm glad." You nodded with a small smile, Kylo suddenly spinning on his heel and looking down at you.

For a moment, he swore he was about to snap, but looking into your doe eyes as you lifted your head to meet his glare, his chest caved in as his shoulders fell. " _Hmph_."

Watching the man abruptly turn around, continuing his path, you sucked in a breath before following. He truly did not like any form of kindness.

Avoiding any sort of small talk with the Supreme Leader, seeing as it was not his forte, you kept silent. The only sound you heard were your heels and his boots echo along the long halls and tall walls as he lead you to wherever it was he had to take you.

Eyeing your surroundings, realizing you hardly saw paintings or any sort of decor, you let out a small breath. Maybe... just maybe, if you were going to be the empress, they'd let you redecorate just a tad. Right?

Slowing your pace as Kylo had waved a hand for a pair of doors to open, you blinked a few times as you eyed the room. The insanely vast study.

It was in the same colors as everything else, except, with the vast amounts of bookshelves and easels filled with used and unused canvases, it add much life to the room. Everywhere you looked, there was something—red, cushioned seats, a circular couch filled with pillows right in the middle, even a table filled with all sorts of calligraphy sets—your heart swelled up.

Looking up at the high ceiling, your eyes widened as you realized the roof was nothing but windows. All sorts of light reaching through as snow coated certain dips and crevices.

"This is beautiful..." You let out, not realizing you had been vocalizing your thoughts.

"You will _only_ have access to this room if and when you would like to leave your chambers." The Supreme Leader said, voice thundering around the room as you shivered. His voice was even more powerful in the study than it was naturally. "No one else is allowed in here. No one beside myself, so appreciate this, _girl_."

Lowering your focus and nodding, your heart skipped a beat as his words repeated themselves in your head. No one else besides himself was allowed in there? Did this mean he was the one who used the unfinished canvases? Read all those books and... wrote with a calligraphy set?

No way, this must've been where those assigned to the task left their tools. That had to be it. The Supreme Leader of the First Order, with a creative bone in his body? That was unheard of.

"Thank you." You faintly spoke, wanting to smile at his somewhat kind gesture, but not wanting to scare him off.

"You'll have more fun in here than out there in the wretched snow." The man snarled as he stormed past you, all the way towards the doors you came from. "That way, you won't get sick for being an utter fool." Hearing the door slam, you looked over and saw that he was gone.

So, he cared for your well being more than he liked to admit?


	7. Paintings

**The Supreme**  Leader's heart raced within his chest as he sucked in a deep breath. Why did he show you his private study? Why did he bring you there? That was for him and only him! He was about ready to turn on his heel, storm back into the room and demand you leave... But how much of a fool would that make him seem to be if he wasn't one already?

And why did he care about you're opinion?!

"AGH!" He shouted into the dead hall, fists clenched as he hunched forward. Kylo wanted to keep you close, but he also wanted his distance. He needed you near even if he didn't want to admit it. He couldn't keep you locked up forever! You were to be his wife, it wasn't like anyone else could steal you away... Wait, why was he worrying about  _that_?

Storming off and nearly leaving smoke in his wake, a stormtrooper popped up from around a corner as the Supreme Leader had completely missed him—too lost in his mind to even realize he wasn't alone.

Quietly walking down the hall and up to the door, he pressed the  _open_  button. Peeking into the room as his eyebrows lifted from within his helmet, his jaw fell open. There was plenty he hadn't seen from within the palace... but this was very unexpected.

Standing before a row of canvases, sifting through them, your eyebrows furrowed. They all looked quite similar: a pair of figures held close together, most being silhouettes while others were their backsides.

Something about them felt familiar, as if you had seen the paintings before. Especially the one that was now in your hands. A very dark one, almost as if the scenery was set at night time. The two figures stood far apart, just outside the moons wake.

_"Moondust?"_

"Princess?"

Snapping out of your thoughts as your mind had fallen into a trance, you lowered the painting and turned, seeing a stormtrooper standing there. "Daniel?" With a wide grin as the trooper nodded, you rushed forward and pulled him into an embrace. "How did you find me?"

Hugging you back, Daniel pulled away as he removed his helmet to speak. "I will be honest, I saw the two of you—you and the Supreme Leader—and I couldn't help but follow. After all... You don't see the man escorting a lovely woman away. It's quite... strange."

Smiling while shaking your head, you crossed your arms. "That sounds quite a lot like stalking, Daniel."

"Not entirely when I am looking out for the princess." He winked as you playfully rolled your eyes. "Speaking of which... Do you mind if I spend my break with you?" Daniel asked as your eyebrows lifted. You could use the company.

"Not at all!" You smiled. "But, just so you know, you shouldn't be here. This is the Supreme Leaders private study."

"Well, what about you?" He teased.

"Clearly, I am the  _only_  lucky one allowed here." You winked.

Grinning, Daniel sighed. "Your secret is safe with me. No one will know I was here."  
  
  
  
  


 **A few**  hours had passed since Kylo had left you in the private study. He expected you to busy yourself with something in there, seeing as there was plenty of reading and... activities. He assumed you spent the time in there rather than being elsewhere. And when he heard your voice, he assumed right.

That is until he heard a second voice. A much deeper one.

Inching closer and closer, Kylo's jaw tightened as he heard your laugh followed by a few shared words. You were supposed to be alone! No one else was supposed to know about—let alone be in—that room! How could you break his trust?!

Yet, with all the fury burning his skin, Kylo couldn't seem to make a move. He stood there, frozen in his rage. Why?

Backing up as he snarled, Kylo trudged off. He'd send the same pair of knights for you instead. For once, he wasn't willing to commit any sort of homicide... Especially in front of you.

"Oh, it's been three hours!" You exclaimed as Daniel shrugged.

"Luckily, my post isn't anything out of the ordinary. I surely won't be in any trouble." He waved a hand as you lifted your eyebrows. This Daniel was much different than the Daniel you met the first day... "If anything, I could—"

Hearing the door open, you gasped, shoving Daniel behind a curtain that was draped over a window. Luckily, his helmet was on the ground, seeming as if it were a prop or a simple still life for a painting.

"Princess." Eyeing the pair of knights that walked in, you nodded, knowing very well your time was up.

"Right, of course." Walking towards the two, you gave the room one last look, over to the curtains, then left it's boundaries. 

Hearing the door close, Daniel peeked out before leaving the curtains confines, aiming for his helmet and grabbing it. Just as he was about to place his helmet on, exiting the study, he froze in his spot as the looming figure before him appeared out of nowhere. His heart came to a sudden stop as he eyed the man before him, somehow towering him, especially with the cloud of darkness he held around him.

" _You_." Kylo snarled as Daniel sucked in a small breath. "What are your plans with the princess?" He asked, teeth tight as his fists were balled up once again.

"Supreme Leader, sir, I am just watching over her... Giving her company. Being her friend." Daniel truthfully spoke.

Glaring, Kylo felt his eye twitch. "She needs no friends when she has  _me_." He snapped. "Stormtroopers are not here to  _make friends_."

"Well, Supreme Leader, then maybe her only friend should give her the attention she deserves rather than scare her off for others to find." Daniel suggested as Kylo's eyes suddenly grew in size.

He could feel the anger boil within his blood as his head began to pound, the sudden rage that resurfaced as he stared at Daniel with such distaste. He could kill him. Kylo could kill the man right there and then, and no one would know.

But, of course, Daniel was quick to leave. Smart enough to leave the Supreme Leaders reach before he could catch him in his grip or slam him against a wall. Daniel knew he struck a nerve, and with the small grin on his lips, he was pleased.

Panting in his spot, opening and closing his fists, the lights began to flicker above and before Kylo as his heart sounded within his ears.

"Thank you." Bowing your head towards the two knights, your attention was caught by the flickering lights as the duo, too, caught it. "Is that normal?"

Letting out a faint sigh, almost as if the two knew it was their master, they quietly nodded. "Very normal."

Blinking, you looked back down to see the pair walk out as the door had shut, leaving you with a muddled expression before brushing it off and deciding to freshen up.

Undressing as you had set up the water to a perfect temperature, your body suddenly felt hot as the lights flickered once again. Sighing, you fanned yourself before entering the refresher, in hopes you could clear your mind—and the heat—from your body.

Losing track of time as you got lost in your own world, you eventually readied yourself for dinner. In the midst of doing your hair and setting it in one of your many intricate hairdos, you heard a sudden knock on your door before it opened. Whoever it was, not bothering to wait for you to allow them in.

Stepping away from the mirror and slipping your feet into your shoes, you lifted your head. Holding in a gasp as your eyes widened momentarily, your heart skipped a beat. There was something in the Supreme Leader's eyes that you hadn't seen before. It wasn't anger, nor was it entirely passion... It was something else all together that you couldn't decipher.

Staring at one another, Kylo extended his folded arm towards you as your eyes slowly trailed down to meet it. A gesture much unlike him, but you understood it and took it. Kylo was...gentler. He lead the way and kept his arm folded for you to hold. The second either of you made it to the dining hall—in which the knights had opened—you were thrown back by the sight that... no one was there. No one but you and Kylo in the vast room.

Eyeing the table and seeing either end was set up for the two of you, a distance in between, Kylo lead you to your seat as you had let go. Pulling your chair back, you sat down the moment Kylo did so, only to grunt when he pushed in the chair a little too much.

Looking up and seeing him with wide eyes, he turned and walked off with a small hunch in his back as you blinked. The second Kylo took his seat across from you, he slumped in his chair as he kept his focus low. You knew this look. He was embarrassed. After all, you had seen it in plenty of men who had never been on dates before but were put on one with you.

Growing wide eyed at the sudden connection, you sat up—was this a date? Did the Supreme Leader even go on dates? After all... the two of you would soon be married.

Everything was silent, minus the distant sounds of the snow falling and the occasional dishes clacking whenever a servant came by to place or take away the plates. You ate in silence, studying the architecture and interior design of the dining hall. It reminded you much of the throne room, but less... dramatic. Still, one of the few sights in the palace (so far) that was breathtaking. Much different than the halls and your chambers.

Lifting his focus on the occasion, Kylo slowed his pace on scarfing down his meal as his attention settled on you. You were in a gaze, eyeing your surroundings while casually eating. Not making a single mess, not spilling a drop or even dirtying your face in someway... unlike him. Kylo was no royal man, he was quite the savage—he knew that. Probably why his spoon missed his mouth as he stared at you, spilling it contents on his lap as he cursed.

Shifting your eyes to Kylo, seeing him looking down and grumbling to himself, a pair of droids rushed over to his side. Had something happened?

"Sir, allow us to—"

"I'm fine!" Kylo snarled.

"Sir, we can—"

"I said I'm fine!" He shouted, refusing to even acknowledge the fact that you were there, watching.

Kylo's face flushed with heat as he rapidly cleaned himself up, cursing himself for being a klutz and cursing you for snatching his focus. A mumble that you can't seem to hear from the distance between the two of you.

Lifting your glass of wine to your lips, watching Kylo as he keeps his focus low, arms roughly moving beneath the table and looking like an obscene gesture, you stayed silent. You couldn't help but smile, Kylo seemed so irritated. So  _flustered_. 

And he felt like a fool for that. The heat never left his face as he sat there, gritting his teeth, embarrassed by the fact that some  _princess_  made him spill his food on his damn pants (unintentionally, but he'd never admit that).

Lifting his eyes for a moment and meeting yours, your smile grew the slightest as his heart skipped a beat, instantly looking away as he huffed. He didn't need your wretched smile.

After half an hour of this, dessert came in and the two of you were still silent as ever.

"Calidum." The Supreme Leader's voice spoke up, catching your attention.

Eyeing him in utter confusion, Kylo leaned in the slightest and gave you a look, as if gesturing for you to speak about the topic. "Oh..." Your eyes widened as you responded. "The weather is quite beautiful. One of the loveliest to experience. It can be sunny and warm, and the afternoon showers always bring in the coolest of breezes that make the atmosphere so breathable and—"

"If I wanted the weather I would look it up on my holo pad." Kylo interjected. "What did you like about it? What did you enjoy?" He insisted as you blinked, amazed in the question.

"Oh, there's so much..." You shook your head with a small grin, thinking about home. "I loved the thunderstorms. The gloom of it didn't bring sadness, rather, closeness. I loved staying in, cozied up and watch my favorite holo-drama or comedy. Sometimes I'd sketch out the incoming storm as it approaches the ocean outside my... old bedroom's window." You softly smiled, remembering the sight and feel of it. "The cool breezes that would follow, when the sun would be exposed as the plants blossomed... It was absolutely breathtaking."

Watching you speak with such enthusiasm caused Kylo's heart to flutter. He couldn't quite recall the last time speaking to someone about something so passionately... that had nothing to do with the First Order. Yet, here you were, gushing about nature. "Do you hate the weather here?"

"Of course not." You shook your head. "Although different from what I'm used to... I like different. My body isn't used to it. I freeze quite easily and it keeps me up at night, but I try to make a compromise by wearing my cloak to bed. The snow truly is beautiful to experience." You smiled.

Eyeing you as he took in a deep breath, Kylo leaned back; he would have to keep in mind that you were... fragile and froze easily by the bases' weather conditions. Which made him wonder, your home must've been warm every season it had, something he wasn't quite used to... Maybe he needed to visit Calidum at least once, but he would never tell you that. He was not going to let you have any instance of believing that he had a soft spot for you.

When he  _didn't_.


	8. Terrace

**Silence** was something you associated with the Supreme Leader. No matter what, he was silent, and if he wasn't... well, it was better off that he was silent. And it was silent now between the two of you.

You were surprised he even bothered to walk you back to your chambers rather than get his knights or a trooper to do it. Maybe he was opening up to you... somewhat. After all, he actually asked you about your home planet and you were sure that was enough coming out of him.

Slowing down as you approached your chamber's door, you sucked in a small breath before turning to face him, neck craning as you looked up at him with a gentle smile. "Thank you for dinner and asking how I feel."

Blinking, Kylo gulped. When had he asked if you were okay? All he asked about was your home and— The base. Of course, you took it the wrong way! It was just a simple question, nothing more! "That..." Unable to finish his sentence as his heart raced, Kylo's jaw tightened as he stared at you, the silence once again looming over the two of you.

Taking in a deep breath through your nose, you couldn't help but stare back at Kylo, eyes not daring to drift—that is until you looked deeply into his irises and found color. Golden brown? They were much lighter than what the normally were to you. Practically black. But now that you eyed him, it was hard to miss.

There was something there that you couldn't pinpoint. Something different in the atmosphere and his aura, and you hoped you weren't reading things wrong. Had something snapped within him? Was he finally seeing that there was more to life than constantly being brooding?

Kylo slowly leaned in as your heart skipped a beat, eyes fluttering for a moment, bracing yourself... only to hear a faint _goodnight_ before Kylo turned and rushed off.

"What?" You muttered as he disappeared from your sight, you blinking a few times, unsure as to what happened. Did he just run away?

Storming into his quarters, swatting his hand so his cape would fly off of him and right onto his chair, Kylo felt the embarrassment rush through his body as he clenched his fists and yelled as loud as he could.

What the hell was he even thinking?! Why did he lean into you?! It was those damn eyes of yours, they were mesmerizing! They reeled him in and he fell for the wretched bait.

Haphazardly undressing, cursing underneath his breath as he tossed himself on his bed, Kylo shoved his face into one of his pillows and yelled until his voice went hoarse. Somehow, it had put him to sleep, his throat giving out—as did his body.

Although he was exhausted, he found himself tossing and turning, mind in a whirlwind about you. Your damn face and it's soft complexity... Your eyes that had him hypnotized...

And then, Daniel's words came to mind.

_Well, Supreme Leader, then maybe her only friend should give her the attention she deserves rather than scare her off for others to find._

Tightening his fists around his sheets, Kylo tossed and turned once again until he finally fell back asleep.   
  
  
  


**In the distance** , stood himself. He was before someone, someone much shorter than his towering height. Kylo watched as his own hand reached out and caressed the blurred woman's hair, soft mutters not reaching his ears but knowing there was something being said. Stepping closer, Kylo's eyes narrowed as he drew out what he—his distant self—wore. Not his normal attire but his... Jedi robes?

Blinking, Kylo leaned his head in and realized the woman he was with wore an oversized cloak, much too long for her size. Whoever they were, he couldn't seem to remember. Surely it must've been a memory if he was dreaming of himself as a Jedi... but who were they?

As his questions were about to be answered with a shift in his point of view, Kylo suddenly woke up. Full of rage. He almost had it, almost saw the face... Yet, the moment he woke up, he thought of you. "Kriff!"

Reaching for a pillow to yell into, Kylo suddenly stilled in his spot as his eyes shot open. Sitting up enough and looking down at his thin sheets, he snarled. Why the hell did he wake up with a hard on?

Tossing his head back, he groaned as you popped right back into his thoughts. He couldn't go out this way, he knew it wouldn't go away. He's dealt with this plenty recently and he absolutely _hated_ it.

Lazily reaching into his nightstand and dropping a blob of lube on his palm, he tossed his sheets off himself with his freehand before grabbing his pillow and shoving into his face.

Panting and whining into the pillow, working his fist, Kylo whimpered as he felt his body burn up. He couldn't stop thinking about you as he touched himself, humping his own hand as his hips thrusted into the air impatiently.

You were so compelling. No matter what you did, you always had his full attention and he couldn't stand the fact that you had it so easily.

He thought about your smile. The way you spoke. How you held yourself.

And then his mind went to a darker place...

Those gowns that you wore that were so thin and almost see through. How it was obvious that you didn't wear bras with some of them. How your figure was outlined, how his mind would wander into an obscene world of its own that he couldn't help but pant whenever it came to mind.

And those breasts of yours. Those _kriffing_ breasts that he just had to see. Why was your dress off that way?! Why were your breasts out?! What in the galaxy were you trying to do?!

Pumping his fist faster, crying into his pillow as he broke out into a sweat, Kylo moaned your title into the fabric... over and over again. With his scratchy voice and his tight fist that made the nastiest of noises, Kylo hoped no one heard him. Even if his pillow was becoming useless.

Shifting uncomfortably on your bed as your breathing quickened, you woke up in a sweat, a sudden hot flash hitting you. Your body was on fire and you were unsure as to why. The second your eyes opened and you removed the sheets from you, you realized you were hot and bothered. Over what? You didn't dream of anything... indecent.

Shifting your legs and rubbing them together, you climbed out of the bed and stopped in your tracks. Your insides were twisted, almost as if your anxiety spiked for a moment. Did something happen in the middle of the night that you couldn't recall? You prayed not.

Entering the washroom, just about ready to start your routine, Kylo's eyes suddenly came to mind. Apparently, they had been lingering there for much longer than you could remember. The intensity of them, the breathtaking color, the way they looked right at you... you blushed. It almost felt  
like he was staring at you once again.

Turning on the refresher and stripping yourself from your nightgown, then your panties, your blush intensified at the sight of the giant wet spot. You couldn't believe it. How were you turned on by the Supreme Leader?!

Trying to take a calming shower, washing your face and brushing your teeth in it, you still felt... uncomfortable. Kylo eyes still there.

Pulling on a silk robe after drying up, you heard a sudden knock on your door. Your heart skipped a beat as you carefully approached it, opening it only to relax. It was _just_ Daniel.

"Is this... a bad time?" He asked, noticing you were in a robe with wet hair.

"No." You shook your head with a small smile, still thinking about Kylo and how you were _still_ turned on.

"Ah... I wanted to check in on you." Daniel said, removing his helmet and holding it underneath his arm. "Of course... it looks more like I'm checking you out, instead. My apologies."

Shaking your head, you chuckled. "It's alright, I just came out of the refresher."

"And you look that beautiful still? Amazing, you truly are a princess." Daniel grinned, showing off that bright smile of his. If you weren't so caught up on Kylo, you might've found that rather handsome. But, of course, you were so hung on the damn Supreme Leader that Daniel's flirtation went over your head.

You weren't entirely registering his words, only thinking about Kylo and the way he leaned in towards you. How he was so very close that you nearly saw each and every one of his freckles. Gorgeous beauty marks and moles. Your heart skipped a beat and you nearly reacted in a way that almost seemed as if you were reacting to Daniel, instead.

And just as you were lost in another world, the man of your not-so-innocent dreams appeared out of nowhere. Like a sudden shadow, lurking behind Daniel.

With a sudden clear of Kylo's throat, Daniel nearly jumped in his spot, pulling his helmet on, bowing towards you and nodding at Kylo before rushing off. Oh, how you wished you weren't alone with this man right now. And thank the stars that you had nothing on underneath the robe, you didn't want to ruin any of your other underwear.

Standing before you, his usually brooding stance at play, Kylo's train of thought left without him the moment he realized what you were in. A white robe that was showing just enough to drive him mad. Your skin was almost seen through the fabric, the shadow pulling out the shape of your breasts, making his heart race. And your hard nipples not making it any better for him. Stars, he wish he could touch you!

_No!_

Sucking in a sharp breath, Kylo suddenly grew angry. If he saw this, then that stormtrooper—Daniel—must've as well!

Extending his arms out and shoving you back into your room as the door shut behind him, Kylo tightened his jaw as he forced his eyes to stare elsewhere but your cleavage. "Get dressed for breakfast." He snapped as your heart raced.

Why did that sound so... pleasing? His voice was so low and deep, you could almost feel it rattle your bones. It didn't help that you still felt that stupid discomfort between your thighs... and now you had to put clothes on? You'd have to sneak away eventually, this wasn't going to go well if you stayed this way.

Turning his head and seeing the crack in your closet of where you were dressing in, Kylo was tempted to peek, only to keep himself still in his spot. He had _some_ respect for you.

Yet, he looked so awkward standing there when you emerged, dressed up and hair done well enough even if it was wet. Luckily, breakfast would be just the two of you.

And, to your amazement as he escorted you, breakfast was not in the dining hall... rather, the terrace. Underneath an awning sat a table set up for two, this time with no gap.

Pulling the chair out for you, Kylo made sure not to squeeze you this time as he pushed the chair in.

"Thank you." You smiled as he eyed you for a moment before looking away, clearing his throat.

What a strange man he was.

Sitting there in the usual silence as you ate, Kylo noticed the table was shaking... because of you. You were freezing. Your frame shivered, the cloak not enough. He wanted to ignore, but he couldn't, it was eating away at his guilty conscious.

Getting up to go on a small walk, Kylo decided to remove his cape, draping it over your shoulders as it dragged along behind you... too long for your height.

Standing frozen at his gesture as you smiled, not realizing Kylo walked on, he looked over and snapped, "Are you coming or what?"

Nodding, you quickly rushed over to his side, walking in a comfortable silence throughout the frozen garden and ponds.

"What do you enjoy about this base?" You asked, breaking the silence as you held your hands together before you, underneath your cloak and his cape.

The sound of your voice caught him off guard, almost forgetting you were even there. You were so silent, and so was he, that he didn't even hear your footsteps. When you had spoken, he contemplated whether or not to ignore you. But... of course, he couldn't seem to. You were... tempting. "I enjoy the fresh snowfall."

Hearing his flat response, you took in a small breath. He didn't bother to add anything more, just that. Fresh snowfall. But... you didn't complain. You were happy.

You were _happy_.

Because one single answer was better than nothing and you appreciated that.

The remaining of the walk was silent, Kylo's boots crunching against the snow as you quietly followed closely. Although there wasn't much to see, you still enjoyed it. It was _different_ and you liked different.

Guiding you back inside of the palace, ready to lead you back to your quarters, you suddenly spoke up as you reached beside him. "May I go back to your study?" You asked as Kylo blinked before slowly turning his head and looking down at you. "Please?"

Taking in a quiet, deep breath, Kylo looked back ahead and took a small turn down the hall as he continued to guide your path. You couldn't help but smile: he had listened to you. You remembered the hallway and the path he was taking you on. How come he didn't fight against it or ask _why_? You wouldn't find the answer; you wouldn't dare ask, anyway.

Approaching the study, Kylo came to a stop as you stood before the door. "Than—"

"I will retrieve you later."

Looking over and seeing Kylo already halfway down the hall, you couldn't help but look down and blush. The smile that grew on your lips reached your cheeks. Why was he so... awkward? Why was he so hesitant?

Coming to a realization, you snapped your head up, only to realize the Supreme Leader was no longer there. You still had his cape.

Turning a corner and aiming for his throne, Kylo felt the emptiness of something missing. Looking over his shoulder, Kylo hissed. His cape. That extra material on his back missing. Turning in his spot, as if ready to storm back, Kylo suddenly turned back in his original direction. An outside force had control over him. Instead, he went to retrieve another one.

Why? He would never tell.

Reaching over to grab the corner of the cape, you brought it to your nose and sniffed it. There was that hint of outdoors that lingered in its scent, the snow and nature... but there was something else. It was underlying. A scent that felt... comforting?

Kylo's scent.


	9. Snowfall

**A flurry** of soft gray dots filled the canvas before you as you sat before the tall glass window. There you sat, Kylo's cape still draped over your shoulders as you held a paint brush in one hand and a pallet in the other. The gentle hum of the air in the vents filled the background amongst the faint howl of the snow falling from the otherside of the window as you eyed it with ease. You didn't know what it was, but painting such a scenery felt... calming.

And, oddly,  it reminded you of Kylo. An incredible sight that held its beauty, yet, could be dangerous if you were exposed to it when it was raging on; and, when it's not? It was... gentle.

Watching as the brush stroked along the canvas, the surface picking up and absorbing the paint, you heard a gentle knock coming from the door. 

Settling the paint brush and palette down, you aimed for the door and opened it, watching the metal door slide open and present Daniel: helmet-less and smiling. "Hello, princess."

"Daniel." You bowed your head with a gentle smile. "What brings you here?"

"Thought I'd check up on you." He truthfully spoke. "Seems as if you're doing quite well... Wearing the Supreme Leader's cape." Pointing towards your shoulders, Daniel lifted his eyebrows.

Looking down at it as it engulfed you and fanned at your feet, you sucked in a small breath and held back a smile. "Yes... He forgot it." You nodded, not entirely lying as he did forget it was even on you. "So, I took it and wore it as my own. It's much too cold out and... well, it keeps me warm." You nodded as Daniel nodded back. "The Supreme Leader is actually not such a bad man when he wants to be... kind." You chuckled.

"He is a lucky man to take you to breakfast... Or, really, anywhere." Daniel grinned as you shook your head. 

"It's— It's nothing. I mean, after all, we are going to be married." You said, waving a hand dismissively. 

"My dear princess," Daniel started, reaching for your hand and pulling you over to the center seating of the study. "No man is blind enough to not see your beauty. I'm sure the Supreme Leader is finally warming up to you since you are quite the sight to see." He flirted as you blinked, eyebrows lifting. This wasn't the Daniel you first met. He was much more... confident and flirtatious. 

"Thank you, but... I like to believe he is trying to be nice." You corrected, giving him a kind smile, but he scoffed.

"Trying to be nice? The Supreme Leader is not a nice man. He's just acting that way for a reason. It's all a facade, of course!" He chuckled as your eyebrows narrowed. "But, I wouldn't say thats entirely important, seeing as this marriage is arranged... I'm sure he doesn't understand that you are something more than just a woman forced into a marriage for him to get heirs out of." 

"That's... That's not true." You forced a chuckle, shaking your head. A part of you wanted to believe it was a lie... but a bigger part of you believed it to be true. 

Reaching to grab your hand in his glove-covered own, Daniel moved slightly closer as you gulped, looking him in those bright blue eyes of his. "Princess, I would never lie to you." 

Stomping through the halls of the palace, taking the route he knew like the back of his hand that lead him to his study, Kylo felt his heart racing. It had been a few hours since he had last seen you, and for some deranged reason, deep down inside of him... he missed you. A piece of him craved you, desired to settle his eyes on that pretty pair of yours. And, sadly, he couldn't even tell which exact pair his brain was lusting over.

Huffing, Kylo clenched his jaw, trying to avert those thoughts and focus on what was truly important.

Key word: trying. It seemed impossible when you constantly sat on the back of his mind, no matter what.

And, no matter what, it was never because he was mad at you. It was because he was infatuated by you and he couldn't stand the thought—nor did a piece of him want to stop it. He almost felt as if... he needed this.

How foolish of you, Ren.

Approaching the study's door, he waved a hand for it to open, not slowing his pace until his dark eyes landed on a pair of figures much too close to one another.

Feeling the heat rise to his face as his fury and rage boiled his blood, Kylo snarled as he outstretched his hand, watching Daniel fly back and slam against a wall before he could dare kiss you.

Jumping up from your seat with a gasp, seeing Daniel crash into the wall ahead of you, your heart skipped a beat as your eyes widened. Hearing a low growl come from the left of you, your head snapped over as Kylo stood there with clenched fists, glaring at a disgruntled Daniel. "Leave before I decide to rip your head off with my bare hands!" Kylo snarled through tight teeth, watching Daniel scramble to his feet, reaching for his helmet and rushing right out of the room without a word or a single look at you.

Feeling your heart race within your chest as you took in deep breaths, slowly turning your head back ahead to see a small indent in the wall, you gulped at the thought of Kylo's strength. At how powerful he must've been... if that was even the least bit of his strength. 

Trying to calm your breathing, your view was suddenly blocked by Kylo's towering figure, staring down at you with narrowed eyebrows. He eyed you, studied at your face, almost as if inspecting every inch of it without touching you. "Are you okay?" He asked, but it came out more of a demand with his tone of voice. 

Slowly nodding your head, looking up at him as his eyes shifted to meet your own, you sucked in a small breath. "It was nothing." 

Biting down, knowing very well it wasn't nothing, Kylo tightened his fists, wishing Daniel was still there so he could rid him of his existence. No one was allowed to kiss you, to touch you, to cross those boundaries. No one. But, before he could feel himself explode on why you shouldn't have allowed some stormtrooper in, his focus landed on the painting diagonal to you. The snow painting. 

Suddenly swallowing, feeling his shoulders drop, he inhaled through his nose as his eyebrows softened—something you easily noticed.

Following the direction he was looking in, your heart fell to the pit of your stomach. Your painting wasn't even finished and you knew he must've found it horrendous. You, wasting his supplies, painting something you didn't normally see back on Calidum... "I'm— I'm sorry, I couldn't help but paint..."

Turning from you and slowly approaching it, Kylo eyed the unfinished piece, eyes scanning it almost as if it was some sort of text he couldn't quite read but was intrigued by. "It is an... okay piece."

Smiling, not caring that it was okay—especially when it was undone and your first time painting the snow—you nodded. That was enough coming out of him, you knew that. It was something and it was better than nothing. "Thank you." You softly responded as Kylo bit his tongue, shutting his eyes for a moment before reopening them and stealing up once again.

"I am going on a mission to Eadu, you are going with me. No questions asked. No declining." He stated as your eyes grew in size. The Supreme Leader was taking you on a mission? Rather than leaving you behind? You couldn't help but want to jump out of your skin in excitement. Kylo Ren was thinking more and more about you... he must've been.  "We will be departing in the morning and I need you to gather whatever you need for a three day trip."

Nodding your head, you blinked and smiled in excitement, trying to compose yourself. "Thank you—“

"Dinner will be served to you, would you like it brought to your room?" He asked with the most flat expression as you sucked in a breath.

"May we share—“

"They will deliver it here." At that, Kylo turned and exited the room, leaving you with a tilt in your head. Why did he bother asking, then?  Either way, you were glad he wasn't as aggressive and dismissive of you anymore, rather... tolerating you.

Realizing you had some time left before dinner would be served, you decided to return back to your painting to finish it up. It didn't take quite that long to do so, seeing as it was a simple scenery, so the second you had finished it, you placed it to a side to dry before cleaning your small mess.

Hearing the door open as a droid rolled in, amazed that it wasn't Low, you watched as it settled your tray to a side before scurrying off. Almost as if it had plenty of other meals to deliver. 

Deciding to walk around the study as you ate, holding one of the plates in your hand, you eyed the numerous spines of the books along the shelves only to stop at one. 

Finishing up the plate and settling it down, you reached for the book and pulled it out, eyeing its leather covering and realizing it was quite old. 

A book about calligraphy.

Bringing it with you to the desk near the easel, you skimmed through the book, reading key points before pulling out a scroll you found rolled underneath the table. There had been a few shoved together and you were sure taking and using one wouldn't harm anyone.

The moment the inked pen hit the scroll, all sense of time went out the window. You were so focused—like the last time—that you hadn't realized how long you had been there. You were heavily invested in practicing and improving that you had fallen asleep on top of the drying scroll.

 

 

 

 

 **Kylo** couldn't remember the last time he had true time to himself. Ever since he had become Supreme Leader, he hardly had time for much. But, today... today he needed to express himself in some way that wasn't killing, yelling, or throwing a hissy fit. Instead, he aimed for his study.

It was late in the evening, Kylo was positive the knights—or even yourself—took you back to your quarters after dinner.

Dinner... 

The fact that you were implying to have dinner with him scared him too much.

But, when he waved a hand and entered the moment the door opened, Kylo's heart sank as he saw you in the distance... fast asleep against the table.

Quietly walking over and realizing you had read the beginners book of calligraphy, Kylo looked down at you and could hardly eye the text beneath your cheek. What had you written that kept you in the study for so long? 

Carefully picking your head up enough to show the writing as he shifted you a bit away, he eyed the scroll, reading along the lines as his eyebrows narrowed with every word read 

Every word about him. 

Him. Kylo Ren. The Supreme Leader of the First Order. Masters of the Knights of Ren.

Comparing him to snow. And he couldn't seem to understand why. Why was he your muse? Why were you writing about him when he had shown the least bit of interest in you?

Sucking in a breath, looking over at you as you rested, Kylo bit his inner lip. The way your eyelashes curled, how your lips pursed in your sleep, the gentle rise and fall of a strand of your hair that sat along the tip of your nose... Your skin looked so soft. You looked so soft, and the more he stared at you, the more his heart raced.

Leaning in rather slowly, lips hovering over your cheek enough to almost feel the skin, Kylo quickly stood up and bit his fist. What the hell was he trying to do?!

Growling and clenching his fists, Kylo haphazardly lifted you in his arms and left the study. He couldn't understand his own motives towards you anymore, they all blurred together and it felt as if he had no control when it came to you. When he wanted to yell at you, he only bit back. When he wanted to ignore you, he only tended to you. What was he becoming?

Waving his hand as the door to your chambers opened, Kylo aimed for your bed and settled you on it, above your sheets. Just about to walk away, he only stayed at your bed side, towering figure staring down at you as he watched your chest rise and fall with every breath you took.

Then, he thought about it. What you had written. Out of all things you could've written about, you wrote about him. The man that neglected your existence, the man that had locked you away out of jealousy, the man that... didn't understand what it was to feel things that weren't just rage and pain... 

Sucking in a deep breath, looking away and realizing you hadn't packed a thing, considering requesting your droid, Kylo turned away and aimed for your closet, grabbing a suitcase. Settling it on the coffee table before your sofa, Kylo filled it up with different sorts of gowns and coats, picking those he found to be prettiest.

Then, it came to your undergarments. A small whine left his lips as he opened the drawer that was filled with all sorts of panties and he didn't know what to pick or where to even start. All he wanted to do was just shove his face into the drawer. He snapped out of his thoughts and grabbed two fistfuls worth and shoved them with the rest of your clothing... even if it was just a three day trip. He didn't bother giving you any bras. Wasn't like you wore them anyway.

Zipping up your luggage and placing it near the door, Kylo eyed you one more time, only to move back to your side, removing your shoes and placing you underneath your sheets before taking a step back. The urge to kiss you goodnight creeped on him, but he knew better.

After all, he felt nothing for you... right?


	10. Contact

**The brushstrokes** that were left behind with the calculated movements of the Supreme Leader's wrists left behind its print on the large canvas that sat before Kylo. It was much bigger than what he was used to, easily twice his width rather than being half his size. But, for some reason, Kylo was feeling far too much to have a small canvas capture it.

Not realizing what entirely he was painting, seeing as he had set everything up so swiftly and got to work so suddenly, he took a step back and felt his chest tighten. It was you, you standing before a balcony to the view of a vast ocean... and he wasn't entirely sure how he got _there_. He wasn't even sure as to how he was able to draw it out when you weren't even there to be his muse...

Tightening his ungloved hand around the paint brush, Kylo looked away from the canvas and found his focus on the parchment paper you had written on. His heart ached within his chest as his eyes lingered on it from afar, nearly reciting key lines that lingered within his thoughts. Why were you so... kind? Why did you bother with him, anyway? It wasn't like you loved him, but you gave him _attention_. Something he only got when he was on a rampage... not when he was simply _existing_. You must've been acting such way since you knew you were stuck with him. Forced to marry him and spend the rest of your lives together.

That was it. That must've been it. You would never love him.

And he wasn't sure why the thought left him so bothered.  
  
  
  


**Feeling** the bright lights seep through your eyelids as you stirred, your senses suddenly kicked in as you realized you were not where you were when you had fallen asleep. Or, at least, not where you last remember being. Forcing your eyes open and recognizing your room, you sat up on your elbows and eyed your surroundings. How did you get there? Did you sleep walk?

Sitting up from your bed and rubbing your eyes, you cracked your neck from how stiff it felt before standing up, and aiming for the washroom. You didn't ponder too long on how you got back to your room, assuming you were far too exhausted to even remember... You just hoped your painting and calligraphy were fine.

Looking in the mirror and growing wide eyed, you blushed at the sight of your cheek being smudged in the ink you used to write with, instantly washing your face and brushing your teeth to freshen up before peeling your clothes off to enter the refresher. You had taken much longer than usual, feeling sluggish as you washed up. The moment you stepped out to dry yourself, walking out of the washroom to grab your outfit for the day, you stopped in your tracks.

Seeing the luggage on your dining table, you couldn't quite recall ever setting up your bag for the mission you'd soon embark on...

Furrowing your eyebrows and walking over, undoing the latch and popping it open, your eyes widened at the sight of the numerous amounts of underwear shoved into the compartment. "What in the galaxy..." You breathed. Maybe Low had come in as you slept to help you pack? Whatever or whoever it was, you closed the suitcase and continued on getting ready.

Pulling on a matching, two piece outfit, you pulled back a portion of your hair into a small knot before slipping your feet into a pair of shoes. Reaching for a cloak and tugging it on, you heard a knock on your door.

"Princess." A knight spoke as they stood at your door, you looking over and nodding, knowing very well they were there to retrieve you.

Watching the other knight grab your bag, you followed the two out, over to the hangar. You wondered if the knights would be joining you and Kylo or if it was just the two of you... A part of you hoped for the latter, seeing as Kylo was slowly improving himself the more time he spent around you.

Leading you towards Kylo's shuttle and up the ramp, your eyes landed on the Supreme Leader as he was already on board. Kylo had been in the midsts of preparing the shuttle for departure when you had appeared, catching his eyes as he stared at you with such intensity in them. He couldn't forget the night before... carrying you to your room, packing your bag... painting you. And, with that small smile you had on your lips that greeted him, Kylo had to look away before he felt his black heart melt into his stomach. There was no time for weaknesses.

Watching him dismiss you after eyeing you for a solid minute, you saw as Kylo disappeared to where the pilots were, leaving you with the knights. "If I may ask... who is to attend this mission aside from Kylo and I?"

Turning their focus towards you, one of the knights spoke up. "Us, as well. Kylo needs the extra pair of eyes. Especially to watch over you."

Lifting your eyebrows, you turned your head towards the direction Kylo had gone in, then deciding to take a seat. You knew this would be quite the long trip... The knights weren't much conversation starters, anyway.  
  
  
  
  


**The sound** of thunder snapped you out of your empty thoughts. You did your best to keep Kylo out of them, not wishing to even give him any sort of attention... even in your mind. You tried your best to be nice, and you knew—you could tell—he was trying with you, but it always failed him. He always put his anger and title before himself. Deciding to be stoic, to be lifeless, to have _one_ emotion.

You just wanted to get through to him, to get something out of him, to make a friend. Was that so hard to ask? Apparently so.

Feeling the ship tremble before it landed, you stood up the second you saw Kylo emerge, ignoring you as he trudged off, leaving you with the knights. Again.

"Let's go." One of the knights spoke, nudging their head and instantly walking on as you then followed.

The sound of the rain grew louder and louder as you approached the ramp. Pulling the hood of your cloak on, you joined the small group out, towards the structure you assumed was where you'd be spending the next three days in.

You could hardly paint it out, the amount of rain and darkness that surrounded you restricted your vision. You were sure the planet was one giant storm cloud seeing as there wasn't a single sign of the storm coming to an end, and... you didn't mind. It reminded you of home when those occasional storm clouds appeared and rained for a whole week.

Snapping out of your thoughts as you realized the small group was far ahead, you quickly joined them as they entered the structure built within a mountains cave. The only signs that something was there were the bright lights that lead the pathway and surrounded the main entrance.

Moving behind Kylo as the Knights stood behind you, you watched as the large, metal door slid open to allow the four of you in. Turning your focus away from the rain and towards the entrance, you entered and eyed the long, dark hallway that was poorly lit from the distant lights. You were starting to believe it was one of the First Order's off-site facilities with how hidden and... gloomy it was.

"You two will stay behind and watch over her." Kylo ordered as the knights nodded without question. Turning his eyes from his men, over to you, Kylo tightened his jaw before turning on his heel and walked right off without a word. Once again... leaving you in the dust.

Frowning, you stood amongst the knights, unsure of what to do as they stood there like statues, unwilling to leave. How long was this going to last? You decided to stand by one of the windows that presented the storm, watching it rain down as the occasional lightning struck. Although dangerous, it seemed far more beautiful than being indoors... bored out of your mind for hours.

Turning your head to see the knights with their backs facing you, you bit your bottom lip as you looked back out of the window. You needed to do something. You couldn't just sit there all day and wait for Kylo, right? Sucking in a breath, you looked at the knights once more before removing your shoes and settling them to a side.

Quietly, placing your hood back on, you crept away and rushed towards a side door, slipping through and instantly being greeted by the heavy rainfall. You just wanted to do something. To be away from the constant eyes and be free for _once_. Just this once.

Standing underneath some coverage, you removed your hood, shrugged off the attached coat, allowing it to fall onto the ground before rushing right into the rain—something you did plenty back home. There was something about nature, about the beauty of rainfall, even if it seemed like such sad weather. But, to you, you found it breath taking.

Looking up at the dark skies, thinking about yourself as a child and how your parents would scold you each and every time you came back soaked or were found out in the rain, you smiled to yourself. You still did it anyway. Back then and even now. You never really liked being tied down by rules.

Returning to where he had left the knights, Kylo's pace quickened as he eyed the two, realizing the third party was no longer in sight. And it seemed as if the knights were just as frantic as they quickly eyed their surroundings.

" _Where_ is she?!" He snapped, heart racing as he tried searching through the Force.

"We lost sight of her, she was just right there!" A knight pointed towards the window.

"How can you lose sight of her?! It's only the three of you! _Three!_ You can't possibly lose a woman!" He spat. "Where is the Princess?!"

"Sir, we could—"

"I do _not_ want to hear it! You had one simple task!" Kylo yelled, gritting his teeth and storming off to search for you. His panic and anger were not a good mixture for him at the moment. Or, really... _ever_.

Furiously searching the grounds, eyeing different hallways and doorways, Kylo took a sudden double take as he passed an opening; a door slightly ajar. Stomping over and shoving it open, Kylo nearly yelled out for you, only to freeze in his tracks at the sight of you... spinning in your spot with arms wide opens, welcoming the rain all over you. As if you were a _child_.

Just about to storm up to you, Kylo watched as you happily twirled around, smiling and sighing in content. A part of him wanted to stare, to be caught in the alluring trance. You were a space angel and he hated how easily you encased him, like a Jawa to salvaged goods.

Slowing your spins as your arms fell to your sides, you huffed and gazed up at the sky, feeling as if you were home once again. That is, of course, until you turned and saw a furious Supreme Leader stand there before you, drenched head to toe from the rain water, glaring right through your soul.

Gulping, your heart skipped a beat as your eyes widened, fearing Kylo would do something as a punishment for you running off without permission. The way he looked you in the eyes had your heart racing, the way his hand lifted... you readied yourself for _something_.

Something intense and frightening, making you flinch in your spot.

Yet, you felt a pair of warm lips against your own. _His_ own.

Feeling a gasp get caught in your throat as your wide eyes stared at him, paralyzed in your spot, Kylo instantly stood up straight and eyed you with narrowed eyebrows before turning and rushing back inside, leaving you in the rain.

Blinking a few times, you took in heavy breaths before touching your lips that tingled. His lips— _Kylo Ren's_ lips—leaving an imprint as you wavered in the rain, staring in the direction he practically ran in.

Feeling the heat move up to your face, your heart fluttered. Had that truly happened? It must've, the rain was too cold to let your mind wander... And it wasn't like you'd ever imagine yourself kissing the Supreme Leader... Would you?

For those next three days, you hadn't seen a single sign of Kylo Ren.

 


	11. Runaway

**A pair** of silhouettes stood underneath the bright moonlight. Soft murmurs echoed into the night sky as gentle touches and caresses were formed from the figures outlines.

" _You're so beautiful under the moonlight_... _All the stars in the night sky can't possibly compare to those that coat your face_." The angelic voice spoke. " _My moondust_."

" _Moondust?_ " The deeper voice sniggered. " _If I am your moondust then you must be my starlight._ "

" _Do I bring out the light from within you?_ "

" _You bring out all that is good, hidden within me, my dear starlight._ "

Watching the two figures lean into one another, the imagery faded into that of another one. Of you.

It played out before him, the moment he reached out and held the back of your head, pulling you to him as lips connected with your own. The softness of them, how they felt perfect against his. How his heart raced, how his face burned... how his chest ached. How something within him he had never felt before, or never knew he had, had awoken.

Forcing himself awake, Kylo lied there and stared at the ceiling before him, chest heaving as he thought about you. Your lips and eyes, your soft complexity and beauty. His heart ached at the fantasy of you, standing before him.

"Kriff!" Rubbing his face as he yelled into his palms, Kylo's breathing quickened at the thought of his movements. Of his _mistake_.

He shouldn't have kissed you, he should've done what he was meant to do. To reprimand you, to yell in your face for being so disobedient and childish.

Yet, the Supreme Leader of the First Order saw you—the Princess—swirl around amongst the rainfall like an angel. And he was livid by the matter, by the thought that his first action was to _kiss_ you.

And now, all he wanted was to kiss you more.   
  
  
  
  
  


**It** had been a few days since you, the knights, and Kylo Ren has returned from Eadu. Since then, you had hardly seen Kylo; even in the shuttle he made it his goal to avoid you in every since of the word. Not even eye contact. And as the days passed, the harder it seemed to get for you.

Things were going so well, it felt like it. As if he was _trying_ his best to be nice to you. Yet, there you sat, alone in the dining hall with no one but the company of the occasional droid to serve you.

The days went on like this. Lonesome breakfasts and dinners, sitting at the head of the table with no one else to fill the empty spots. Your chewing being faint as the sounds of the utensils hitting the dishes echoed against the tall walls. There were even moments that you sipped at your wine or water and felt insanely bored that you studied the glass that held the liquid. Once you finished your meals, you always found yourself back in the study; reading, writing, or painting something now.

Before you knew it, two weeks had passed you by. Two very long weeks that made it seem as if you lived alone with nothing but droids. You had hardly even seen the knights, they were non existent to you like their master was. And so were the rest of the First Order officers and stormtroopers _including_ Daniel. Maybe Kylo had rid him for good... Maybe Daniel no longer was on Starkiller II.

Disappointment struck you harshly on the fourteenth day as you leaned into a window, watching the snow fall from above. A frown took on your lips as you held your cloak together. You had wandered around the palace and couldn't seem to do anything but sulk. You thought Kylo had changed the least bit for you—in the sense that he'd try to be friendlier. Yet, he was nowhere to be found.

Did he not like kissing you? Was it bad? You didn't kiss back... but maybe he didn't like the feeling of your lips against his own...

A part of your felt bothered by the thought. Your heart sank as your shoulders slumped. Would you have kissed him back? Your heart raced at the thought.

"I don't believe we have met." Hearing a muffled female voice speak up from behind, you turned in your spot, eyeing the chrome armor. "Captain Phasma."

Standing up straight, you bowed your head, extending your arm. "Captain Phasma... I am—"

"The Princess. Y/N. I am well aware." She nodded once, taking your hand in hers as she shook it. "I don't have the... blessing of being within the palace as often, I am busy tending to the stormtroopers on the main base."

"Oh..." you nodded. "It's lovely to meet you." You softly smiled, pulling your hand back and bringing it over your other before you.

"Does a princess normally sulk around and stare out windows as if waiting for her husband to return from war?" Phasma asked as you looked down for a moment, only to stifle a laugh at her faint humor.

"Not really, no." You shook your head. "It must be that obvious, hmm..."

"It is quite the rare occurrence to even find someone as... bright as you in a place like this." She said, catching your attention as you looked up at her. "What is it that Ren has done wrong?"

Blinking, you shook your head, completely caught off guard. "Huh?"

"I am no fool, Y/N." She spoke, causing your eyebrows to lift. You couldn't recall the last time someone referred to you by your name rather than title. "Ren is a hard man to read and understand. He is a hard man in general. He is the way that he is for certain reasons, plenty that I rather he disclose with you when the time comes—which, I know it will."

"I— Nothing... He did—"

"He's hiding from you." Phasma so calmly stated as you frowned. "Ah, I am right."

"I— I don't know what I did wrong... I thought I was getting something nice out of him... A friend of some sort, but it now seems impossible..." You breathed, looking back down. 

"It isn't impossible." Phasma said as you looked back up. "I never expected a man like Kylo Ren to have the slightest bit of a heart. Yet, he was the one who helped make sure I was alive once the Supremacy had fallen. He is the reason why I am here today and why I have trust in him." She confessed. "There is something within him that is holding him back from showing you that side. Whether it be his fear or ego, there is a way through him. And I'm sure you've already left your mark on him. After all, you will soon be his wife."

Looking up at her as you gulped, you slowly nodded.

"This is all very new to him as it is to you. I'm sure he's hiding because he's afraid that if he does become closer to you, he'd push you away. Ren has already made foolish decisions surrounding you, and after bringing you on a mission? I'm more than positive that the Supreme Leader is _trying_."

"Thank you, Phasma." You softly smiled, sucking in a breath. "Maybe you're right..."

"I am not here to be the middle man or a counselor, but I want what's best for him... And that involves what's best for _you_." At that, Phasma bowed her head before walking off.

Standing there with a sliver of hope and a gentle grin on your lips, you heard footsteps approaching you. "Princess?" Turning your head and seeing a stormtrooper approach you, you sucked in a breath as you automatically knew who it was as they took off their helmet.

"Daniel..." You spoke, playing with one of the many rings on your fingers.

"Forgive me for what happened all those weeks ago. I never intended to cross any boundaries or to make you feel uncomfortable." He apologized, holding a hand to his chest. "I just wish to fix things between us if you allow me to."

Eyeing him for a moment, sucking in a breath, you slowly nodded. After all, Daniel was the only company you truly had.

"I promise you, I will make my free time worth while with you so you never feel alone." He bowed his head. "Let me make up for the time loss."

And so he did. A few more days had passed you by and you felt less lonely. Breakfast and dinner were still only just you, but at least you had your daily meet ups with Daniel whenever he was off duty or on break. You were even amazed that he was still positioned on the palace... Maybe Kylo had forgotten.

"There was a rogue trooper in the FN corps. FN-2187." Daniel began as you stood before him, just on the terrace as you eyed the fresh snow. "He helped a prisoner escape on the Finalizer. Ran away and joined the Resistance. It has been said that he fought the Supreme Leader... failed, of course... but, he's still alive."

"Really?" You nearly whispered as you now eyed Daniel.

"Yes. He and the Scavenger. Of course, the Scavenger won that and left the Supreme Leader with that gruesome scar on his."

Growing wide eyed as your lips fell into that of an 'o' shape, you blinked. "Oh..."

Taking in a deep breath, Daniel eyed you. "Princess... may I be honest with you?"

Lifting your eyebrows, you nodded. "Yes, of course..."

"I want to leave."

"Leave? Leave... your position?" You questioned, but Daniel shook his head.

"Leave the First Order. Start a life away from the war... or maybe do what's truly right." He nodded with a glimmer in his eyes as your eyebrows now narrowed. "Get away from it. From here. From the cold and the cruel people. From the Supreme Leader."

Gasping and taking a small step back, you shook your head. "Excuse me?"

Taking a step forward, Daniel reached for your hands as he smiled. "Princess, you deserve so much better than this! Away from here! You deserve happiness and freedom, a life without war! A husband who would truly love you for you than for an arranged marriage!"

Shaking your head and snatching your hands away, you scrunched up your nose in disgust. "These are our people! These are the people we fight with and for! We are in the right, not them!" You exclaimed. "It is my duty to serve for those who are on our side and I am to be married to Kylo Ren!"

"You had no say in any of this! You are forced into this, princess! Please understand I want what's best for you—"

"Is that to run away with you? Is that what's best for me?" You pointed at yourself. "To leave it all behind! To abandon our people! To bring disgrace to my family name?! No, Daniel, that is the easy way out! I am not weak!" You spat.

"It is not a weakness when you put yourself first, my dear princess." He calmly spoke. "You always come first before them."

Standing in silence as you closed your mouth, Daniel pulled his helmet back on as you watched.

"I will give you a few days to decide if you'd like join me. If you chose to, know that there is a better future for you out there." At that, Daniel walked back into the palace.

That night you hardly slept, waking up from the same nightmare that never ceases to make you wake up in frightful tears. You couldn't seem to understand as to what it was, or how it broke you so easily, but the sight of seeing two figures being forcefully separated had you weeping.

Tossing and turning in bed, whimpering and feeling the tears spill, you forced your eyes to open, only to gasp. Kylo stood there, and you instinctively reached for him... only to realize he wasn't truly there. A figment of your imagination.

Your heart shattered at that as you felt more tears emerge. You felt empty and lonely all over again. No one there to comfort you, to hold you and tell you it was okay. It was you and only you... and that piece of you that imagined Kylo being there yearned for him.

Standing up from your bed and knowing you wouldn't be able to fall back asleep, you slipped your feet into slippers, reached for your cloak to then stop. Kylo's cape. Seeing it on your couch, you pulled it on and breathed in, his scent filling your nose.

Shaking your head, you walked right out of your quarters and into the halls. It had been a number of days since you had last been inside the study and you were starting to miss it's homey feel. Something you hadn't realized it had until that very moment.

Entering the room and finding it barren, you eyed its surroundings, seeing your creations still in their same spot amongst the books you read. Just as you were about to walk towards your paintings, something caught your eye. Something hidden behind the bookshelves.

Walking over and reaching for what seemed like a canvas, you pulled it out, only for multiple to fall out with it.

Moving to your knees and eyeing the pieces, your heart raced. They all were you. Or, at least looked very much like you. They were moments as if taken from a memory you never had and put on to a canvas.

Just about to put them back, one caught your attention—you on your home planet. Or so it seemed.

Placing the rest back and keeping the large canvas in your hold, eyeing it, you couldn't help but take it with you. Something about it felt so comforting, like a gentle reminder of why you were there.

But, as you were about to return to your personal chambers, you stopped in your tracks as the man you hadn't seen in what felt like centuries stood before you. A thick silence weaved between the two of you as you stared at one another. Your chest began to feel heavy as your heart began to thud within it.

Gulping, you watched as Kylo's eyes trailed down your figure, to your hand—the canvas. "What are you doing with _that_?" He snapped as you blinked.

"I— I found it to be lovely and wanted it for my chambers—"

"You don't take what isn't yours!" His voice began to raise as his jaw clenched.

"I'm... I'm sorry, I— I didn't know it—"

"You have no right to even touch that! They're hidden for a reason!" Kylo shouted as your stomach turned. "No one! Not even you! Are allowed to see that!"

Feeling your chest heave as your body trembled, you reached your shaky arms out. "I'm— I'm so sorry, I didn't... I never meant to take your art— I just... It looked awfully like me and I assumed it was meant—"

"You _assumed_?!" He seethed. "Nothing! Nothing here is yours! You own nothing! You _are_ nothing!"

Gasping, your heart snapped as your eyes filled with tears.

"You are a nuisance! I don't want you here, I never did! And I never wanted to marry a childish princess like you!" Snatching the painting from your hold, Kylo pulled out his lightsaber and slashed it across the painting as you choked out a cry, watching in horror as he destroyed the painting right before you.

Covering your mouth as you felt your tears slip, you turned and rushed right off, running as fast and as far away as you could before colliding right into someone. "Princess?"

Looking up through a blurred vision, you lowered your hand. "D— Daniel?"

"Is... Is everything alright?" He asked as you shook your head.

"No... No, you were right." You trembled, looking at him with sad eyes as he held your arms.

"Will you leave with me?" He asked.

Standing before him, thinking about what Kylo had done... nearly hearing his insults once again as they floated around in your head, you nodded. "Y—Yes."


	12. Coruscant

**Heavy**  breathing filled the palace air as the Supreme Leader stood there with a hunch in his back, one hand tightly gripped around the hilt of his saber as the other held the remnants of the now shredded painting. He couldn't hear his own thoughts, the sound of racing heart filling the void as his breathing was caught in the mix. Snapping his head up again, Kylo's breath suddenly got caught in his throat.

You were gone.

Harshly biting down, Kylo tossed the destroyed painting against the wall before storming into the study, using the Force to bring his hidden collection to the surface, he stopped with a heaving chest.

To the left of him sat a small pile of paintings, and the first one had been one he had recognized.

Turning on his heel as his own collection collided with the ground, he aimed for the stack, using the Force to lift them, one by one, as they hovered before him. The first being the snow painting. The rest... were all him.

Standing there frozen, feeling his body tremble as his extended hand began to vibrate, Kylo's lightsaber slipped from his grip and deactivated the moment it hit the ground. Eyeing them, one by one, Kylo felt his eyes burn as the more tears collected. Something within himself ached, something shattered. A piece of him felt loss—the piece he had discovered the moment he had kissed you.

Falling to his knees as all your paintings surrounded him the moment they dropped, he let out an ear piercing yell as his fists clenched—books flying off of the shelves, paintbrushes and unused easels crashing onto the ground as the lights flickered.

Feeling his body slump forward as his hands caught him, Kylo took in deep breaths, heart echoing within his ears. Seeing the corner of a painting, his blurred vision lifted with his head as he eyed it. A new painting. Pulling it closer to him, he hadn't realized that at the bottom stood two figures: you and Kylo.

Picking it up as he slowly stood, breathing heavily, he turned and looked towards the door. He had to find you.   
  
  
  
  
  


" **We**  will get you as far away from here as possibly." Daniel spoke as he held your hand, rushing alongside one another as he brought you to a lonesome ship that sit amongst the snow. You didn't seem to question how it was there or how he had access to it, your mind too hazy with that of your panic. You wanted nothing more than to get away from Kylo Ren.  _Far_  away.

Helping you inside and taking the pilot's seat, you sat in silence, staring at your lap as fresh tears continued to stream down your face. Deep down, you knew you weren't thinking straight. Yet, your fearful mind took control and worked on impulses. All you could think about, all you could  _see_  was Kylo destroying the painting as you watched in horror. You knew what he was capable of, knew of his anger, but you never expected to see it first hand over a  _painting_.

Not realizing Daniel had left the "planet's" atmosphere, you lifted your focus at the sound of his voice, only to see open space. "Now that we are far from the base, I need you to know the truth."

Sniffling, you turned your head to look at him, eyebrows furrowed. "Yes?"

"I am with the Resistance." He admitted as you blinked. "I was sent to spy on the Supreme Leader and share information with those of the rebellion."

Taking in a deep breath, you eyed him. "Was I a part of this?"

"No." He shook his head. "But... Seeing you, living a life you did not deserve... I couldn't let you suffer."

Sucking in a deep breath, you slowly nodded. "But you failed your mission... You left with nothing..."

"I left with you." He softly spoke. "I am giving you a better life than one you'd ever have with Kylo Ren."

Gulping and looking away from his bright blue eyes, you stared off into the stars, mind blank as you couldn't seem to focus on anything.

That is until Phasma's words echoed within your head:

" _This is all very new to him as it is to you. I'm sure he's hiding because he's afraid that if he does become closer to you, he'd push you away. Ren has already made foolish decisions surrounding you, and after bringing you_ _on_ _a mission? I'm more than positive that the Supreme Leader is trying_."

"... _if he does become closer to you, he'd push you away_."

"... ** _push you away_**."

Feeling your bottom lip tremble, your eyes filled up with tears, your mind finding excuses to defend Kylo. But you wouldn't allow yourself. You  _couldn't_.

Yet, the feeling lingered.  
  
  
  
  
  


 **Frantically**  searching your quarters, Kylo began to panic. You were nowhere to be found. Not in the washroom, not in your bed (or underneath it), not even on the window sill. Kylo found himself separating your gowns haphazardly, assuming you had to be hidden within them... but, you weren't. Taking in deep breaths, feeling his chest heave as he clenched and unclenched his fists, Kylo stood amongst your dresses, a flowery scent filling the room as he breathed it in. Feeling his heart skip a beat, Kylo stormed right out, only to stop in his tracks.

Eyeing your room for his cape, his eyes widened, remembering how you had been wearing it the moment he ran into you.

Rushing out of your quarters and searching the halls, rooms, and closets that you could've been hidden in, Kylo's luck was wearing thin. He knew he needed help, but he didn't dare ask for it. He couldn't. This was his fault, anyway... And Hux would put the blame on him. He didn't need the general chewing his ear out for losing the Princess who was soon to be the Supreme Leader's  _wife_.

"Kriff." He hissed, storming along the corridors, only to see Phasma speak to a pair of her stormtroopers.

"Are you  _positive_?"  Phasma snarled, leaning in to the two.

"Yes, captain. It seemed as if he was... escorting her." The trooper on the left spoke.

"By the  _hand_?" She questioned as the two nodded. "In which direction?"

"Out into the forest, captain." The trooper on the right nodded.

Watching the interaction, Kylo narrowed his eyes as he listened in.

"And why did you not follow them out?" Phasma seethed.

"We did! We followed but it was too late, they had an marked vehicle fly off!" The same stormtrooper answered. "It seems as if—"

"Where is the princess?!" Kylo snapped, popping out of nowhere and frightening the two stromtroopers. "You saw her! Where is she?!"

Watching the veins pop out of Kylo's neck, Phasma took in a deep breath. "My two men claimed to have seen her being taken by another stormtrooper."

"Where?" Kylo spoke through tight teeth. " _Where_  did  _he_  take  _her_?"

Turning her head back to the two, Phasma nodded. "Out— Out into the forest, Supreme Leader! Into a shuttle and they—" Suddenly choking on their words, Kylo lifted his hand as he leaned in.

"And you did not stop them?" He hissed as the stormtrooper choked out.

"We— We couldn't! It— it was too late!"

Yanking his hand back, Kylo turned away and trudged off as the trooper fell onto the floor. He knew who it was, he knew who had taken you.  _Daniel_.  
  
  
  


 **Feeling**  the ship rock, your eyes fluttered open. You couldn't recall falling asleep, losing all sense of time, only to jump in your seat at the sight of a city scape before you. In the distance, from behind, you heard a voice. Then, it all began to make sense. It was Daniel... you ran away with him. Blinking, then rubbing your eyes, you stood up and tugged your cloak. "Ugh..." Realizing it was Kylo's cape, you frowned, looking back out the canopy's window, only to turn. You followed where the voice was coming from.

"We have landed on Coruscant."

"Yes... Yes, we will abandon the ship here."

"The princess is asleep, I will tell her we are meeting with the Resistance. She believed every word I said." Hearing Daniel's wicked snicker, your heart sank. "She will not know the truth, she will think that the Resistance has its own base on Kamino."

"Yes, I know. We will be there promptly. I need to find another spacecraft."

"Of course. The Supreme Leader will be outraged. The plan is going accordingly."

Feeling your bottom lip tremble as your heart began to race, you slowly backed up, only to turn around and frantically search for a way out.

How could you have been so foolish?! To believe a stormtrooper you hardly knew! To let him persuade you, to run away with him, not thinking what the consequences were!

You wanted to puke, your stomach turning in ways it shouldn't have as your heart lodged up your throat. You couldn't panic, you had to think straight, to find a way far from Daniel.

"She will never return to that useless fiend."

Hearing Daniel's voice continue on, you rushed yourself, knowing you only had a short period of time before he'd find you. You searched anxiously, anywhere and everywhere, until you found a latch. Opening it up and seeing the bottom of the landing platform, you held tightly onto the cape and didn't think twice about jumping right out, biting your tongue as you landed wrong.

Huffing, you stood up and winced in pain, your ankle aching. Trying to rush off, far from the vessel, you looked around for any sort of exit. You knew you were limited on time, knew very well you were completely alone on this, but you'd rather be lost than held prisoner by some man who claimed a false identity.

Carefully sliding along the walls, within the shadows, you tried steadying your breathing as you blinked away newfound tears.  _No time to panic, I can't panic now, I need a way out_. You thought to yourself, spotting an exit and more than ready to run across. But, as you lifted one foot to rush off, you felt a pain in your neck as your body began to move slowly. Your being becoming heavy. Too heavy for you to even move... And when you tried focusing on your destination, it all blurred. The last thing you saw was the pavement beneath you.  
  
  
  


 **"Supreme Leader** , sir, we were able to track down the missing vessel." An officer spoke as Kylo stood anxiously on the bridge besides Phasma, focus snapping over to the officer.

"Where is it?" He hissed, eyeing them through narrowed eyes as his fists clenched.

"It appears to be in Coruscant... But we were able to log into the data and records of the inside cameras and it appears that the ship has been abandoned..." They calmly spoke as Kylo's heart skipped a beat. "There are no life forms."

Breathing in heavily, feeling his head become far too light for his own body, Kylo lost all ability to focus. Feeling his chest ache as his hands began to shake, Phasma turned to look at him, words slipping through her modulator but entering one of Kylo's ears and exiting the other.

"Supreme Leader?" Phasma called out, but Kylo wasn't responding. Instead, his breathing grew louder and more audible as he stumbled in his spot, swatting away anyone who tried to help him. "Supreme Leader?!" Watching Kylo waver in his spot as he tried to rush off, he only fell forward and fell over the bridge, landing right beside the officers bellow.

Rushing to his side and demanding her nearby troopers to retrieve a medical droid, Phasma checked Kylo's pulse and sighed in relief when she found one before lifting him up in her arms, enough to get him off of the bridge.

In a matter of minutes, the droids rushed in with a cot to push Kylo to the medical wing, Phasma sticking close by and not daring anything or anyone to get in the way. If Phasma was one thing, she was very loyal to Kylo.

"What happened to him?" A nurse asked as Kylo was settled on a bed, vitals being checked.

"He looked as if he was suffering a panic attack. I've seen plenty, never have I seen them faint. Usually it leads to hurling or excess sweating... Sometimes collapsing to their knees—if that." Phasma explained, arms crossed, looking down at a 'resting' Kylo.

"Was he trying to flee the area?" The nurse asked, Phasma breathing in before nodding. "Panic attacks tend to provoke our fight or flight senses. The Supreme Leader was probably trying to leave as fast as he could, straining himself too much and making him severely lightheaded... Of course, that is my theory."

Waking up in a panic, Kylo eyed the room in confusion, only for Phasma to grab his hand. "Supreme Leader, everything is alright. You are in the medical bay, you fainted." She explained.

"Why? Why?!" He frantically asked, sitting up, taking deep breaths.

"You were suffering from a panic attack. I need you to focus on your breathing." Phasma calmly spoke, keeping his hand in hers.

"The Princess, where's the Princess?" Kylo asked, chest heaving as he looked up at Phasma.

"We have yet to find her." She said, lowly.

"I need to find her!" He shouted, snatching his hand from Phasma, removing what was attached to him and jumping off of the bed.

"Ren! It is not safe for you—" Before Phasma could finish, Kylo had run right out the door, not questioning the fact that he no longer had his cape, gloves... or even his shirt on. He ran, sprinted right out, ignoring all sorts of yells and medical orders as he aimed for the hangar.

He had to get to Coruscant.


	13. Kamino

**Everything**  sounded muffled, faint voices and hums, the noises all blending together as you groaned. Your head ached, your body shivered. You were freezing. Where was Kylo's cape?

Forcing your eyes open, you gasped as you instantly sat up, regretting it as you felt lightheaded and nauseous.

Clutching your head as you leaned against a wall, you eyed your surroundings. Silver walls, one large window across from you, and... lots of bright lights blinding you. Everything was white. Too much white.

Blinking a few times to adjust your eyes, you rubbed your arms as your body trembled, only to feel bare skin. Looking down, your heart sank as you realized you were lacking in coverage: what seemed to be a white bandage wrapped around your chest and hips to cover up your privates and nothing more. You felt uncomfortable and insanely out of place. Who had undressed you? Who  _dressed_  you?

And where were you?!

Eyeing the room you were in, seeing not a lick of furniture within it, you took in deep breaths. Why did it look as if you were a lab experiment rather than what you assumed to be a prisoner?

"She has woken up!" Someone spoke, you hearing their voice through what seemed to be a speaker, you looking up and trying to find it. "May we proceed?"

Looking around, then ahead, you spotted a small group huddle in the distance, looking in. "She is not an experiment, you numbskull!"

"Then why is she in the lab?!" The same person asked.

"She may be the perfect one to clone for  our officers."

"We don't even know if the cloning will work! Those records are all practically prehistoric to us! Our technology has changed. And we don't use clones anymore!"

"Which is a  _mistake_!"

"Be quiet!" Hearing a familiar voice, your heart fell to your feet. "You all are well aware of why she is truly here. We must keep her far away from that beast for as long as we can."

"I don't understand the importance of this. She has been separated as it is for so long, why does it matter now?"

"It's nearly been ten years! It will mark the anniversary and things will start up again. They will wear out. All things have a timer. She can not find about the truth!"

"You want her all to yourself! That's why!"

"Shut your trap! Do not forget who helps fund this facility and help it stay good as new!"

Overhearing the conversation as you stared with wide eyes and parted lips, you sucked in a breath. Whatever they were going on about had to have been about you and you couldn't understand as to why you were of so much importance... You weren't even married to Kylo Ren yet!

Hearing a panel slide open, your head snapped over to a pair of large men aiming for you as Daniel spoke up, "We will begin our experiments now."  
  
  
  


**Coruscant**  wasn't a foreign city to Kylo, he knew it very well. He had visited it often as a child and even for missions for the First Order. Although a hectic and crowded planet, he knew his way around. But, with the help of the tracking device implanted on all First Order vessels, Kylo was able to land his shuttle on the same platform.

Rushing off the ramp, spotting the first civilian he saw and knocking them into a space craft, he stole their tunic and pulled it right on.

Eyeing his surroundings with heavy breaths, he spotted the familiar, marked, First Order shuttle. It was still open, as if it were just abandoned not long before and no one had taken the chance to steal it. Sprinting up to it and rushing up the ramp, Kylo searched every corner for evidence, only to find the escape latch open. "Smart girl..." he muttered to himself, jumping right through and hoping to find you.

If he were you... where would he have gone? He couldn't be out in the open, that would give him away...  _The shadows_.

Quickly walking over, eyeing the alleys and any doorways, something shined underneath the moonlight and caught his attention. Narrowing his eyebrows and aiming for it, Kylo crouched before it and lifted it in his fingers. A vile.

Clenching his fist around it and standing to his feet, snarling as he searched for anyone, he spotted a droid and charged up to it. "Where did the people in that ship go?!" He shouted, pointing at the vessel. "Where did they go?!" He yelled as the droid whirred, panicking and slowly backing up. "What do you mean you don't know?! You're here! Do you work here?!" Hearing it's response, Kylo growled. "You useless droid! You work here and—"

"Supreme Leader." Hearing a familiar voice, Kylo snapped his head over and saw Phasma with a pair of stormtroopers. "You need a clear mind, you will not find Y/N if you keep acting on impulses."

Sucking in heavy breaths, Kylo opened up his palm and showed Phasma the vile. "I found this near the ship. She was trying to escape."

"A vile?" Phasma eyed it.

"It carries toxins in it that paralyze the body and knock the vessel unconscious." Kylo explained. "At least... I'm sure it does..."

Sighing, Phasma gestured for a trooper to grab it from Kylo. "Take it back to the base and make sure the medical doctors eye it. Take the shuttle, I will join the Supreme Leader." She ordered as they nodded. "We will find her."

Gulping as he eyed Phasma, he gave her a single nod before she turned away, eyeing her surroundings before spotting someone. "You." She called out, a man tending to a spacecraft looked up and nearly jumped at the sight of the chrome armor. "Where did the people in that ship go?" Phasma asked, pointing at the abandoned Order vessel.

"I— I—"

Lifting her blaster and aiming it, Phasma calmly spoke, "I will not ask my question again."

Blinking, the man looked in between Phasma and Kylo, sucking in a deep breath. "They— They took a ship—"

" _Where_?" Phasma snapped.

"Kamino! They— Kamino!" They jumped as Phasma placed her finger on the trigger. "I overheard the man tell someone else they were leaving to Kamino!"

"Was anyone else with them?" Phasma continued on as the man swallowed.

"A— A woman... She— She was unconscious—"

"Who had her?!" Kylo snapped, now stepping in as Phasma stood her ground.

"A— A man in all black! A black shirt and pants with blonde curly hair and— and a beard!" They flinched.

"That trooper. The one she calls Daniel." Kylo snarled before turning around and storming off, aiming for his shuttle as Phasma lowered her blaster.

"You speak of this to no one." At that, Phasma followed Kylo, into the command shuttle and towards the canopy. "What are you going to do?"

"Go to Kamino." Kylo blatantly stated, already lifting off and not wanting to wait any longer.

"Clearly, but what is your plan? Do you have a plan or are you working on impulse?" Phasma asked, eyeing him.

Sucking in a breath, Kylo made the ship jump into light speed. "Murder anyone who gets in my way, including that useless stormtrooper, and find the princess."

"That... sounds very much like a Kylo Ren plan..." Phasma mumbled, removing her helmet and settling it on the ground beside her feet. "Now that I have that off..." Looking over at Kylo, Phasma arched an eyebrow. "What did you do to Y/N?"

Narrowing his eyebrows, Kylo looked over at Phasma. "What—"

"What. Did. You. Do. To. Y/N?" She asked as Kylo's jaw tightened, just about to look away, but Phasma caught his chin. "No one else is around to see me treat you like the damn little brother you are to me so tell me what did your dumbass do to her?"

"I am your Supreme Leader, you can't—" Before he could even finish, Phasma arched an eyebrow. Sucking in a breath, Kylo grumbled, "I yelled at her."

"You  _what_?" Phasma glared.

"I yelled at her and called her a nuisance and said said she was nothing!" He exclaimed as Phasma gave him a dirty look, causing him to slump in his seat.

"Why...?"

"Because... she took one of my paintings—"

"ARE YOU—?!" Sucking in a breath, Phasma rubbed her face. "Give me one good reason as to why you think you had the right to yell at Y/N for taking one of your forsaken paintings? And give me one good reason as to why I shouldn't slap you into another system for calling the princess a nuisance and no one?"

"Because!" Kylo stomped.

"Because?" Phasma squinted her eyes. "Because you're a fool who actually likes someone for once and you can't fathom the idea?"

Stubbornly looking away, Kylo shook his head. "No." He snarled. "I did it because she took a painting of mine that was hidden and I had to destroy it because she saw it!" Kylo snapped as Phasma punched his arm. "Kriff!"

"You're— You're an imbecile! You—" Pulling at her hair, Phasma groaned. "Is it not obvious that she's trying her best with you even though she's forced into this marriage like you are? Is it not obvious that she's afraid of the new environment she's in but she's trying her best to blend in?! Is it not obvious that she's trying her best to be your ONLY friend?!"

Blinking, Kylo quietly breathed in, looking ahead and focusing on piloting. He knew Phasma was right and he couldn't counter that. He couldn't go against what was true. Instead, he sat in silence as Phasma nearly panted, feeling the heat within her face. She wasn't entirely furious in the man, knowing he had a number of problems on his shoulders... but she was bothered in the fact that a practical  _space angel_  like you was being treated the way you were all because Kylo was afraid.

"You care for her. If you hadn't, you wouldn't be doing this, dropping it all to bring her home." Phasma spoke up, knowing very well how stubborn her superior was. "You do. You have been. Since the first day you met her, I'm sure. I may not have seen it all, but I know you, Ren. I know you better than anyone else in the Order."

Huffing, Kylo rubbed his face before leaning back in his seat. "What do you want me to say?"

"Nothing. Just be true to yourself." She breathed. "You don't have to admit to anything, not to me, but do it for yourself."

Sucking in a breath, Kylo shifted his eyes to the right where Phasma was before looking back out to the open space. "We'll arrive on Kamino soon."  
  
  
  


**Struggling**  in your spot, wrists and ankles strapped down, your heart raced as your eyebrows narrowed. Eyeing the droids surrounding you, bright lights nearly blinding you, you thrashed around. "Why— Why are you doing this to me?!" You shouted, lifting your head and seeing Daniel standing at the end of the cot.

"There is so much you need to learn about. Well...  _remember_." He snickered as you blinked, taking in deep breaths. "But, of course, you are a  _princess_. An  _intellectual_. You have the brains and they are going to waste by just being a wife! So why not test you out, study your DNA and all that stuff, maybe you can be one of our clone originals!" Daniel spoke with enthusiasm as you gulped.

"Why me? Why not someone else?" You nearly whispered.

"You have got to be kidding me." Daniel laughed. "No one will miss you! Kylo Ren won't even bother coming after you! I just removed the weight from his shoulders, my dear. Your so called parents gave you up like  _that_!" He snapped his fingers as you flinched.

"That's... not true." Your voice cracked, eyebrows vibrating from how tight you had been furrowing them.

"Not true? Why else would you run away from him so easily? Why else would he call you a nuisance? Nothing?"

"You heard?" You nearly whispered.

"Of course I heard! I heard it all! I can not  _believe_  Ren got so upset over a  _stupid_  painting! It's obvious he was more upset in something else than just a painting. He isn't that possessive over foolish things... maybe lightsabers." Daniel laughed as you frowned. "Ren is a complete fool. He had you right there, being so nice even though he didn't deserve it."

"He was being nice to me." You defended. "Until he..." Stopping yourself, you gulped.

"Aren't you the same one who said that... you weren't there to change him? To make him a good person? That you just wanted him to realize that there is more to life than being angry so often?" Daniel asked as you stayed silent. "You did..."

"But I am not trying to change him!" You exclaimed. "I am just showing him that there are people out there who are genuinely nice! That life isn't about pain and anger, nor suffering or trauma! That everyone can find love in some way!"

"And life isn't all about sunshine and rainbows, dear princess, but you like to make it seem that way!" Daniel spat as you sealed your mouth shut. "Kylo Ren is an evil man, he is a monster of his own creation. He had lovely parents and a family of his own. He allowed Snoke to manipulate him. Allowed the darkness to take him over! That is why he is the way that he is and you can't change that!"

Feeling your body tremble at the way Daniel raised your voice, you bit down on your inner lip before speaking. "But I can help him realize that life isn't just black and white."


	14. Escape

**Rain**  was blurring every and anything in the distance, only so much being shown from within the mist. Kylo didn't question how easy it was to land his shuttle on the landing platforms of the facility.

The sun was setting and gave an orange hue across the "city" of structures built within and above the strong waters. Kylo didn't give himself time to think, instead he stood up and slammed his fist against a button to lower the ramp.

"Are you just going to storm in?" Phasma asked. "You don't even know where she is, Ren."

"I'll kill anyone that gets in my way and dare holds back her location." He spoke over his shoulder before sprinting down the ramp and into the rain. It didn't take long for someone to find him. The area was guarded by numerous amounts of posted man. Of course, nothing like the stormtroopers, much less armor and skill, so it was easy for Kylo to wipe them out if they even flinched in his direction.

Following shortly behind, on occasion firing her blaster if someone came from behind, Phasma watched as Kylo stormed his way through like a hurricane. He didn't think twice on his actions, didn't look back at those who called—Phasma didn't expect this of him. He was determined, he had one goal... She just wasn't sure if Kylo would find what he needed. You.

You may have been on Kamino, but you could've been anywhere. Phasma wasn't quite sure why he landed on one random platform without a strategic plan, but a piece of her believed it was the Force  _generously_  guiding her Supreme Leader.

Dripping from head to toe in rain water, swinging his lightsaber around while Force choking any of those not in his reach, tossing them to a side, Kylo listened to his instincts and followed them. Not a destination in mind, but his feet were moving as if they had one. He was going to find you, even if that meant killing off every last human and creature there was in his path.   
  
  
  


**Biting**   **down**  on the cloth they wrapped around your head to muffle your screams, you squeezed your eyes shut as you shifted uncomfortably in your spot. Your skin was on fire and your body ached, your throat was scratchy from all your painful yells as the droids prodded and nipped away at your skin and mind. You wouldn't dare eye the tools they used, afraid to make the situation worse... even if anticipation was just as bad.

You were starting to grow exhausted, your body unable to take the pain as your lungs ached from all your heavy breathing. The desire to escape was dwindling and falling thin as you knew there was no chance with the lack of strength you now had. No one would save you, no one would feel bad for you, you were going to be trapped there and used as a blueprint for clones.

A piece of you prayed that, by the faith of the Force and stars, something would happen. Something or someone would slip and it would give you your chance towards freedom. 

And then, you heard it. A painful, blood churning, scream. And all the droids turned away as Daniel snarled. "Someone find out what that was!" He pointed, the droids dropping everything as they rushed right out, leaving you with him. "Don't think for a second this is your chance to escape, sweetheart." Daniel seethed as you eyed him with a blurry vision.

Hearing more screams and the sounds of alarms going off, Daniel cursed under his breath. His time was limited and, if it was someone after you, he had to leave immediately.

Loosening up your restraints, forcing you to your feet as you trembled, Daniel dragged you along with him as you hissed in pain from your throbbing ankle.

"Hurry up! You will not stay behind here, don't think of it!" Daniel snapped as you narrowed your eyes, snatching your arm from his grip and kneeing him in the groin, hard enough for him to hunch forward as you ran off.

You bit down the pain in your ankle, fought through the discomfort all over your skin as you sprinted down the halls, shoving those out of your way as they blocked your path. You needed to get far, to find a ship or something to get you away from wherever the hell you were.

"Someone stop that mad woman! Stop her!" Daniel yelled from afar, you looking over and gasping.

Turning your focus back ahead, you turned a few corners, only to be shoved against a wall by a pair of armed men. The same from earlier. "Get— Get off of me!" You grunted, trying to fight them off.

"Don't move!" One shouted, aiming their blaster at you.

Huffing, you instantly ducked and kicked them in the groin, using their own hand to fire the blaster at the other before firing at themselves. You had never killed before and you didn't have time to ponder over it. Your heart was racing and your own life was on the line. It was either you or them. And it was  _not_  going to be you.

Rushing out a door that slid open, you were suddenly soaked from the rain fall that raged above. Looking up to see the darkening sky as the sun began to set, you looked ahead and realized it was a dead end. Nothing but a makeshift balcony that overlooked the roaring ocean and its heavy waves.

"There is no way out of this my dear princess." Hearing Daniel speak, you slowly turned to face him. "If you come with me now, I promise it will be less painful."

Panting, you shook your head. "You're lying. Like I would ever join you again." You spat.

"What? Do you think you could return to Ren? A man who neglects you?"

"At least he wouldn't torture me." You snarled, adrenaline pumping through your veins and keeping you on your feet before all else failed you.

"That's where you're wrong. See, Ren is a vicious beast. He does kidnap and torture. He does harm and kill. He doesn't think twice on his actions. If he could, he would kill you, princess." Daniel frowned, but you shook your head, not believing him.

"I will not believe your twisted words any longer. I should've known since day one you were nothing but trouble. Manipulating me, making it seem like you were better! But you're not, you are far worse!" You spat.

Lifting his hand and aiming a blaster, you gulped. "Do not make me  _severely_  injure you, dear princess."

"You are twisted." You shook your head. "I rather die than you keep me as your toy." Taking a few steps back, Daniel lurched forward but you were already free falling into the water, crashing harshly and being sucked under before resurfacing as the heavy waves pushed you away.

"You damn fool!" Daniel shouted, tossing his blaster and jumping right in.

You tried swimming away, tried to go against the current, but it failed you. Instead, Daniel was growing closer to you as you tried moving away. But, you weren't quick enough and the waves were too strong, bringing Daniel towards you as you frantically tried diving.

"I would rather kill you myself!" He shouted, grabbing you by your hair as you hissed.

Trying to fight his grip off of you, gasping as you tried staying afloat, Daniel shoved you underneath the water as you shrieked. You kicked and punched, pushing him away so you could resurface, but he wouldn't let go.

Gripping on to his clothing and tugging him down with you, you forced your way up, slamming your fist against his nose, whimpering from the contact. Shoving his hand off of you, kicking his stomach, you grabbed his hair and shoved him down before he could reach for you. You placed your entire weight on him, crying as he clawed at your thighs and slammed his palms against your stomach, but you didn't allow yourself to waver. You held him underneath you for as long as you could, until you felt his movements die out.

Letting go and pushing away, trying to get as far away from his unconscious—possibly dead—body, you looked around, trying to find the facility. "Help!" You yelled. "Someone! Help!" Nearly being knocked over the waves you grunted. "Help!" Waving your hands while trying to keep yourself above the surface, your adrenaline was starting to waver in you, wearing thin as your exhaustion kicked in.

"Princess!" Hearing a voice call out, your heart skipped a beat.

"I'm here! I'm over— I'm over here!" You shouted. "Please!"

"Princess!" Following the voice as you blinked away the rain water, your heart skipped a beat at the sight of the man in the distance, instantly recognizing the figure.

"Kylo!" You yelled, his name slipping your tongue as if you had said it plenty of times before. "Kylo!" Taking in a deep breath, you began to swim his way.

Watching your figure in the distance, Kylo took in heavy breaths, chest heaving. His heart was racing, watching you inch closer and closer, just about ready to kneel to help you. That is until something in the distance caught his eye, moving towards you. "PRINCESS!"

Seeing where Kylo was looking, you were about to turn, only to be dragged under the waves and deep into the water.

The moment you disappeared from his sight, Kylo dove right in, swimming as far as he could, watching the figure keep you underneath as you struggled to fight. Kicking your foot against their grip and face, trying to free yourself. But nothing worked.

Reaching out, trying to swim deeper and closer to you, Kylo noticed your movements die out as you grew weaker and weaker, unable to hold your breath. Turning his focus down to whatever or whoever was pulling you, he saw Daniel with a mouth piece, pulling your soon-to-be unconscious body.

Waving his hand in the water, the mouth piece was snatched from Daniels mouth before Kylo clenched his fist, quickening the process for the man as he choked out, bubbles leaving his mouth as his grip left you. In a matter of seconds, Daniel grew still as Kylo reached for you, swimming back to the surface and gasping for air.

Holding you in his arm as you hung there, unconscious, Kylo took in deep breaths. "PHASMA!" He yelled. "PHASMA!" Feeling the waves becoming stronger, he looked up and eyed the shuttle lowering onto the water—Phasma being two steps ahead of him.

Swimming over and handing you to Phasma as she helped your still body into the shuttle, Kylo then followed suit, falling to his knees beside you. "I can handle this." Phasma said, kneeling and helping you breathe once again, Kylo watching with a racing heart and a tight jaw.

Coughing out, wincing at how harshly you were letting it out, you suddenly saw a blonde woman before you, your eyes trailing down to her armor and recognizing it. Phasma.

Then, your eyes shifted to the left of where a man sat on his knees beside you. Kylo.

They had come for you.  _He_  had come for you when you almost believed that no one would.

Carelessly reaching for Kylo, you pulled him to you as you wrapped your arms tightly around him, catching him off guard as he grunted.

Feeling you tremble against him, Kylo carefully sat you up in his arms as he slowly embraced you back, foreign to the feeling but succumbing to your touch.

Standing up and retrieving a pair of blankets, Phasma draped either one on both you and Kylo. "We're going back home." She spoke up, walking back to the canopy.

You had a vice grip around Kylo, not daring to let go out of fear of being taken once again. He had come for you, he had found you, and with the help of Phasma, you were safe. All that had happened before with him nearly went out the window. You knew there was something there, within his soul, that wanted something more than just power.

And never did you think you'd consider Kylo as a friend.

"Thank you..." you whispered into his chest, the wet shirt sticking to you as you held fistfuls of it. Kylo kept the blanket wrapped around you as his draped his shoulders, looking down at you and eyeing your shaking frame.

So much had happened at once that he hadn't truly realized what he had done: chasing after you, killing those in his way, bringing you home. A part of him tried convincing himself that he did it because you were to be his  _wife_. But a bigger part knew he did it because he wouldn't dare let you get hurt. Ever. Even if it was a bit too late.

All that mattered now, was that you were safe.


	15. Return

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> um, hi! I decided to post black beauty twice a week now, now that I have so much already written and saved up! enjoy!

**A violent**  tremor woke you up from the sleep you couldn't remember taking. Your body shivered at the realization that you were still wet, lifting your head enough to realize you were still in Kylo's arms... except, now, seated on his lap.

"We're here." Phasma announced, holding her helmet in her arm before pulling it over her head.

You peeled yourself from the man, trying to stand up, only to stumble and instantly fall back into his grip as Phasma reached for you. Your body had outdone itself from all the running and swimming, you needed more sleep.

Lifting you in his arms as Phasma lowered the ramp, Kylo walked down and completely ignored the looks from technicians and pilots, as well as the few stormtroopers that worked along the palace's hangar.

"I'll send a blockade of troops to Kamino if you'd like." Phasma spoke up as she walked alongside Kylo. "Get as much information as I can before shutting it down." Giving her a single nod, Phasma bowed her head before looking over at you. "Welcome back home."

Giving her a soft smile, you nodded, watching Phasma walk away as Kylo left in the opposite direction. "You will be staying in my quarters from now on." He said, snapping you out of your thoughts. You nearly had forgotten of whose arms you were in, almost forgetting the fact that you had technically ran away...

Choosing to stay silent as you sat in his arms, the hand that clutched a fistful of his shirt loosened up as it slid down to your lap. You couldn't help but keep your head low, knowing you were going to be reprimanded in some way. He was going to keep you in his room so he knew you'd never run off again. Maybe he wouldn't allow you access into his study anymore... You frowned at the thought, not realizing that Kylo was eyeing you.

Entering his quarters and settling you on his couch, Kylo knelt before you, studying your face before reaching for your blanket. Just before he could pull it off, you clutched onto it as your eyebrows narrowed. "I want to make sure you're okay." He lowly spoke, looking you in the eyes. "I need to see your... skin."

Sucking in a breath as you kept your eyes locked on his, you slowly nodded, loosening your grip as he pulled the blanket away. Your body shivered as you wrapped your arms together, eyes not leaving his own as he reached out. Feeling his gloved hands carefully hold onto your arms, turning them as his eyes lowered to study them, you gulped. "They injected me... I don't know how many times..." you whispered, shaking in his grip. "I was being— I was jabbed at and— and I don't know what else, I couldn't watch but it hurt..." your voice cracked as Kylo tightened his jaw, seeing all the incisions and red blotches, carefully rubbing his thumb over them.

"Do they hurt?" He asked and you shook your head. Looking at you and seeing the terrified expression in your eyes, Kylo took in a deep breath. He wanted to apologize, knowing if he hadn't pushed you away as he always had, you wouldn't have been so close to Daniel. Or, maybe you would have. But, he knew, if he hadn't scared you off, you definitely wouldn't have ran away and ended up the situation you were in.

"Daniel wanted to run away, told me his plan. I didn't agree with it, I wanted to stay with our people... but then..." Shaking your head, knowing very well that Kylo knew where the conversation was going, you sighed.

"I went back to him and decided to join him, working on impulse... he told me he was with the Resistance and I— I believed it. But a part of me had already regretted my decision. Things Phasma had told me echoing in my head about you. And then we landed on Coruscant, I overheard the truth that he wanted nothing more than to use me... to rid me from you..." you trailed, looking down, but Kylo lifted you chin, as if gesturing for you to continue on.

"I tried running away but— I don't know, I collapsed." You breathed as Kylo furrowed his eyebrows. The vile. You hadn't known you had been injected. "And then I woke up on Kamino, terrified... they experimented on me and I— When the opportunity came, I ran. I tried to escape. I— I killed two men." You choked, a few tears slipping as Kylo wiped them away. Your heart skipped a beat at the gesture, but not daring to push it away.

"And then Daniel found me, I escaped by jumping into the water, he followed and almost drowned me. But I drowned him... thought I did and then... well, you know the rest."

Taking in a deep breath as he lowered his hand, you then caught it and held onto it, causing Kylo's heart to skip a beat. "I'm sorry."

"No." He instantly shook his head, standing up from his position and looking down at you as gave him a worried look. "You're safe now. No one will dare hurt you."

Blinking a few times, you nodded. "Thank you..."

Looking down at you, Kylo leaned in and kissed the top of your head, slipping his hand from your own before holding your chin. "I won't risk losing you again... even if it was my fault..."

Feeling your heart flutter, knowing that was a lot for him to say, you nodded.

"I'll set up a bath for you so you don't strain your body too much." Kylo said, walking away from you and over to the washroom.

Looking over at him and watching him walk away, you realized this was the first time you had ever seen his chambers. Much like your own except it had far more books and... even more paintings piled up against walls. You were curious, wanting to see them, but you were still walking on eggshells with him. You didn't want to upset him.

Walking over to you, Kylo helped you up and carefully walked you to the washroom, settling you at the edge of the tub before leaving your seat. "Wait—" Seeing Kylo turn, you gulped. "Can you... Can you leave the door open? I don't... I'm afraid something could happen. I feel safer that way..." You pleaded, Kylo giving you a single nod before making sure the door wouldn't close behind him.

"I will be in the living room." At that, he left your sight.

Undoing the makeshift outfit, stripping to your bare skin, you slowly entered the warm water and sank into it. There was a sudden sense of ease and relief the moment the sud filled water coated your skin. For a moment, all worries slipped away as you lowered yourself deeper into the water, enough to reach your nose as it warmed your freezing skin. Leaning back in the large tub—one you hadn't realized how truly large it was—you stretched out your legs and sank deeper, enough to reach your eyes. Shutting them, you went all the way under, drenching your body from head to toe in the calming affects of the bath.

_"I would rather kill you myself!"_

Hearing Daniel's words, almost as if they were spoken freshly in your ear, you opened your eyes in a panic, jumping out of the water and feeling your heart race. "Princess?!" Panting, your head snapped over to the door to see Kylo standing there. "What happened?"

"H— Huh?" You gulped, wiping your hair away from your face as Kylo eyed you with concern in his eyes.

"You yelled." He told you as you then looked down, frowning.

"I went underwater... and I thought I heard Daniel telling me he'd kill me himself..."You nearly whispered, breathing steadying out as did your heart rate.

Eyeing you, the way your hair dripped with water, how the droplets slid down your cheeks and hung at your eyelashes, Kylo took a few steps forward before speaking. "Daniel is dead, he can't do you anymore harm no matter what your mind is telling you. You are  _safe_  here. No one will dare hurt you or kidnap you or even  _think_  of harming you. I promise you that, princess." He said, eyes locked on to your own. "I will rip anyone, limb from limb, if they dare lay a finger on you."

Seeing the intensity in his eyes, the truth that underlined his words, you gave him a small nod. He wouldn't lie to such an extent, why would he? Kylo Ren—the Supreme Leader could careless about everyone else, so saying what he had... you knew he meant it.

"Remember that." Kylo said. "You are  _safe_  with  _me_." At that, he turned and left you be, his presence lingering as you knew he wouldn't be too far off.

Taking in a deep breath, Kylo leaned his back against he wall parallel to that of the washrooms door, tilting his head back as he felt his heart race. He had never jumped to anything so quickly as he did when he heard you yell. He didn't even think twice, working on impulse and making sure you were okay. And, he had a promise to keep: keeping you safe.

Kylo shut his eyes, trying to steady his breathing as he thought about you. The way you looked at him, as if  _he_  were your last hope. As if  _he_  was all you got... even though he treated you like space debris.

He regretted it. A great piece of him did. Treating you the way he had, pushing you away. All because Kylo Ren wasn't accustomed to such emotions. Yet, here he was, wanting nothing more than your safety and well-being. It being his top priority.

And the reasoning of you being his future wife was at the bottom of his list of why he was having a change of heart.

Not realizing how long he had been standing there, deep in thought, Kylo heard gentle footsteps approach him as he looked to the right, Seeing you emerge from the washroom in nothing but a towel wrapped around your figure. Turning his whole body to face you, eyeing your skin and seeing the markings were no longer there... but, the look in your eyes were a dead giveaway that you still  _felt_  them.

And either the sad look that reflected off of your eyes, tears being strained, Kylo's heart felt as if it cracked down the middle. The vulnerability and pain seen within your soft eyes killed him. In the end, if he hadn't scared you away, you wouldn't have felt such way. It was  _his_  fault.

Standing in silence, staring at one another, you watched as Kylo took a step closer, reaching out and holding your face. "It's okay to cry..." He said, but you couldn't help but look away, feeling shameful.

But, instead of allowing you to stubbornly ignore your emotions, Kylo pulled you into his chest. You stood there, staring blankly at his chest, body beginning to tremble as your grip around your towel tightened. One by one, your tears slipped before you full on cried into his damp shirt, shaking in your spot as Kylo held tightly onto you. "I'm sorry..." Your voice squeaked as Kylo's chest tightened.

"Don't apologize." He said through tight teeth. "Don't ever apologize when none of it is your fault. There's no need." Gently pushing you off of him, Kylo walked away as your breath hitched, wiping your tears before you felt his presence before you once again "Change into this. I will request a droid to bring in your clothes. For now, relax. I will be in the refresher."

Looking at the shirt in Kylo's hand, you took it before looking up at him. "Thank you..." Giving you a single nod, Kylo turned and entered the washroom as you loosened your grip around the towel, pulling his shirt in over your head as it covered your frame, exposing some of your chest but hung past your thighs.

Lifting the shirt and bringing it to your nose, you shivered at the familiar scent. A scent that almost seemed as if you had known it your whole life. A scent that felt like... home.

Gulping, you walking around the bed and sat at the edge of it, looking out the window and seeing the sun set as the snow fell. For once, the base felt like home to you.


	16. Snowfall

**Steam**  filled the washroom as Kylo showered, the man not expecting to take so long as most of it was spent  _thinking_. Thinking about  _you_.

About your well being, about your mentality, about you as a whole.

About  _his_  feelings for  _you_.

Kylo's heart was racing faster than ever, all because he knew he felt something for you that wasn't just a desire for friendship... but a desire for  _more_. He knew, deep down within his poorly lit heart, that you could never and would never feel the same. It wasn't in you. It would  _never_  be in you. It shouldn't be a desire of yours.

Resting his head against the showered wall, sucking in a breath, he shut his eyes. Although he was relieved now, knowing you were safe and in walking distance, he couldn't help but feel that lingering anxiety. The way his heart sank at the simple thought—the memory—of you being somewhere far from his reach. Being in danger. Nearly drowning. He had never felt his adrenaline rush as fast as it did when he saw you get dragged under water.

Lifting his head and standing up straight, Kylo raked his fingers through his hair, pushing it over his head as he breathed in to steady his heart. You were there. You were safe. And he had nothing to worry about... So why did the feeling linger?

Looking to the left of him, rubbing his hand against the foged, glass shower door, he eyed the vastness of his quarters apparent through the opened washroom door. Like before, he left it open in case you need him—even as he showered. A part of him wanted you to wander around, to curiously peek in and see him—

_No, you half-witted nerfherder!_

Rubbing his face, then covering his mouth with both of his hands, he looked down at his lower abdomen and grew wide eyed, yelling into his hand "kriff!" After so long, now was when he got hard? With you right outside? With the door wide open? He almost wanted to cry, feeling like an overly hormonal teenager. He couldn't seem to go a day without masturbating.

Turning the knob all the way to the right, making the water temperature lower, his body began to shiver as the piercing cold water pelted his bare skin. Groaning, Kylo wanted nothing more than to smash his head into the refresher's wall if that meant he'd stop feeling such way.

Pressing your knees together with your palms pressed into the mattress, you stared out at the snow, completely entranced in the beauty of nature. It kept you at bay, your focus set on it rather than what had happened not too long before. Sucking in a breath, with a small tilt in your head, you thought about Kylo.

And then, Phasma's words.

If he truly was upset at you for, quote unquote stealing his painting, he wouldn't have gone out of his way to find you. Wouldn't have made you a priority... And definitely wouldn't remind you of how safe you were.

You couldn't help but smile, maybe there was a chance of finding a friend in him. Maybe he was starting to see and understand the lightness that life held. The good in it. The idea of  _caring_  for someone.

Hearing the sound of the washroom's door close, your heart sank, instantly looking over and suddenly feeling the heat rise to your face. Seeing Kylo stand there, holding his towel low at his hips, using his freehand to comb through his wet hair, you gulped. You then eyed the fresh water dripping down his neck and collar bone, along his toned chest and abdomen, causing you to take in a deep breath. And then your eyes trailed lower, down the happy trail and...

 _Oh no_...

Making eye contact with him as your heart shot right out of your chest, you snapped your head back towards the window as you buried your hands in between your thighs, shoving the overly sized shirt with them. You needed your underwear... or the washroom.

Eyeing you from behind, the way his shirt fell off one of your shoulders, exposing it, Kylo bit down. He did not need another cold shower. One was enough. "I'll request a droid to deliver your clothes. You can take the other half of my closet." Kylo spoke, you nodding, not bothering to look over, afraid to sound like a fool.

"Thank you." You lowly spoke, Kylo watching you, eyes narrowing for a moment as you kept your focus out the window. Was his  _wet body_  not intriguing enough? Was falling snow more impressive? He couldn't help but huff in annoyance.

A silence weaved between the two of you and your sense of time went out the window—as did your focus—you couldn't seem to even put together the snow you had been staring at.

Slowly turning your head, seeing as Kylo was in the small kitchen held within his quarters, you eyed the expanse of his back; his broad shoulders, exposed shoulder blades, the dip of his back and the back dimples. You could've sworn your heart made it to where the heat was collecting in between your thighs, of course, that is until you heard a knock on the door.

The droid.

Looking away once again as Kylo waved a hand for the droid to enter, he pointed in the direction as to where the droid should leave your clothing, hovering baskets filled with your gowns and such being pushed towards the designated area.

Watching as the droid placed every bit of clothing away before leaving without a sound, Kylo looked over at you, your focus still out the window. Walking over to you, Kylo sucked in a small breath. "Would you like to go see it?"

Hearing his gruff voice, you blinked a few times, looking up at him and nodding, knowing exactly what he meant. Standing up, you aimed for the closet to change, pulling on something warm while topping it off with a cloak—slightly disappointed that you no longer had Kylo's cape to add.

Emerging from the washroom, bundled up and ready, Kylo was in the midst of pulling his gloves on as you stood there and watched, patiently waiting.

Feeling your presence, Kylo turned, eyeing you before reaching his hand out for you to take. As you did, he guided you out of his quarters and towards the terrace of the palace, hand slipping from your own as he adjusted his cape, you staying close and not too far. You were afraid to, even if Kylo swore you'd be safe with him.

Walking in silence, closely beside one another, you eyed the darkening sky as the sun had been setting. You admired the colorful hues as the snow fell beautifully onto your skin and surroundings. Although not gone for too long, you still missed the snow when you were surrounded by the hot city or the constant rainfall.

As the two of you continued to walk, around the frozen garden and ponds, you rubbed your hands together, breathing into them as Kylo kept his attention ahead. Stoic as ever... that is until you slid your hand into his.

Feeling your hand in his, Kylo took in a deep breath through his nose as he kept his focus ahead. He could almost feel the faint fear that radiated from you as your grip tightened, staying close to his figure as you walked alongside him.

You believed him when he said you were safe. You believed  _him_.

Did this mean you trusted him?

Wrapping his fingers against your palm, easily engulfing it from the difference in sizes, Kylo guided you along until it came time that the sun had fully set and both of your stomachs began to grumble.

Dinner. How could he have forgotten? He was so caught up in your well being to even pay attention to his. And  _that_  was a first.

Leading you back inside and towards the dining hall, Kylo left your side momentarily to speak to the service droids as you held your own hands together, eyeing your surroundings as if you hadn't seen it before. Returning back to you, Kylo spoke up. "Where would you like to eat?"

Looking up at him, seeing as he waited for your response, you sucked in a breath. "In your quarters?"

"If that is where you feel most comfortable." Kylo said as you nodded. "I will tell the droids."

Watching him walk away, you turned to face the windows of the dining hall. Tall and as long as the walls, illuminated by the moon as the snow continued to fall. You never expected yourself to become so... clingy to Kylo. To be so  _attached_ , yet, it felt so right...

Feeling a hand clutch on to your own, you were tugged away, attention snapping ahead to see the back of Kylo. His dark, wavy hair. The cascading cloak that hid his figure underneath. His gloved hand pulling you with him.

Your heart fluttered. There was something about him, something about Kylo that suddenly captivated you more than ever before. Was it because he saved you that you felt this way? Maybe it was because he was showing that he actually had a heart to listen to rather than nothing to guide him from within his chest...

Whatever it may be, it made your heart race as you couldn't look away from Kylo. He was just your friend—or, at least you had hoped he was that—and nothing more. A man you were  _befriending_.

The moment the two of you made it back to his quarters, the food had arrived shortly after. A pair of droids had set up Kylo's dining table for the two of you before either of you sat down and ate in silence.

The table was small, sat four on each end, and (surprisingly) Kylo had sat right next to you than across. But, no words were exchanged, only subtle glances. Mostly from you to him.

And there was a high possibility that Kylo had been doing the same... A factor as to why you shivered so much.

Once dinner was over and you had thanked him for allowing you to eat within his personal chambers, you excused yourself to prepare for bed. Not such a long process but it was time consuming and soon you found yourself in your silk nightwear, tucked away underneath his sheets on the edge of the bed. You didn't want to disrupt or get in the way of Kylo's sleeping.

Resting quietly on his back, Kylo stared at his ceiling, feeling his eyes grow heavy but his mind growing louder. A part of him wanted to stay awake to make sure you were 100% safe, but another part of him was overly active at such a time and had his mind going to dangerous places.

Sucking in a breath, Kylo's eyebrows narrowed for a moment, turning his head to face your backside. You were still awake, he could feel it. Were you that afraid? That paranoid? Or maybe you were feeling out of place...

Turning his whole body, Kylo reached over to you and pulled you closer to him, with your back pressed into his front as he wrapped his arm protectively around your waist.

For a moment, you froze, wondering if he had done it in his sleep, but then you heard his promising words that made your heart flutter, "You will always be safe with me, no matter where or when."  Nodding your head, you sank deeper into his warmth. "I will stop at nothing to keep you safe. No one will take you from me. No one."

Sucking in a breath, you shut your eyes as you steadied your racing heart. You had wished Kylo showed you this side of him from the very beginning. The hidden bit of him that cared. But, you knew with a man like him who hid under many layers, it took trust and... something frightening to snap him out of his ways. To stop—or lessen out—his coldness towards you over... what you didn't know to be jealousy and self doubt.

That very moment that you truly felt safe and comfortable in his hold and on his bed, you couldn't remember falling asleep. Instead, you woke up in a world that you knew wasn't your own.

Tall grass and flowers surrounded you as you stood to your bare feet, the bright sun beaming down as not a single cloud in the sky covered the vast blueness. Looking around you, your eyes landed on the backside of someone. A man. A tall man with short, black hair, dressed in off white robes. Furrowing your eyebrows and using your hand as a visor, you walked along as your free hand brushed against the nature beside you.

In the distance, you could hear water roaring, the sight of a waterfall that lead to a lake catching your attention as you kept walking towards the figure. Who were they? And why had they yet turn towards you?

Inching closer and closer, you came to a stop, carefully reaching for them as your fingertips brushed against their arm. A sudden shiver rolled down your spine at the contact, your heart skipping a beat before looking up to see the tall figure turn their head.

Squinting your eyes as the sun blinded you, you took a few steps forward in order to see them better.

"Starlight." They spoke, their smile being the only thing you could see. It brought warmth to your chest. A sense of familiarity and... adoration.

Blinking a few times, you reached a hand out to block the sun, only to gasp at the sight before. At who it was.

Your lips formed into his name, but all that came out was a word. A nickname... "Moondust?"


	17. Closeness

"Moondust?" Feeling your heart race at the sight, you were just about to reach forward, but instead, you fell right through. And as you came into contact with the terrain, you jolted awake.

Your heart was pounding in your ears. You knew that face. The freckles and beauty marks. That nose. The hair... Those eyes. Except, those eyes seemed much more brighter and lighter than the ones you knew to be reality.

Gulping, you slowly looked over and eyed Kylo, sound asleep, as you studied him. The same set of freckles and beauty marks. The strong nose and that dark, tousled hair. It had been him. But why had he been wearing what he wore? And why was it much like all those other dreams you had that were held within the night?

Had those been about him?

Impossible, they couldn't have been. What you felt in your heart now was never felt before... So why did it feel right? Why did it feel like a revelation?

"Moondust..." You muttered under your breath. "Starlight..." You thought back to the calligraphy set in your room, the paper you had found written on with that name... Had it been Kylo that had written it, or was it an outside force at play?

You tried not thinking too deeply into it, but that seemed impossible. It was all you could think about now that you were safe with Kylo and away from the torturous chair and Daniel's hold. There was something in your heart that wasn't there before. You cared for Kylo as he proved to have cared for you. You felt comfortable with him. You liked his company even more now... And you knew he was starting to feel the same for you. But, was it as friends... or was there more?

Your heart dipped at the thought. Sure, friends cared for one another, worried and looked out for them... But, did they sleep the way you were now sleeping with him? They did argue, that's for sure... But, how would you know? You never really had a friend before.

Feeling Kylo's grip tighten around you, bringing you even closer as your heart skipped a beat, you could feel his breathing against your neck as he found himself nuzzling against you, becoming more... comfortable with your presence. Even if he was the one who initiated sleeping closer.

Taking in a deep breath, knowing it was doing you no good over thinking, you eased back into him and shut your eyes. It wasn't best to dwell on what you didn't understand.

 

 

 

 

 **The** **scent** of something fresh, like flowers in spring, filled Kylo's senses as he felt his body slip back into consciousness. For a moment, he nearly had forgotten he fell asleep with you, the sight of your head so close to his and your body pressed to his made his heart flutter. His grip loosened around you, and as he was about to peel away, he realized he, too, had wrapped his leg around your own without knowing.

Unwrapping himself from you, feeling his cheeks heat up as the blood rushed to his head, Kylo took in a nervous breath before turning to lay on his back. His heart was racing and all he could feel was you against his body... and he was already missing the warmth shared between the two of you.

Hearing shifting, Kylo turned his head to see you rolling to face him, still asleep and unaware of your movements. For a moment, Kylo looked away, but when he felt you bury yourself into him as you pressed your folded arms into his side, his eyes widened. Did you subconsciously miss the warmth and search for it?

His ego wanted to push you away, but his heart wanted you to stay right there against him and go nowhere else. To be like that for the entire morning, into the afternoon, and even through the night. He liked the feeling of you there. He enjoyed your body being so close to his. And he... loved knowing it was you and no one else.

Shutting his eyes at the conflict of his own emotions and understanding them, Kylo rubbed his face with his left hand—the one that wasn't lost under the sheets and you. He had to do something, he needed to make a decision... but, what?

The dark cloud above him that controlled his life said to push you away, to scare you like all those times... even though he felt instant regret when he had. Even though you always came back. But, his heart and the faint light that you shined into it wanted to keep you. To have you. To make you his... and to be yours.

But that was a stretch and he knew he was too afraid. Even if all the signs were—and had been—there.

Looking down at you, eyeing the way your hair fell over and hid your face, Kylo carefully lifted his hand and pushed the strands to a side. Grouping them and pushing them over your shoulder, he felt his heart leap. It was like that time, not too long ago, when you had fallen asleep on the desk in his private study. Your soft complexity entrancing him, the way your skin looked so smooth... your eyelashes long and lips lightly pursed. He wanted to kiss you.

Gulping at the thought, his heart leapt as his thoughts then went back to when he had first kissed you. Out of impulse. He wished it had lasted longer... wished he hadn't ran away. Wished he hadn't wedged that gap between the two of you because he was embarrassed that you didn't like the kiss or that he had passed boundaries. Those days that he stayed away from you was filled with much self doubt and fear.

Kylo wasn't mad at you, he was mad at himself. What if that had pushed you away, what if that traumatized you, what if you hated him even more for that?

Of course, that was foolish now, seeing as you were right there beside him. Even if he had neglected you... Scared you away... Called you things he never meant. Hell, the moment they left his tongue he felt like a complete imbecile for even allowing himself to say it.

You weren't nothing, you weren't worthless or unnecessary, or whatever the hell nonsense he had spewed in his possessive anger. You were the total opposite of that. And he wasn't sure why he felt that so strongly for you when he had only known you for a short period of time...

Feeling you shift against him, a small yawn leaving your lips, Kylo sucked in a breath as your eyes fluttered open.

"Oh, sorry..." You mumbled, forcing yourself off of his warm, bare chest, to look away and prevent a blush from creeping on you. "I'm going to the washroom." You pointed, back facing Kylo as you stood up and nearly rushed off.

Watching you run off, Kylo's lips curved into a frown as his facial expressions dropped. For a moment he had hoped to see you smile up at him, greet him, and maybe... just maybe, suggest to sleep in. Yet, there you went, rushing to the washroom not even a minute after you had woken up.

"Kriff..." He grumbled, rubbing his face.

Feeling your heart race as you stood in the washroom, thinking about your dream of you and... Kylo? Young Kylo? Fantasy Kylo? You rubbed your face and internally screamed. You were afraid to even look him in the eye, knowing you'd see your dreams want to meld in with reality.

But, he looked so... different in the morning. So gentle and harmless. The way he lied there, calm and at ease, nothing tense about him, no glare or snarl, no deadly look in his eyes... Just a man who had woken up and probably wanted to go back to sleep. Oh, how that was making your heart race. A man as corse as Kylo Ren seeming so delicate at the early hours of the morning.

Spending easily an hour—or so it felt—in the washroom, freshening up, pondering, trying to find your center gravity before you went out to see Kylo again... you rubbed at your arms, realizing the lack of coverup you had and the lack of warmth. Exiting the room and expecting to see Kylo still in bed, you frowned. Where had a he gone? Shivering, you went to find a cloak to pull on and slip your feet into slippers.

Just before you were going to exit the bedroom, you found yourself studying it. A room much like any other, stagnant, almost as if unused... It didn't seem like the Supreme Leader's quarters, more like a guest room without the touch of Kylo Ren. Not one thing seemed to resemble him, everything seeming very... structured and set. Maybe that's why he had the study... Maybe he was hardly in his quarters to begin with.

Did he leave you there, alone? Was he already off to duties? Did he go to another room to ready himself? You had hoped not... even if you were doing better, you still weren't ready to be alone for too long. Especially in the palace. For all you knew, another trooper was out to get you.

Sucking in a breath, trying to clear your thoughts, you reminded yourself that you were safe. That if it wasn't for you leaving the palace itself, you wouldn't have been taken. You were fine, you were safe in Kylo's chambers. It was all going to be okay.

Hearing a door open and close, you jumped in your spot before quietly walking towards the door of the bedroom, just about to open it, it opened from the other end as your heart fluttered. Taking a step back and seeing Kylo standing there, you let out a sigh of relief. "I told you, you were safe here. Why are you worried?" He asked. Was it that obvious?

"I—" Sucking in a breath, you shook your head. "I'm not..." You lied, and it was apparent through your shaky, hushed tone.

Reaching his bare hand out, Kylo hesitated for a moment, deciding to caress the back of your head instead as you looked up at him. "Phasma and her men went to Kamino. No one will come for you. Believe me." He said confidently.

Nodding your head, you lowered your focus. You had noticed Kylo's gesture, how he wanted to touch you but hesitated. Was he scared? What was so irksome about skin to skin contact? After all... you did sleep against his bare chest, shouldn't that have counted? Apparently not, seeing as it wasn't his hand.

"Pack a bag for a week."

"Huh?" You asked, instantly looking up at him.

"I want you to pack a weeks worth of clothing. Preferably something you can breathe in." Kylo said as your eyebrows narrowed. "I have an idea in mind."

"Oh..." You nodded. "Are you sending me somewhere?"

Instantly shaking his head, Kylo sucked in his breath. "No. We are going somewhere."

Feeling your heart skip a beat in excitement, you smiled. "Okay." Turning away from him and aiming for the shared closet, finding a suitcase, you brought it out onto his bed before gathering a weeks worth of clothing. You hadn't realized it until then that Kylo wasn't dressed in his usual Supreme Leader attire. Rather, in black pants and a black tunic—the only colors he seemed to have worn. Maybe he had been packing and gathering things while you were in the washroom?

"Change into something you can wear on a desert planet." Kylo said as you finished packing, causing you to nod without a question, gathering a matching two piece outfit that was breathable, rushing into the washroom and entering the refresher to freshen up. Changing into your clothes the minute you dried up, you brushed your hair out before tying it back into a braid.

"Where are we going?" You asked Kylo as you joined his side, the man leading you out of the chambers the moment you had slid your shoes on. Trying to match his pace, long strides that were a bit too long for your own, you felt your veins fill with excitement. Kylo seemed as if he was in a rush, and if he had a place (or places seeing as it was a weeks worth) in mind, you knew there was something good to come.

"I have a few places in mind." Kylo said as he lead you towards the palace's hangar. "A few... planets." At the sound of that, your heart rate escalated.

"Planets?" You nearly gasped as Kylo nodded. "Where are we going to first?"

"Tatooine."

"Tatooine?" You questioned.

"We need the heat." Kylo said as the two of you entered the hangar. "And some alcohol."


	18. Cantina

" **Tatooine**?" You questioned. You were aware of a number of planets in the galaxy but only visited a few due to diplomatic missions... but, Tatooine has been mentioned once or twice by your parents. "Is that the desert planet?"

"Yes." Kylo said as the two of you came to a stop before an unmarked spacecraft. It didn't quite look like any of the registered First Order vessels, but it did look much like a shuttle... "We'll be visiting Mos Eisley briefly. Not the best place to be but no one will dare touch you there with me around."

Biting your inner lip, you sucked in a breath. "I can take care of myself, Kylo." Looking over at you, Kylo arched an eyebrow. "What? I was able to rid myself from two guards... which I killed... And then I thought I killed Daniel, too." You mumbled, but that didn't seem to phase Kylo. He had killed plenty and that was a given.

"You did it out of self defense." Kylo defended as you nodded. "But Mos Eisley is filled with lots of scum. I know you can defend yourself to an extent but you need to stay close to me and not upset anyone."

Nodding, you watched as Kylo hit the ramp-open button before the ramp lowered itself. "Then why are we visiting Tatooine?"

"Like I said before, we need some alcohol and the Cantina is one of the greatest... outside the Outlander Club in Coruscant." Gesturing for you to walk up the ram before him, you did so.

"Will... we be visiting Coruscant?" You nervously asked. Although you weren't against the idea—after what had happened—the thought was still a bit unsettling with the chances that someone could recognize you.

"Only if you wish to. I already have other planets in mind for us to visit." Kylo said as he followed you closely behind, coming to a stop at the top to lift the ramp.

"Maybe... some other time." You breathed as Kylo gave you small nod.

"Then it's best we leave to Tatooine now." Watching Kylo turn and walk towards the canopy of the ship, you stood there for a moment, wondering what had triggered him to want to go on a sudden trip. Maybe it was the fact that your wedding was...

"Our wedding is next week." You spoke up, breaking the small silence as Kylo stopped in his tracks, in the midst of working around the control panel. "Is that why you're doing this?" You curiously asked, fidgeting with your fingers. A part of you believed he did it for the fact that he wanted to get away with you—a delusional desire. But a bigger part of you knew he was doing it for the sake of the marriage, to get used to one another. And that made you unintentionally frown. You didn't want things to be forced upon, you wanted it to be natural.

"No." Kylo responded, speaking over his shoulder as he quietly gulped. It was as if he could sense your frown. "After what has happened, I think it's best we step away from the palace and the base as a whole."

"Oh..." You nodded, frown disappearing.

Then, Kylo turned just enough to face you. "I also believe that... I need to express myself better... towards you." He forced out. "The side... The sides of me that no one else sees because I am to be seen as ruthless and—"

"Something that you're not entirely..." You finished for him as Kylo nodded before he sucked in a breath.

"If we are to be wedded..."

"It's okay, Kylo. I understand." You nodded with a small smile, knowing very well it was difficult for him to express himself the way he was now. So used to keeping everything internalized and hidden. But, neither of you could have that; there was more to Kylo that was showing itself. The side that was desperate to be shown but he kept it within.

Joining him in the canopy, you took the co-pilots seat as Kylo then took the pilot's, you watching him as he maneuvered his way around the panel. Knowing he was taking a break as the Supreme Leader so suddenly was enough to prove how serious he was about... proving himself to you.

 

 

 

 

 **Walking** down the ramp of the spacecraft Kylo had taken both of you in, you lifted your hand like a visor to block the pair of suns from blinding you. Although it had already been the afternoon and the suns were slowly lowering, the heat and brightness the two exerted was enough to exhaust you.  Lucky for you, the two piece you had on was breathable.

The top portion was more of tube top, lacking sleeves, as the bottom portion was a skirt with a slit that was made out of a thin material that made it less hot for your legs. You were just glad you weren't wearing your typical gowns and cloaks like you did in the palace... It made you wonder how it was that Kylo wore all black to visit Tatooine.

"Don't get in anyone's way, stay closely behind me." Kylo said as he walked ahead, you following. 

Eyeing your surroundings in awe, amazed by the architecture that nearly matched the sandy terrain beneath it, you eyed the dome roofing and the arched entry ways. The close knit buildings and alleys that lead to even more maze-like areas. A part of you was curious and wanted to explore the area, but you knew better. It wasn't safe and nearly everyone you saw looked as if they'd sell you off for food portions or credits. So, you followed closely behind Kylo, on the occasion making sure you hadn't somehow wandered off while gazing at your surroundings.

Looking away for a moment and noticing there were stormtroopers scouting the area, you nearly picked up your pace and accidentally rammed into Kylo. "Sorry..."

Looking over at you, then the direction you were once walking in, Kylo gestured for you to walk ahead of him as he placed a hand on your back. "None of them are Daniel and they won't dare try following in his steps." He said to you as you gulped, heart slightly racing. "Come, lets get a drink."

Walking down the steps and aiming for the bar, your eyes widened at the environment you were in. All the creatures, scoundrels and smugglers. The villainous energy... No one was good news and you knew not to let your eyes linger too long on anyone. Yet, it was so hard not to look, you were so curious.

Watching the live band perform as you bobbed your head to the catchy beat, you felt a hand on your bare shoulder. Thinking it was Kylo, you turned, only to cringe at the sight of a towering creature you had never seen before. "What is a little lady like you doing in a place like this?" They hissed, although not sounding threatening.

"Enjoying the live music." You calmly spoke, only to suck in a breath and peel their hand off of you. "With my husband."

"Husband? I don't see a man anywhere near you?" They tilted their head, but you pointed over the creature's shoulder, towards the direction of the bar where Kylo stood.

And just as the creature looked over, you quickly slid away, rushing back to Kylo's side with a racing heart. "What did you do." Kylo spoke, tone not making his question sound like one.

"Nothing..." You lied, but Kylo turned to face you as he handed you a drink. "I went to look at the live band and... some creature came up to me."

"Princess." He spoke in a warning tone as you sighed.

"I said I was here with my husband." You shrugged, taking a sip from the drink and smiling, enjoying the taste and completely dismissing Kylo's blush. You didn't really ignore it, you were just so focused on the drink itself to pay it any mind. Either way, it was poorly lit in the Cantina.

Sucking in a breath and looking past you, Kylo spotted the creature you had mentioned, knowing it was them as they were looking directly at him. Squinting his eyes for a moment, the creature suddenly choked, coughing like crazy and turning away as Kylo smirked. "Come, let's sit down."

Looking up at Kylo, you nodded, following him towards a semi secluded booth as either of you sat across from one another. There was a silence between the two of you, although the area wasn't, both of you were. You kept your focus on the band while taking occasional sips of your fruity drink, happily swaying in your seat. Although you had run into plenty of trouble in under the span of two cycles... you liked to keep your mind busy. You couldn't dwell on your near death experiences or your unsettling run-ins. One thing your parents taught you was to always keep things lighthearted. There was no good in living a life dwelling on the past.

Nearly chugging his drink, missing the taste of it—and alcohol in general—Kylo cleared his throat. "My name isn't Kylo Ren."

Snapping out of your haze, you looked over at Kylo, seeing him hunched forward, forearms pressed against his knees as his cup hung loosely in his hold. "Hmm?"

"Kylo Ren, it isn't my birth name." Kylo confesses, eyeing the cup in his hand as you sat up straight. "It was given the moment I joined the First Order. A name that I will carry on forever."

Blinking, you took another sip and nodded. "How dark."

"What?"

"You said you'd carry it on forever. Sounds dark to me." You shrugged as Kylo blinked. He did not expect you to take it that way.

"Are you dismissing what I just said?" Kylo asked in confusion.

"Of course not!" You perked. "But, if your name is Kylo Ren now, then that is your name, is it not?"

Gulping, Kylo leaned back in his seat. "...It is."

"What's your birth name?" You asked as Kylo sucked in a breath, not realizing what he walked into when he had admitted the fact.

"It..." Clearing his throat, Kylo squeezed the cup in his grip. "Ben."

"Ben? Ben... Ren? Ben Ren?" You asked with a small smile. "Sounds catchy." You chuckled as you sipped your drink.

"That!" Looking up and seeing your smile, Kylo's heart leapt. "No... It's Ben Solo..." He mumbled as your eyebrows narrowed. The name sounded familiar. More familiar than it should have.

And Kylo noticed your reaction. "Yes... My father is—"

"I'm sorry, that name sounds familiar... Like, like a childhood friend forgotten or... Or someone I've met once." You shook your head. "I must be misreading my own thoughts." You waved a hand dismissively, but the feeling lingered.

Studying you, seeing the way your mood completely shifted, Kylo settled his cup down and ran his hand through his hair. He wouldn't expect you to know who Ben Solo was, only Kylo Ren. You must've confused his birth name with someone else's... Not many people knew of the name Ben Solo, it was nearly impossible that you had.

And the only ones who knew... Well, there was only a few, and only one he truly stayed in contact with.

"Are you ready to leave?" Kylo asked as you had aimlessly stared, deep in your thoughts, as if trying to remember the name.

Snapping out of it, you looked over at Kylo. "Is one drink too much?" You teased with a faint grin.

"There will be more where we're headed now. A much safer place, believe me." Kylo stated, standing from his spot as you then did the same, finishing your drink and settling it beside his. "I only came here for one worthy drink, the rest are garbage."

Lifting your eyebrows, you couldn't help but chuckle—a foreign sound but a sound Kylo grew to love.

Love?

Yes, he knew it was love. He loved that about you. And admitting to it made his heart flutter.

"Garbage, but there's a lot of customers." You pointed out as Kylo rolled his eyes. "The garbage will do."

"The garbage will do for one drink and one drink only." He huffed before walking away, aiming for an exit towards the back as you happily followed. If this was your first stop, you wondered what would be your next... and if it would be on Tatooine. Would you be staying the night there?

Exiting the Cantina and now seeing the suns had settled, the temperature dropping just a smidgen, you noticed Kylo was leading you back to the shuttle. "Where to now, captain?" You teased as Kylo felt his lips twitching into that of a very subtle smile.

"A little place called Cloud City."


	19. Calrissian

**An** orange-like planet came into your view as the vessel broke light-speed. Ahead of you, other, smaller spacecrafts, had been entering the atmosphere as well. They were oddly shaped, much like a pod racers hover craft, duo seating and almost as orange as the planet itself.

"I don't see any clouds..." You pointed out, furrowing your eyebrows as the vessel entered the planet. And just as you said it, you saw them. "Oh..."

"The planet only has a layer in the atmosphere suitable for humans, the Life Zone." Kylo explained as your eyes suddenly widened at the floating architecture. "That, is Cloud City. A gas mining colony floating in the sky."

"It's beautiful." You said in awe, amazed at that matter before you. "Aren't people a little scared it could... fall?" You then asked, looking over at him.

"It's completely safe, believe me." Kylo stated, approaching a landing dock as you eyed your surroundings. Yet another world you were fascinated in. Much different than your home and Starkiller II, and definitely far more different than Tatooine.

It was beautiful and you couldn't help but lean forward in your chair as you eyed the world before you. The shades of blues that took over the atmospheres, the off white building, the spacecrafts that flew by... You couldn't help but wonder as to why your parents never took you traveling when there was so much beauty in the galaxy outside of your home.

Realizing the ship had landed, you jumped out of your seat and rushed over to the ramp, not bothering to wait for Kylo as you hit the open button.

Watching you run off, Kylo shook his head with a subtle grin. He wasn't sure the last time he got excited over a planet... Possibly when he was a child and his parents told him he was going to Endor...

Aiming down the ramp, seeing you stand there and gaze at the city around you, Kylo walked ahead and came to a stop as a familiar face was approaching from the building before him. "Well look who finally showed up." The man smiled, arms wide open in presentation. "It's about time, I was wondering when you'd arrive!"

"We stopped at Tatooine first." Kylo responded, placing a hand on your mid-back as you snapped out of your haze, looking over to the older man before you.

"Tatooine?" He scrunched up his nose, only to shift his eyes. "Us?" Looking over at you, his smile grew back on his face, pearly white. "Look who it is. Long time no see, Y/N."

Blinking, your eyebrows narrowed. "I'm sorry, do I know you?" You asked in confusion. "I... I don't recognize you..." You frowned as Kylo had done the same.

"You know her?" Kylo asked as the man stood there in silence for a moment, only to clear his voice.

"I've heard of her!" He chuckled. "Long time no see as in... I know her parents."

"Oh..." You nodded. "Well, it's nice to meet you, mister..."

Reaching his hand out as you had done the same, the man smiled. "Calrissian. But you can call me Lando, please." He winked, taking your hand and kissing the back of it as you smiled back.

"Save the flirtation for another time." Kylo grumbled.

"What? It's in my nature to be attentive to my guests!" Lando exclaimed as Kylo rolled his eyes.

"I'm sure it is." At that, Kylo walked ahead, nearly pushing you with his hand as you joined him. "I'll take it from here. I know where to go."

Guiding you along the white halls with his hand still pressed against your lower back, you eyed your surroundings. It was so... white. Everything was bright and filled with light but you didn't mind, it was nicer than the darkness of the Cantina and definitely more comforting than that of Kamino...

Feeling Kylo's hand fall from your back as he approached a door that came to view towards the end of the hall you two entered, you slowed to a stop as you patiently waited. Kylo must've been fairly acquainted with Cloud City if he knew his way around and... had what seemed to be his own room.

"This is yours?" You pointed, breaking the silence.

"So it seems..." Kylo sighed as you shook your head at his response, the man looking over at you and sighing once again. "I meant—"

"I know what you mean." You nodded. "Supreme Leader of sarcasm."

Blinking, Kylo's eyes narrowed for a moment as you couldn't help but chuckle, looking down while covering your mouth. "You are a child."

"At least I have humor." You muttered, looking down at the floor.

Biting down, Kylo looked away and felt the corners of his lips curl upwards while the door opened before him. "Come on, princess of humor." Kylo spoke as you lifted your head, smiling at that before walking in.

Hearing the door shut behind you, your eyes wandered the room. Much like a living room with sofas and tables, another door that lead to (what you assumed to be) the bedroom. As you eyed the bright room that contrasted against Kylo so heavily, you yawned.

"We will have dinner and then you may rest." He spoke as you nodded, walking over to the large window across from you that presented Cloud City.

"Kylo... How do you know of this place?" You curiously asked.

Turning his head over to you, Kylo quietly swallowed. "I've been here before."

At his blatant response, you turned on your heel and eyed him. "If we are to be married, you should know better than to be so nonchalant with your responses when I am trying to know you better. Ben Solo."

Blinking at the slight hissing that undertook your tone, Kylo cleared his throat. "My... parents know Lando. He is a family friend. I visit when I can to... get away." He struggled as you nodded. "I've been here a few times as a child... This was my parents apartment."

Giving him a small smile, you walked over to him. "Thank you." You bowed your head. "Not everything has to be a secret. No matter how crucial it may be for your personal characterization and personality. You are human in the end. You feel, you have emotions. Attachments and desires. It's okay to speak every now and then rather than internalize."

Eyeing you, looking down and tightening his jaw, Kylo knew you were right. He just hated to admit it. "For a quiet princess, you speak a lot when it comes to my humanity."

"I am to marry you, am I not?" You arched an eyebrow before turning to look out the window once again. "I would like to understand my future husband better. Difficult or not. You are still human, as am I."

Watching you look back out the window, Kylo's stomach turned in ways he couldn't remember it ever doing. You were slowly breaking out of your cocoon just as he was...

Taking in a quiet breath, Kylo took a few steps forward, keeping his eyes on you before looking out the window. After all that happened, in the span of weeks, all that he had done to scare you away... to keep you from getting close, you still stood strong. Were you that persistent? Or were you that nice? Maybe you were doing it with the idea that you were doing it for your people on the back of your mind... Either way, the amount of attention that you still gave him made his heart race faster than it ever had. "Why..." Sucking in a breath, Kylo cleared his throat, causing you to look over.

"Yes?" You tilted your head, eyeing him as Kylo stood there, focus out the window but words struggling to slip his tongue.

"It's not important." He shook his head as you slowly nodded.

Looking down at your own hands, fiddling with your fingers, you bit your inner lip. You wanted to know what it took to tear down that invisible barrier to get to Kylo. What it took to get more out of him then dry responses and unfinished questions. He was an enigma and you wanted nothing more than to understand him no matter how difficult it was. He was defensive for a reason. Acted the way he did because he didn't like the idea of allowing someone in. "I'm sorry for—“

"Don't." Kylo instantly spoke up, knowing where you were going. "It... It wasn't your... It wasn't your fault."

Blinking, you looked up at Kylo. "But, I—“

"You wanted to leave. You wanted to get away because..." Gulping, Kylo bit down. "Because of me."

"It was impulsive, I—"

"No." Kylo shook his head as you sighed. "I... It was my fault." Feeling your eyes widen, you felt your lips part, only to close them. "If I hadn't... If I wasn't the way I was towards you, you wouldn't have felt such way and I—" Stopping himself, Kylo looked down, not realizing his fists were clenched until he loosened them.

"Kylo..." You softly spoke, turning to face him.

"I'm..." Turning his head to look down at you, he searched your face before looking you in the eyes. "I'm sorry." Looking away and just about to walk off, to leave your side, you caught his wrist and held him in his place.

Watching as Kylo turned his head back towards you, eyebrows faintly furrowed, struggling to stay stitched together, Kylo felt his heartbeat stutter by the way you looked at him. You said nothing, but your eyes said enough.

"I regret it." He spoke up. "The moment I yelled at you. The way I destroyed the painting and terrified you. I regretted it instantly the second I saw you run off." Feeling his breath hitch at the thought, he gulped. "I went looking for you... after I had destroyed the rest of the paintings in my study. I thought I had lost you.

"I saw those paintings you made and I knew I had made a mistake. I knew I was wrong. I always am. I never allow you to get close to me. I always stay silent and closed off because that is how I am. Yet... you always seemed so... happy whenever I did the smallest of things with you.

"So then I searched for you and as I did I had overheard a pair of stormtroopers speak about you and... him." Kylo snarled, the faint flame of jealousy and hate flickering within himself. "And then everything went to hell. The world around me was nonexistent and I panicked. I panicked to the point I hadn't even noticed I fainted until I woke up in the medical wing. That's when I knew I—"

Seeing the sudden shine in his eyes as he has begun speaking through tight teeth, your heart sank. "Kylo—"

Staring down at you as his lips trembled with how tight he had been clenching his jaw, Kylo hadn't realized how much the situation had truly affected him until now. He had been working on impulse. Not seeming to care that he had a panic attack that sent him down. Not realizing how much you had truly meant to him. Not knowing... and not accepting... how relieved he was to have you, right there before him.

Kylo's hand had reached around and pressed against the back of your head as he leaned forward and instantly pressed his face into your neck, free arm wrapping around your waste tightly as he brought you to him. Your lungs filled with air as your heart raced, you could feel your feet being forced to tiptoe as he held you tightly.

An embrace.

He was hugging you and you could feel him trembling against you, fistfuls of your hair being held within his grip as you stood there. You knew he felt guilty. It was obvious. But the guilt wouldn't have been there if he hadn't cared about you. And you knew he had, somewhere, deep inside.

Feeling the wetness on the skin of your neck, you gently pushed back to see tears coating Kylo's cheeks. The faint river leading to his jawline, apparent as his eyes pooled up. You were about to wipe them away but suddenly heard the main door open, causing you turn.

"Good evening, I am C-8P8, your personal droid for your stay. I have brought you your dinner and will set it up." The droid spoke, Kylo slipping away from you and rushing off into the bedroom as you quickly turned and watched him disappear. Your heart cracked at the sight, wanting to follow, but knowing better you shouldn't.

Wiping your neck and eyeing the tips of your fingers, you turned to face the droid as it had finished setting up the small dining table. "Thank you."

"Of course." It bowed. "If you need anything more, Mr. Ren will know how to contact me." At that, the droid walked away and left the room, leaving you in silence as you turned to eye the bedroom.

Kylo needed alone time and you respected that. After all, he had confessed more to you in under five minutes than he had to you in three weeks... or anyone (you supposed) in a lifetime. He was drained and overwhelmed. But you were thankful that he was slowly breaking out of his shell.

You just hoped this didn't mean he was going to shut you out once again after letting you in.


	20. Stay

**It had been**  over two hours since Kylo had locked himself within the bedroom. Over two hours since the food arrived and nearly an hour of you patiently waiting for him to emerge to join you for dinner and eat together. But, he never came, and you ate alone.

Returning his food within its containers, not wanting to leave them outside, you stood from the table and cleared it up before sitting at one of the couches. You sat there in silence, staring at nothing while begging for sleep to overcome you. But, you weren't exhausted, although mentally, you sure as hell were drained.

Two hours turned into four and you had decided you needed to walk around. Maybe that would physically tire you out. You truly did not want to disturb Kylo, you respected boundaries, and... well, sitting around for so long wasn't doing you justice.

At some point, C-8P8 had returned to deliver the suitcases and you had changed into something more simple. You knew you wouldn't have access to the bedroom for sometime so you changed in the open before deciding to go on your walk.

Exploring the halls and stopping at different points, admiring the architecture unique to Cloud City, you found yourself standing at a balcony, overlooking the city amongst the clouds. The air seemed much more clearer than that you were used to, although quite different. The way the clouds moved along the floating structure so gracefully caught your attention as you leaned into the balcony wall and watched them sway by.

Maybe this was why Kylo went there often. It was quite calming  barren, everyone minding their own business—although you were sure it was because it was now nighttime. But it was still less... stressful and hostile than Starkiller II.

"Hello, princess." Hearing a semi familiar voice speak from behind you, you turned. "Can't sleep?"

Sucking in a breath, you nodded. "I'm not tired." You admitted. "Although, I should be... I am not."

Nodding his head, Lando walked closer and stood beside you. "How are you liking your stay so far?"

"It's lovely!" You smiled at him, only to look down and suck in a breath. "It's wonderful..."

Eyeing you, Lando then looked out at the clouds. "Ben... Kylo, whatever he calls himself, is a very complex man. Wouldn't you agree?"

Instantly looking up and seeing Lando keep his focus away, you nodded. "He is."

"I think... that's what makes him very interesting. Unique, in a sense. Difficult to understand and get to, but that's the beauty of him." Lando said. "He's a very three dimensional man even if he seems very two dimensional. But that's because he forces himself to seem that way. He's just hard to get to. Hard to understand. But there's so much about him, within himself, that wishes to be expressed. After all, a man like himself must have much to tell."

Breathing in, you turned and held onto the balcony once again, mentally agreeing with Lando.

"I know very well he tried pushing you away. It's a given, he has that stubborn mentality that he thinks sheltering himself will help save him from making matters worse. Believing that he couldn't possibly gain something good without tarnishing it... but, you, my dear princess... You are something else. You, without realizing it, have wedged yourself deep in that man. Why else would he take you to his secret hideaway?"

Lifting your eyebrows, you shifted your eyes over to Lando slowly. "What?"

Snickering, Lando shook his head before looking over at you. "You don't think that man travels often, do you? He doesn't even dare go on vacations. The only time he travels is for the First Order." He explained. "He has, not once, brought someone else with him here. Never. You must be held highly by him without knowing it."

Feeling a small smile grow on your lips, you sighed. "I must be lucky." You teased.

" _He_  must be lucky. He doesn't truly know what he has, even if it is an arranged marriage." Lando smiled. "You two don't know just how compatible you truly are for one another."

Blinking in bewilderment at his statement, watching Lando straighten his back before walking towards the doors, you felt your heart flutter. Compatible? You and Kylo? How would he know?

"Goodnight, princess. Sleep well." At that, Lando left your sight as you watched the door shut. Did Kylo think the same? Did he think the two of you were compatible? You couldn't even decide yourself, your mind was a whirlpool of thoughts and not one thing even made sense.

Feeling a yawn coming on, you covered your mouth before deciding it was time to return back to the room. Maybe Kylo would've decided to eat and was now resting... If not, then you'd take the couch. You truly did not want to bother him.   
  


 

 

 **Time**  melted together after staying locked up in the washroom for so long. Kylo, at first, decided to wash his face, but with the heaviness in his heart, he couldn't help but sit on the floor and divulge into his own thoughts. His thoughts about you. It took plenty of energy out of him to say what he had, to confess, and it almost felt as if he had said those three words he was afraid to feel.

After what would've been two hours had passed, and with a numbing bottom, he decided to undress and enter the refresher... another two hours being lost in there. Kylo was completely lost and couldn't seem to find a way out of his thoughts. It was its own world and you were the center its gravitated.

He meant every word he had said, because it was the truth. And knowing that the idea of losing you caused him to panic so severely had his mind in a haze. You had such a strong affect on him and you didn't know. He didn't even know until hours before. Until he realized how much you had meant to him when the remembrance of how he felt triggered the epiphany.

That was when he realized what it was. After nearly six hours of locking himself away from you, after allowing himself to be sucked into his own thoughts, he knew what he was feeling. What he had been struggling to understand. And it nearly seemed impossible.

Emerging from the washroom with nothing but a towel on, Kylo exited the bedroom, only to find you laying on the sofa. You were fast asleep, curled up into a ball, using your own dress as a blanket to cover your legs and feet. Staring at you, feeling his chest cave in, Kylo then saw the luggage's sitting in the corner, yours opened. He hadn't realized you had changed until then, then concluding that you must've changed right there in the living area... in front of a large window.

Feeling his face heat up, Kylo rubbed his eyes, as if that would rid the thought. He hated how jealous he got, especially over something as small as that. It wasn't like there was someone else in the room to see you.

He was much too into his feelings.

Walking over to you and carefully lifting you in his arms, he brought you to the bedroom, used the Force to remove the sheets, and lied you down. Watching you curl up once again as he placed the quilt back, Kylo was eager to touch your skin, to kiss you goodnight... Instead, he turned and went to grab the luggage's before getting a change of clothes.   
  
  
  


**Morning**  had come and you woke up in confusion. You weren't on the couch any longer, rather, the bed. Stretching as you turned onto your back, your eyes landed on Kylo's own bare back as he had been asleep beside you. The idea of him sharing a bed with you—and him more than likely bringing you there—made you smile. You just hoped he was okay.

Carefully and quietly sitting up from the bed, your eyes landed on the luggage in the corner of the room, then they went to Kylo. You wondered how long he had been locked up. Wondered how long you had been sleeping before he found you. To your disappointment, you had found the food still in its place, waiting to be devoured by Kylo, and as you went to lie down, you didn't expect yourself to sleep so easily... Not when you were unaware of Kylo's well being. And definitely not when Lando's words lingered.

Your heart throbbed at the thought. You wondered what Kylo truly felt for you if he was that concerned and that terrified to cause him to faint from panic. For now, the thought lingered, maybe someday your question would be answered... but you knew at this moment it was going to take some time to get back in if Kylo had chosen to kick you out once again.

Just about ready to stand up and aim for the washroom, you felt a hand clutch onto your nightgown followed by a faint " _stay_."

Feeling your heart skip a beat, you looked down at the hand, then followed where it had come from, now seeing Kylo resting on his stomach with one eye opened as the other was shield by his pillow. Your insides twisted as your heart lodged up your throat by the sight. Kylo, half asleep, begging for you stay there. Maybe he wasn't aware that he was awake? Maybe this was something odd he did in his sleep? But when you felt him gently tug at your gown, you slowly nodded and joined him back under the sheets.

You wondered what the time was, light had already been peeking through the clouds and you could see them faintly through the dim windows. Maybe it was much too early, either way, it wasn't like you had a reason to be up.

Resting on your side and facing him, Kylo eyed you in silence, hand still clutched on your gown—almost as if he were afraid you'd disappear. It was a good thing he had found you on the couch rather than an empty room, you could only imagine his reaction then.

"I waited for you last night." You nearly whispered as Kylo quietly lied there and eyed you. "I thought we would have dinner together... But I expected you needed alone time."

Sucking in a deep breath, Kylo's grip on your dress loosened before he looked away. "Forgive me."

Furrowing your eyebrows, you shook your head. "I'm not upset." You said, causing Kylo to look back at you. "I was... concerned. You never ate."

Blinking, Kylo gulped before letting go of you, turning on to his back before sitting up. "I will retrieve the droid for breakfast and we... we can makeup for last night."

Sitting up, you moved closer to him and sat beside him on the edge of the bed. "You don't have to force yourself to be something you're not, Kylo. As much as I love this side of you, as much as it makes me happy, I don't want you—"

"I  _want_  to do this." He interjected. "I want to be this way. I want you to... not be afraid of me anymore."

"Kylo, I was never—"

"You were.  _You were_." Kylo breathed.

"I was upset because I was forced into something I did not want. I was hurt that my family would send me off so easily. But I was immature. I realized that there was more to it. More to  _you_. You hide yourself within all this anger and rage, you act as if you have no reason to be expressive, but you do. You have every reason to be. You are human and you have a heart and a soul. And you have me." You said. "You have me, Kylo. You do and you know this because even before I stupidly tried running away, you tried your best to be kind."

Sucking in a breath as he sat there, feeling his chest tighten as his cheeks reddened, Kylo suddenly felt your arms wrap over his shoulders as you embraced him from the side while sitting on your knees. "Thank you, princess."

Smiling, you left a small kiss against his hair before standing up and tugging on his wrist. "Let's get food in you, I know you're starving." Watching as you turned away and guided him, Kylo felt his cheeks burn up once again at the feeling of your gentle kiss against his head.

He knew he didn't deserve this, he knew he didn't deserve  _you_. But, he thanked the Force. He thanked the stars and the universe for bringing you two together, for he was sure he needed to feel what he felt for you.


	21. Treehouse

**"I wish** my parents travelled more when I was a little girl..." You spoke up as you walked alongside Kylo, the two of you aimlessly strolling along the halls. "I knew the galaxy was vast... but I never knew it was so beautiful. Even if it were ugly, like Tatooine kind of was, I still find it beautiful."

Feeling a smile grow on his lips, Kylo eyed you for a moment before looking up ahead where either of you approached the doors of a balcony. "Then I have found my purpose in being your husband." He teased as you couldn't help but chuckle, gently tapping his stomach as either of you came to a stop.

"You would drop your duties as Supreme Leader to fulfill your wife's goal in traveling the galaxy?" You jokingly asked as you crossed your arms over the balcony.

"If it gives me a reason to get away from my duties more often, then, yes. My wife comes first." Kylo nodded as you couldn't help but smile, looking over at him and eyeing the way his eyes light up in the afternoon sun. "Also, I can just lie and say I have important meetings to attend off base."

Rolling your eyes, you grinned. "Sly." You shook your head, looking away from him. "I truly wonder how my parents are doing... If they worry about me. If they care at all." Turning his head to look at you, Kylo sucked in a small breath. "I miss Calidum. At least... the atmosphere of it. But, traveling like we are now, seeing the galaxy, I miss it less and less."

"I'm sure once we return to Starkiller II, you will miss it once again." Kylo said, but you shook your head.

"The palace is my home now. Although it may not have the beaches I adore, it has snow, and snow is quite lovely." You spoke lightheartedly as Kylo slowly nodded.

"Maybe... one day, you and I can visit those... lovely beaches of yours." He suggested, causing you to smile, leaning your head against his arm.

"I would love that."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 **Your** eyes danced around the vast amount of life calmly sitting around you, lost in their own quiet conversations with small smiles. It was a much nicer sight to see and a much better atmosphere than that of Tatooine's cantina.

Paradise Cantina felt just like that, a paradise, with couches spread throughout and tables to sit at, there were windows all around to bring in natural lighting as well as offer a view of the outside city. It was relaxing, you were glad Kylo has brought you there and you couldn't help but wonder if he visited the Paradise Atrium often whenever he traveled to Bespin.

Kylo has told you the story of the minor history the lounge had in its past, but as decades past, it grew more and more open to guests and became a simple lounge than a meeting place.

"I have a place in mind for us to visit." Kylo spoke up as he lowered his glass from his lips, leaning back on the corner of the shared sofa with one arm draped over the back. "We could leave tonight or in the morning, whichever you prefer."

Taking a sip from your drink, you lowered it before looking over at him. "Where?" You asked, adjusting your legs from lying on the sofa's cushion rather than before you like Kylo had been sitting.

"A forest moon." He began. "In the Outer Rim. Humans don't live there, it was more of a base during the time of the Empire. It's nothing but forest and mountains... It's something different than what we have seen." Kylo explained as you eyed him in awe, already captivated. "I traveled there much as a kid. It's quite beautiful."

"I will take your word for it." You nodded with a smile, finishing your drink before standing up. "Why don't we go now?"

"Now?" Kylo questioned as you nodded.

"Yes!" You chuckled. "It's spontaneous. I've never done anything spontaneous and this trip was quite spontaneous."

"Right..." Kylo looked at you with narrowed eyes. "Spontaneous."

"A whole planet practically to ourselves. It's exciting! We've been to populated areas. A sandy planet and a city in the clouds! Why not a forest?" You smiled as Kylo sighed.

"I suppose we can leave now, I haven't been there in quite some time but I haven't forgotten my way around." Kylo said as you couldn't help but jump in excitement. A forest moon sounded beautiful and... well, anything at this point sounded beautiful, you wanted nothing more than to get away. To travel. To get that side out of Kylo more. And, so far, it was working.

Grabbing his gloved hand and pulling him to his feet, you led the two of you back to the shared space, eager to leave already.

Packing didn't take all that long, seeing as the two of you had only been there for one night. The moment you had closed the bags and settled them to a side, Kylo requested for a droid to bring them back to his ship before he led you back to the landing dock.

"Leaving already?" Lando spoke up, standing in the distance as he eyed the two of you. "Kinda heart broken, was getting to know the lovely young lady." He winked as you couldn't help but chuckle.

"We have other destinations to get to." Kylo spoke as you nodded, smiling at Lando.

"Oh, that sounds lovely. You better take your little lady to Naboo—"

"Lando." Kylo spoke in a warning tone.

"What? It's a beautiful planet, princess." Lando said to you as you lifted your eyebrows. "Believe me! Beautiful landscapes, bodies of water, the architecture is magnificent—"

"We are going to Endor." Kylo interjected.

"Endor?" Lando narrowed his eyebrows, confused and nearly disgusted. "Why Endor? It's a dead moon and there's nothing but debris and Ewoks."

"It's a lovely planet." Kylo defended. "If you look past the disintegrating bases and deteriorating AT-AT's..." He grumbled, but you still kept smiling, still eager to see it. "And... there is... water..."

"Water." Lando nodded, narrowing his eyes.

"Yes, water. Water and lots of trees and— IT IS NICE." Kylo snapped before turning on his heel, walking up the ramp of his ship.

Turning your focus away from a stomping Kylo, you looked over at Lando. "Thank you for your hospitality. I truly hope I will come again soon!" You waved.

"Of course, this is your home as much as it is Ben's." Lando nodded as you nodded back, turning to join Kylo. "Don't forget what I said, princess." Looking over your shoulder, you sucked in a breath. "Compatibility."

Keeping quiet, you turned your focus back ahead and kept walking up the ramp, towards the canopy and settling beside Kylo. "I'm still excited to see Endor." You softly smiled. "No matter what Lando says."

Looking over at you, Kylo sucked in a small breath. "I promise... it's more than just... water and trees."

"I believe you." You nodded. "Wherever it is, whatever it has, I'm still very thankful for you taking me there."

Gulping as he eyed you, Kylo then looked away. "You're too nice..." He grumbled, but you shook your head.

"There is no such thing as too nice, it's only having a big heart." You defended as Kylo bit his lip, preparing for lift off and jumping to light speed.

 

 

 

 

 **"Here** **we are..."** Kylo spoke as the ramp of the ship lowered, the two of you standing before it as your eyes landed on the vast trees. "I promise, there's more than just—"

"Its beautiful." You smiled. "It's like... a forest planet..."

Looking over at you, Kylo slowly nodded. "Well, it is called the forest moon..."

Waving a dismissive hand, you walked down the ramp and eyed the surrounding nature, only to spot a deteriorating AT-AT. Tilting your head, you pointed. "That is—"

"Why don't we go find what I came here for." Kylo quickly said as he got a hold of your shoulders, turning you around and walking you away from the area.

"What you came here for? I thought you came here to show me Endor?" You asked looking over your shoulder at him.

"I did." Kylo simply said. "But... there is other things I cam here for." He nodded while guiding you along, you continuously gazing at your surroundings. Every so many yards, you spotted some sort of scrap metal that, whenever you were about to point it out, Kylo would turn you away and show you a tree or a bush. Feeling kylo slow his pace, you looked up at him. "Here we are." He breathed as you shifted your focus from him, up to the treehouse he was looking at.

"A treehouse?"

"Yes... It's, uh..." Scratching the back of his neck, Kylo cleared his throat. "It's my parents and I treehouse... From years ago." He said as you smiled.

"Do you think we can go up to it?" You asked, turning to face Kylo.

Looking at the ladder, squinting his eyes, Kylo took in a deep breath. "I hope so."

"I can go up first and you catch me?" You joked, winking up at him as Kylo furrowed his eyebrows. "Unless... you want to go up first and land on the ground because I don't think I'll be able to catch you." You shrugged as Kylo furrowed his eyebrows. "It's your choice, Supreme Leader."

Looking at the ladder, then back to you, Kylo sighed. "No, I will go up and if I fall... I fall..."

Holding back a smile, you nodded. "Be careful." You said, waving a hand as Kylo took in a deep breath, walking over and carefully tugging on the ladder. Watching him, Kylo took one step at a time, carefully climbing up higher and higher as he muttered something under his breath. "Is everything alright?" You asked as Kylo quietly nodded, making his way to the top and checking the surrounding of the treehouse.

"It's good, you can come up." Kylo said, hearing the wood boards of the pathway faintly creak before entering the treehouse itself. He expected to see moss and vines growing around, webs taking over as well, but everything looked fine... almost as if someone had been living in it. Furrowing his eyebrows and spotting the small bed that was once his, then checking behind the curtain to his parents bed, Kylo sucked in a breath. "Princess!" Kylo called out,studying the treehouse, seeing old toys that were once his amongst a few books and drawings. "Princess?"

Huffing, clenching his fists, Kylo walked out of the treehouse, seeing you nowhere in sight. Furrowing his eyebrows, he walked over to where the ladder was, he was just about to call out again, only to look down and see you surrounded by... Ewoks. "Kylo..." You slowly spoke, eyeing all the fuzzy creatures surrounding you with spears. "You didn't mention there was going to be furious... teddy bears.

"Kriff..." He cursed under his breath. "Don't do anything that will upset them."

"I am not doing anything..."

"Don't move."

"I am not moving..." You said with your hands lifted up in defense.

Climbing down the ladder, Kylo suddenly caught the attention of the Ewoks, the horde of them instantly turning around, only to gasp. The crowd of Ewoks all spoke at once, saying something you couldn't understand as Kylo lifted his hands. Seeing them all stand still and hush up, your eyes widened.

"You... Do they know you?" You asked as Kylo took in a deep breath.

"You could say that..."


	22. Ewoks

**A wave** of praises came from the Ewoks before you as Kylo stood there with tinted cheeks. He wasn't sure what to do, wasn't sure how to get himself out of the horde. It had been too long since he was last on Endor and he didn't expect the Ewoks to remember him... now that he was no longer their height...

"Kylo? What's going on?" You asked, watching as two Ewoks walked up to him and grabbed either of his hands, causing him to hunch over the slightest. "Kylo?"

"I... Uh..." Unsure of how to explain the situation, Kylo's cheeks turned a deeper shade of red.

"Kylo... where are they taking you?" You nervously asked, only for another pair to walk over to grab your hands and pull you along. "Where are they taking us?"

"Yubnub! Yubnub!" They all chanted, tugging you and Kylo away from the treehouse.

"When I was a... child... I played with the Ewoks a lot and they... respected me—"

"What?" You grew wide eyed. "You and Ewoks? You and teddy bear looking creatures were... friends?" You asked.

"YES, OKAY!" He shouted defensively. "NOTHING WRONG WITH—"

"Kylo..." You sighed.

"...Sorry..." He grumbled. Following along as the Ewoks continued on to cheer, the two of you soon found yourselves in a community of treehouses. Each were connected by wooden bridges that lead to one another, Kylo was forced to sit on a chair as the Ewoks conversed with him, his Ewokese being rusty as he tried his best to respond to them.

Watching with a smile, thankful that the Ewoks were enjoying your company rather than eating you, you got lost in a gaze, only to be interrupted as one had tugged on you. "Oh, hello!" You greeted with a smile as the fuzzy creature extended its small arms out. "Is that for me?" You asked, seeing something folded up as the Ewok nodded, then gesturing for you to follow. Looking at Kylo once more, you then followed the Ewok into one of the huts.

Taking the clothes in your own hands, the Ewok left you after it shut the door behind. Unfolding whatever it was they made, you eyed it. It was a soft brown color, the front being tied together as the sleeves were short. From the waist down, tendrils of the fabric hung with high slits, but not high enough to show too much. Changing into it, not wanting to upset the Ewoks by not wearing their gift, you sucked in a breath and eyed the dress on you. It was quite comfortable and fit just right, amazed that it had when you were sure they couldn't have possibly made it so suddenly.

Exiting the hut, your eyes suddenly landed on Kylo, who was now standing and... in a different outfit? He no longer had his black on black attire, rather, something in a similar color like your own. Tilting your head, you took a few steps forward, seeing he was in what seemed to be a poncho and... shorts. "Lovely outfit you have on." You teased, Kylo's head snapping over, you not realizing his hair was partially tied back.

"The Ewoks made me do it." He defended, but you couldn't help but chuckle. Suddenly, a wave of cheering and praising came your way, you looking around and seeing the happy Ewoks approach you. "I see they made you change, too." Kylo huffed.

"Yes, but my dress is cute." You chuckled, but your focus was set on the horde of Ewoks to even notice Kylo's offended expression.

"My outfit is... decent!" He exclaimed. "I just— They made me do it!"

Laughing, you felt the Ewoks grab your hands and pull you over to a seat. "Relax, Kylo, your legs look nice." You smiled, looking over at him as he pursed his lips, blushing at your compliment. Taking a seat, an Ewok climbed a small ladder as another did the same, the two tending to your hair and doing something for it as Kylo watched with a throbbing heart. You hadn't seemed this happy in... well, he couldn't quite recall. Yes, you were happy on Bespin and partially on Tatooine, but now you were glowing.

Staring at you in awe, Kylo hadn't realized the Ewoks had departed, leaving him alone as the rest went to you. They all seemed to have liked you, somehow so easily. You had hardly said a word, but your aura was enough; and with that bright grin, Kylo knew you had won the fur balls over.

Finishing your hair, intertwining strings with your braid, they chattered on and pulled you to your feet, guiding you once again as Kylo followed shortly behind. A meal had been made, a pair of seats put together at a small table had been waiting for both you and Kylo as the Ewoks wanted to celebrate his return.

Taking the seats, the two of you sat beside one another as the Ewoks began to dance around, chanting and singing happily as you watched with a smile. You weren't entirely sure what was happening, but you knew it was good. "What are they doing?" You asked, eyes focused on the creatures.

"They're celebrating my visit..." Kylo began. "They also think you and I are married..." He cleared his throat as you smiled.

"Well, they aren't entirely wrong, we will be very soon." You nodded, looking over at him. "At least they're not eating me."

Lightly smiling at your joke, Kylo sucked in a small breath, eyeing you much too long for his own comfort. But, he couldn't help it, you were enticing and he had every right to believe so. The thought of being away from the Order and being around you—and _just_ you—helped him open up more than he ever believed he would.

"How are you liking Endor so far?" Kylo finally broke the silence.

"It's lovely." You nodded. "The Ewoks made it even better." You truthfully spoke, smiling at him.

Nodding his own head, Kylo looked away, over to the small feast as you had done the same, flustered and wishing the ever-growing tension between the two of you would be satisfied.   
  
  


**Hours** had passed and the Ewoks had kept you entertained, you ate and danced with them as they had pulled you with them. Kylo had stayed seated majority of the time, watching you have fun. You deserved it, you needed it, after all that has happened... it was the least he could give you.

Enjoying yourself as you danced around, you only looked over at Kylo and sucked in a breath, walking over and sticking out a hand. "Come."

"No... I'm—"

" _Kylo_. Come." You demanded, stepping closer as your hand was waiting for him to take it.

Sighing, Kylo was just about to take your hand, but a pair of Ewoks rushed over and pulled him away as another set did the same with you. They danced in circles and sang along around the two of you, moving around and enjoying the gathering. You couldn't help but laugh and cheer them on as Kylo stood there and watched, unsure of what to do.

More time had passed and the Ewoks had become too immersed into their own activities to even bother stopping Kylo from slipping away. Looking over and seeing him disappear, you carefully made your way out of the crowd and followed him after. Watching him descend, further away from the celebration, along the bridges, he slowed his pace as he came to a stop and leaned his hands into the rope railings.

Quietly approaching him, you kept your distance far enough to not interrupt him. He looked deep in thought, staring out into the sky as the sun had been setting. The warm glow reflected on either of you, Kylo looked golden, almost like an angel in the resting sun. You smiled at the sight, never seeing Kylo in such natural lighting before. He looked beautiful.

"You may join me if you'd like." He spoke up, catching you off guard as you were in a trance. "Your presence is welcomed."

Smiling after snapping out of your haze, you quietly walked over and stood beside him. "It's beautiful." You said, eyeing the sunset. "Did you do this as a kid?"

"I did a lot out here." Kylo softly spoke, taking in quiet breaths. "Aside from befriending Ewoks..."

Chuckling, you gently nudged him. "Nothing wrong with that, they sure know how to party."

"They do..." He nodded in agreement. "I liked exploring the forest and its caves. Taking swims after diving off of cliffs when I shouldn't have. I played in the streams, tried climbing trees... Force knows I had too much energy in me as a child."

Admiring the way he spoke of his childhood, much more captivated in him than the setting sun, your smile grew. "Would you like to experience it again?"

"What?" He asked, looking over at you. "Being a child?"

"Exploring Endor. Swimming and climbing... All of it." You tilted your head as Kylo eyed you, searching your eyes. "I would love to if you'd let me."

Sucking in a deep breath, feeling his heart flutter, he slowly nodded. "Of course..."

Grinning, you turned your focus back to the sunset as you breathed in. "Maybe tomorrow we can wander around and go for a swim." You suggested. "Of course... in a more relaxing manner. The swimming I did back on Kamino was rather draining." Rolling your shoulders, Kylo smiled.

"We wouldn't have to swim for our lives." He said. "Just for fun."

"Just for fun?" You gasped, looking over at him. "Did I hear you right?" You laughed as Kylo squinted his eyes.

"Leave me be." He grumbled, but you shook your head, wrapping an arm around his waist and leaning your head on his shoulder.

"I can't wait for us to have fun."  
  
  
  


 **Night** had fallen and you decided to return to the Ewoks. They were still partying on but you were falling exhausted. Kylo had suggested the two of you return to the treehouse that was once his, but the Ewoks thought differently... At least, about you.

"What do you mean she stays?!" Kylo exclaimed, looking down at the head Ewok. "She's— She's here with me! She's my... wife! We sleep together!" He shouted, shaking his head before having to try and translate his words into ewokese for them to understand. But they didn't like it one bit. "What about me?!"

"Kylo..." You softly spoke, walking over. "For this one night, I'll stay with them." You nodded.

"The treehouse isn't as close as you think, princess." He said, chest heaving. "I want you close so I can make sure you're okay."

Smiling at the gesture, you sucked in a breath. "I'm sure I'll be safe here... They've all got their weapons..." You said as Kylo groaned. "One night... Maybe I can find my way over to you once they've all fallen asleep."

"That's dangerous, other creatures could get you." Kylo shook his head.

"Then, I suppose you will have to come to me." You shrugged, letting the Ewoks pull you away and guide you to your designated hut as Kylo stood there, eyes round and skipping a beat. Was that a subtle demand? Or were you just tossing out an idea? He couldn't help but hope for the former... "Goodnight, Kylo." You said before disappearing into a hut as he took in a deep breath.

Turning around and leaving the area, making his way back to his treehouse, Kylo found himself with a loud mind. Should he go back to you later on? Sneak into your hut? Possibly take you to his treehouse?

Or would he stay? Not want to wake you but rather... join you.

Cursing under his breath, upset in the fact that the Ewoks had completely dismissed him and only focused on you, he climbed the ladder and made his way up to his treehouse. Peeling off the poncho and leaving himself in just his shorts, he tossed it beside his now discarded clothing and lightsaber. Sitting on his parents old bed, he huffed. He wanted you there, beside him like he had those past few nights. He slept better with you around and not just by having you nearby.

That's when he decided: he was going to go to you. He just had to wait an hour for the Ewoks to fall asleep.


	23. Dive

**Quietly**  making his way up to the community of Ewoks, Kylo eyed his surroundings and spotted all the sprawled out, resting natives of the planet. He had waited a little over an hour, perking out his treehouse every now and then to hear the chaos die down. The moment it had, and the moment he noticed some of the fires went out, he made his way down and over to you.

Eyeing the hut the Ewoks claimed to be your own, Kylo carefully walked over, not wanting to wake up a single creature and get caught. Reaching for the small door and having to hunch forward, he slowly closed it behind him before turning to see you lying on the small cot; were you asleep already?

Shifting in your spot, rolling on to your opposite side, your eyes fluttered open to see Kylo standing there. "Hi..." You whispered, stifling a laugh as Kylo took in a deep breath.

"We must go now."

"Go?" You arched an eyebrow. "Why not stay?" Sitting up an looking at him, Kylo sighed.

"The bed is much too small." He pointed.

"We can make it work." You nodded. "I can sleep on you..." You said, looking down at the bed before standing up as Kylo's heart skipped a beat. "Or you can sleep on the floor." Looking up at him, you teased.

Growing wide eyed, Kylo shook his head before walking to you, "I am not sleeping on that wretched floor." Gently pushing you to a side, Kylo lied down, feet just dangling off the bed as you couldn't help but chuckle, covering your mouth. "Don't laugh.  _You_  wanted to stay." He huffed before waving for you to join him.

"If I have to stay another night then I'll try to sneak over to you." You said, walking over and climbing on top of him.

" _Hmph_."

Feeling the rumble in his bare chest, you smiled, nestling yourself on him and nuzzling his neck. He was warm and it made you more comfortable than you now were. You could hardly sleep before, tossing and turning from the lack of warmth... and lack of Kylo. But now? Now it only took you mere seconds to knock right out and drift into deep sleep as Kylo wrapped his arms around you. You were like a teddy bear to him and he was your safe blanket.

Staring up at the ceiling, Kylo's thumb subconsciously began to rub circles against your back as he lied there, quietly. Excitement carefully filled his veins at the thought of spending the day with you exploring Endor.

He felt like a child, all those years ago when he was told he was going to visit Endor. It always kept him up that night before, wanting nothing more than to run around the forest moon then stuck at home in the city. There was something about Endor that he enjoyed and he was starting to believe it was the disassociation from civilization. And now that he was there with you? Kylo only hoped you'd see a far better side of him.

Being the Supreme Leader, it wasn't wise to suddenly abandon all work and disappear without a word. He knew his role was much to large amongst the First Order... but stepping away was necessary, especially for you. Kylo wanted you to enjoy your life, to not be so cooped up in the palace. Sure, that was going to be your life when you were officially married to Kylo, but, by then, you would have a higher roll.

And, by then... he had hoped he would be more open to you. After all, he hardly trusted anyone, but being there with you, comfortable in your presence the way the two of you were... he knew there was trust there. There must've been. If you hadn't, you wouldn't have let him so close to you. And, if he hadn't, he wouldn't have taken you to Bespin... let alone, shown you his study.

Kylo wanted to break away from his hostility that was brought upon him with his title and position within the First Order. He wanted to be open, to no longer be distant or held back.

But, as always, he was afraid. And he no longer wanted to be.

Bringing his hand into your hair, gently combing through it, Kylo leaned his head back enough to kiss your forehead before quietly muttering to your sleeping figure. "I regret all that I have done to push you away..." He breathed. "But I am afraid of what I feel for you."  
  
  
  


**_"I'm afraid."_ **

_"Of what, moondust?"_

_"Of what I feel for you..."_

_"What do you feel for me?"_

_"Something I had never felt so strongly for anyone else."_

_"Oh, don't say that!"_

_"But, it's true. I've never felt so much love in my heart for someone like I do_ _for_ _you, starlight."_

Waking up with a frown at the "voices" in your head that had no distinct voice attached to them, your eyes opened to see Kylo's bare chest. Just about to pull away, you realized his leg was entangled with one of your own as his arm dangled over your hip. The two of you must've shifted in your sleep. Gently smiling, you carefully peeled yourself from him, quietly sitting up and eyeing his long frame. He hardly fit the bed. A man as massive as him on a cot as tiny as the one he had been laying in made you stifle a laugh. It was cute, you just hoped he was sleeping well (like you had).

Reaching around for you, Kylo's heart skipped a beat as he instantly sat up, only to see you sitting there with a gentle smile on your lips. "Good morning, did you panic?"

Sucking in a breath, Kylo rubbed at his eyes. "...Possibly."

"How did you sleep?" You asked as Kylo ran his hand through his hair.

"Fine..." He muttered, looking at you as your eyebrow arched. " _Better_  with you than alone."

Smiling once again, you nodded. "Likewise."

Turning to sit on the edge of his bed, stretching out his limbs, you found yourself eyeing his back. His broad shoulders and outlined muscles, the thickness of him. You wanted nothing more than to wrap your arms around him and rest your cheek on his shoulder, but you feared scaring him away. Instead, you crawled over and placed a gentle hand on his smooth skin before leaning over to look at him. "Are you excited for our day on Endor?"

Shivering at your touch once he registered it was just that, he looked over and nodded. "Of course."

"Good." You patted his shoulder, standing from the bed and looking over at him. "I've never been more excited for something." You truly admitted, kissing his cheek as Kylo sat there, still half asleep and trying to process all that you had said and done. "I've never really had much friends to be around—"

"You consider me a friend?" He asked in that husk, morning voice of his that made your heart flutter.

"Of course." You said, looking over at him with a genuine smile. "I know we've had a rough start... but you've grown. And I can never thank you enough for saving my life on Kamino."

Turning his body to face you, he shook his head. "You never have to thank me, princess. It was my fault that it all happened." He admitted as you sucked in a breath. "I... regret it. Very much. I should've... I should've never yelled at you the way I had. I should've never been such a fool and let childish reactions get the best of me because I—"

"Please, Kylo, you don't have to explain yourself." You shook your head, but Kylo frowned. "What's in the past... happened. And that's that. What matters is now and that you and I are growing together. I mean... you've taken me to lovely, unique places. You've put effort when you didn't have to. And that, I truly appreciate." You nodded with a soft smile.

Eyeing you, Kylo gulped before looking away. You were much too kind for your own good, and it bothered him that you had no friends back at your true home to appreciate it. Maybe that's why you were so humble... because you had never been so close to someone who wasn't family. And now you had Kylo. You only had Kylo... And that weight on his shoulders grew heavier at the thought that he was so horrible to you at first. "Princess?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you for joining me."

"I had no choice." You teased, causing Kylo to lightly smile. "But I'm glad I came."  
  
  
  


 **The Ewoks**  had been up bright and early and chose to dismiss the fact that Kylo was with you—after all, they believed he was your husband. It had seemed the Ewoks had made a new set of clothing for both you and Kylo; Kylo's was much similar to his previous one except he refused to wear the poncho and decided to just wear the shorts. As for you, you had a two piece top and skirt. The top was sleeveless and the skirt looked much like it was tied together.

After filling your stomachs with food the Ewoks happily made for you, you and Kylo found yourselves walking amongst the tall trees of Endor. The forest was vast and, although you found more debris, you looked passed it. Kylo had finally taken the time to explain the battle that had happened a year prior to his birth that involved the Empire and the Rebels.

"And there you have it." Kylo sighed. "It... isn't a pleasant sight but... that is the affect of war." He nodded as you had done the same. "But Endor is still captivating, to me at least."

"I agree." You smiled. "I love the vastness of green! Even though I saw lots of green back home... I feel there's never enough green. Especially now that I live on a snow planet." You chuckled. "I'm sure you can agree."

"I do." Kylo nodded. "Endor is one of my favorite planets, aside from Bespin." He admitted.

"Well, someday I must take you to Calidum and we can add it to your list." You winked as Kylo nodded.

"Tell me more about your planet." Kylo suddenly asked, your eyes widening as a toothy smile grew on your face.

"Really? You're interested?" You gasped as Kylo looked over at you.

"Yes, of course. You're quite enthusiastic about it... So, why not?" He shrugged as you held in a shriek.

"Oh, okay! Where do I start..." You tapped your chin. "I mentioned the weather before. Very sunny but can have weeks worth of rain! Lots of thunderstorms that look stunning across the ocean! My favorite days to relax and write... It helps the fauna grow stronger, too. Once the storms clear our, the nature around the palace is beautiful.

"The ocean is crystal blue and I love swimming in it. You can nearly see all the water creatures if you swim deep enough! It's also lovely to tan there." You chuckled. "The palace itself is a work of art and works with the mountainous terrain by the ocean. The surrounding city is the same... Calidum is known to be the paradise planet solely because it's almost sunny the entire cycle of the planet. It does snow in some parts of the planet but those are protected regions no one is allowed to live in due to the native creatures.

"There's just... So much about Calidum I love. We have a vast wild life preserve to help recovering and rehabilitating creatures. We have lovely museums and parks. There's also shoppes galore... There's even an art district! You would love it!" You nodded eagerly as Kylo smiled at your enthusiasm.

"Then, you must take me there one day." He nodded as you smiled at him. "Maybe once we marry... we can visit your home planet and you can show me all that you love about it."

"Oh, I would love that." You breathed, holding your chest as you beamed with happiness.

Slowing his pace, Kylo came to a sudden stop as you had done the same, following his gaze and overlooking a cliff that lead to a large body of water. "We're here."

"It's beautiful..." You gawked. "May we swim in it?" You asked.

Smirking, Kylo turned his head to look at you. "Why else would we come here?" At that, Kylo removed his shoes, ran towards the cliff and dove right in. Lifting your brows, you removed the shoes the Ewoks made you before rushing over and diving right after, crashing and submerging into the water bellow.


	24. Gorax

**Resurfacing**  from the water and taking in a deep breath, Kylo soon had done the same and caught your attention. A sudden outburst of laughter left your lungs at the sight of him. His hair was like a black mop on his head, covering most of his face before he dipped his head back into the water to push it all back.

"Didn't think you'd jump so easily." Kylo said as the two of you kept yourselves afloat.

"Why not?" You tilted your head. "Just because I'm a princess doesn't mean I can't be a daredevil." You smiled as Kylo faintly blushed in embarrassment.

"That's not what I— Never mind." He cleared his throat.

"The water is lovely." You said, eyeing your surroundings. "Thank you for taking me here." Smiling, you looked over at him.

"It was one of my favorite places as a child. Although... my parents didn't like for me to dive in unless my... father was with me." Kylo nearly mumbled as you smiled, wondering about his family and whether or not he was in contact with them.

"Well, now you can dive with me." You teased, earning a small smile from Kylo. You were enjoying the fact that he was becoming more expressive around you, showing other emotions that weren't anger or annoyance... rather, happiness.

"Yes, of course." He lowly spoke, keeping his focus elsewhere rather than on you. But you kept your eyes on him, watching as his eyes glowed under the bright sun, how his hair exposed his large ears... and how his skin looked so hypnotizing with the beads of water dripping.

Biting your lower lip, you shyly looked away, not wanting to stare any longer as a silence had weaved between the two of you. You wondered if he looked at you the way you looked at him. You knew he was handsome, knew he was an eye pleaser, but you didn't expect yourself to fall for him. At all. Maybe in the future after your marriage... but, within those weeks you had been around him—although turbulent—more and more of Kylo was being exposed. Those raw emotions he kept hidden that you wanted to see come to life.

Letting out an inaudible sigh, you looked back at Kylo. Eager to say something, to get a conversation out of him, you opened your mouth but nothing came out. You wanted to know him better, to know why he joined the First Order. Why he was the Supreme Leader. You were oblivious to a lot but you knew you weren't the only one in the galaxy.

Feeling your eyes on him, Kylo looked over at you, a faint blush on your cheeks as if you were caught staring. Just before you could look away, Kylo suddenly brought you closer to him as either of you tried keeping yourselves floating. Hearing your breath hitch the moment your body collided with his, his lips connected with your own.

Freezing in your spot for a moment as your heart sank, the heat rose to your face. It was like the first kiss you two shared, except this time, you were quick to reciprocate it. You didn't want him leaving you so suddenly like before. No, instead, your hand held the back of his head as you kissed back, keeping him there with you for as long as you could.

Gently pushing back, afraid of drowning, you took in deep breaths, looking up at Kylo and seeing he was bothered by the matter that you had cut it short. "Now you know how I felt when you cut our first kiss short." You said as Kylo's eyes suddenly widened, a smile growing on your lips as you slipped from him and swam back to shore.

Floating there for a moment with round eyes, Kylo blinked, snapping out of it before following you out. His heart was racing rather swiftly within his chest, faster than it had all the other times before. He felt himself grow antsy, body now eager for your touch no matter what it was. Whether a simple brush or another kiss, he suddenly found himself needing  _more_.

Watching you squeeze the excess water from your hair as you shined underneath the sunlight like a space angel, Kylo reached to the shore and rushed over to you, anxious to just hold you in  _some way_. To make skin to skin contact. He needed you and he needed to  _feel_  you.

Reaching for your waist and spinning you around, Kylo tugged you to him as his lips crashed against your own—harshly this time. It caught you by surprise, your heart skipping a beat, but when your body melted at his touch, your arms wrapped over his shoulders and you kissed him back with the same amount of force. You had never kissed anyone the way you had been kissing Kylo—or, at least, how he was kissing you. You followed his lead, heart throbbing in eagerness as the two of you stumbled back and fell onto the grass.

It felt right. It felt perfect—and not in a cliche manner... Rather, as if he had been your lover for all eternity and kissing one another was second nature. You wanted more and more, even if your lips were beginning to numb and your desire to breathe making the kiss sloppy.

Sitting in between your legs, on his knees as his hands pinned your own above your head, fingers laced, Kylo bit your bottom lip and tugged back before kissing your chin. Moving down your neck, your chest heaved before he made his way back up, kissing underneath your ear as you shivered. Lifting his head and looking down at you, your eyes were lightly hooded as you tried catching your breath, Kylo leaned his forehead against your own and shut his eyes.

Slowly shutting your own as your staggered breathing slowly went back to normal, you couldn't help but smile, more than glad that Kylo didn't hold back with you.

The two of you stayed in silence, nothing but either of your breathing and the nature of Endor filled the air. For a moment, you had nearly forgotten this was real life, believing it was a vivid fantasy, but when you felt Kylo kiss you once more before he could speak, you knew it was reality. "Thank you for forgiving me."

"I was never mad at you." You shook your head, but Kylo sighed. "I was hurt... but, seeing you on Kamino... you don't know how happy I was. To know that you cared, to have you come after me. To save me..." Feeling your eyes tear up, you took in a sharp breath. "There are not enough thank you's for that."

Shaking his head, Kylo released one of your hands before holding your cheek, caressing his thumb just under your eye. "There is no need for you to say thank you." He said, releasing your other hand and cupping both of your cheeks as you looked up at him. "I l—" Sucking in a breath, Kylo gulped. "I very much... I like you, princess. And I have made... far too many mistakes out of fear. But I refuse to any longer and I'm ashamed that it took you being kidnapped to make me realize." Kylo admitted as your heart skipped a beat, lowering his right hand enough to kiss your cheek. "I like you."

Smiling, you reached into his wet hair and brought his head closer to yours as you kissed him. "The  _Supreme Leader_  has a crush on a  _Princess_." You teased as Kylo sighed, reconnecting his lips with your own to kiss you.

"More than a crush." He confessed as your smile widened. "Just know that."

Nodding your head, your hands slid from his wet hair and pushed against his chest, flipping positions as you now straddled him. Kylo's eyes widened as you chuckled, leaning in and kissing him, hands grasping his face as his own carefully rested at your hips. "I would only hope so if we are to soon be wedded."

"You know very well that I like you not because of that." He reminded as you nodded.

"Of course." You said, kissing along his scar as he kept his eyes closed. "But it does help." You shrugged, leaning back and seeing a smile grow on Kylo's lips before falling against him. "I thought I'd be freezing right now but it's so warm out."

"I am, for one, warm with you on top of me." He mumbled as you laughed, wrapping his arms around you. "Is it not like this back home?"

"The weather is much cooler. So... it's quite chilly when you're soaking wet from the water." You explained, wet bodies pressed together as you laid under the sun.   
  
  


 

 

 **You weren't**  quite sure how much time had passed either of you by, seeing as you were almost fully dried at this point and had fallen asleep against the grass. When you had woken up, you rolled off Kylo and eyed the body of water from your spot. The way the afternoon sun shimmered against it, the gentle ripples and how the water brushed onto shore. It was beautiful and made you miss home... but nothing felt more right than being there with Kylo.

Shifting in his spot, Kylo sat up and eyed you. The way you rested on your side and gazed off. Leaning in and kissing your shoulder, Kylo grabbed your hand and pulled you to your feet with him. "We should head back." He said as you nodded, keeping your hand in his as the two of you aimed back for the trees.

"I would like to stay with you in your treehouse tonight." You spoke up, walking beside him.

"Then you better find a way to prevent the Ewoks from keeping you." Kylo sighed as you bit your inner lip. "They will keep you with them until we leave."

"They are very... nice to their guests, huh?" You breathed as Kylo shrugged.

"Only when they want to be." He reminded. "They can be cruel if they don't like someone. They're pretty smart."

"I wouldn't doubt it." You chuckled, suddenly shivering in your spot as your eyebrows furrowed.

"What?" Kylo asked. "What is it?" He questioned, seeing the look on your face.

"I don't know..." You shook your head. "I just— Something doesn't feel right? Like my instincts just went off? Do you feel something? You're a Force user..." You asked as you looked up at him, but Kylo shook his head and continued walking along with you, through the endless amounts of trees.

"I'm always feeling something." He admitted. "But nothing threatening at the moment. I'm sure it's nothing." Kylo assured as you nodded, although your grip tightened around his hand—and he noticed. "We're fine out here."

"You don't even have your lightsaber..." You pointed out, just realizing then that he never had it with him, leaving the two of you unarmed.

"Like I said, we'll be f—" Feeling the ground rumble as the trees shook, you and Kylo slowed your pace.

"What was that?" You curiously asked, unaware of the natural wonders Endor had to offer.

"I'm... not sure." Kylo furrowed his eyebrows, looking up at the trees and seeing the leaves fall from above—almost as if someone (or something) had hit the canopies.

Gulping, you tugged Kylo to keep walking on, but then suddenly felt the rumble beneath your feet yet again as your heart fluttered. "Kylo... I don't like the sound of that..." You said, stopping in your spot.

"Neither do I..." He grumbled, eyeing his surroundings before him.

Narrowing your eyebrows, you slowly turned your head to look over your shoulder, everything seeming normal until you saw a giant creature standing behind you, staring directly at you. Feeling your mouth fell open, as if to scream nothing came out until the moment the beast reached over and you forced Kylo to run with you.

Looking over and seeing the giant, Kylo's eyes widened. "Kriff, I forgot about those!"

"What are they?!" You exclaimed, trying to run as fast as you could with the being chasing and snarling.

"They're called Gorax's and they are not friendly!" He exclaimed.

Looking over once more, you nearly lost your footing and slipped from Kylo's grip, but before you could get back up and grab onto him, you were instantly pulled away from his reach. "Kylo!" You shrieked as the giant hand had engulfed you and took you away.

Spinning around and seeing your small figure being held in that of the creatures hold, Kylo reached out. "Princess!"


	25. Stars

**Running** as fast as he could to catch up with the Gorax, Kylo tried not to trip over any exposed roots. Reaching out and using the Force to toss a small boulder the Gorax's way, it did nothing but shove him, nudging him on a different route.

"Kylo!" You called out, only to smack your hands against the creatures rough one. "Let go of me! Let me go! I am not a toy!"

"Princess!" Panting, Kylo growled, sending more boulders the Gorax's way. "Kriff..." Knowing there was no use, he eyed the canopies, spotting the variety of vines that cross hatched all across the trees. "Dammit."

"Put me down! Put me down!" You thrashed, looking over and seeing how high up you were. "Don't drop me! Put me down the way you picked me up!" Growling at you, your eyes widened at the Gorax. "Hey!"

Smacking and punching the large hand that wrapped around you, you pressed your palms against it, trying to slide out, but knowing very well the Gorax's grip was far too tight. Huffing, you continuously thrashed around in hopes it'd loosen its grip, but nothing worked.

Then, suddenly, a harsh roar left the creature, and before you knew it, you were in the air. Your heart was in your throat as you yelled, suddenly free falling as the Gorax had tossed you in the air the second it had yelled. Screaming in fear, eyes welling up with tears as you squeezed them shut, you suddenly felt something tightly wrap around your waist.

Taking in deep breaths, you opened your eyes and saw streaks of colors fly by as your hair whipped around with the flow of the wind. "GAH!" You shouted, realizing you were high up again, latching onto whatever held you. "No— No! Kylo!" You yelled out, heart racing as you panicked. "Ky—" Coming to a stop as you were instantly brought onto a tree, you were pressed against the bark of it as something pressed against your mouth.

"Shhh." Looking up, your eyes widened. Hearing the heavy footsteps walk by, your head turned as the creature stomped by, growling and roaring in anger before leaving your sight.

Pushing back and lifting your head, you took in deep breaths. "H— How did you get up here?!" You asked with round eyes.

Looking down at you, Kylo searched your face as his hands held your upper arms. "Are you okay?"

"Were— Did you swing from the vine?!" You exclaimed. "Kylo!"

"I had to do what I had to, to save you!" He raised his voice. "So, yes! I swung from a wretched vine!"

Feeling a smile grow on your face, you wrapped your arms around his waist and leaned your forehead against his chest. "I have the Ewoks to thank, don't I?"

Frowning, Kylo sucked in a breath. "...Yes."

"As impressive as it is..." Lifting your head, you looked him in the eyes. "How are we to get down from here?"

Blinking, Kylo looked down from the tree, then back to you. "We..." Sucking in a breath, Kylo looked back down.

"You don't know, do you?" You arched an eyebrow as he sighed.

"We'll find a way... Somehow..."

 

 

 

 

 

 **The** sun was slowly starting to set as you and Kylo eventually made your way down to the grassy ground, more than glad to not have fallen to your death. You were also very thankful in the matter that you were no longer Gorax dinner... or whatever it wanted you for. Instead, you were now finding your way back to the Ewok village as you held Kylo's hand, for once wanting nothing more than to return back to civilization.

"I promise, tomorrow we will leave. I have one more planet for us to see before we prepare for our return and begin the... wedding preparations." Kylo breathed as you nodded.

"I never expected so much to happen in one day..." You said, feeling physically drained. "First, the dive... then our kiss and then the Gorax... Although, everything else was just fine up until now. I never expected you to swing from vines like an Ewok." You teased with a sweet smile.

"Without it, you would've been Gorax stew." He bitterly spoke, but you squeezed his hand. "Sorry..."

"I'm thankful." You reminded. "I just... rather be back with civilization."

"You didn't like Endor..." Kylo trailed but your eyes widened, stopping him in his tracks to look down at you.

"No! I mean, yes, I do! I love being anywhere with you and Endor carries its own beauties... but... I kind of miss having a real bed and... what not." You nodded. "It's lovely here, I'm glad the Ewoks enjoy me. I do." You said, looking up at him with a smile. "And I'm more than lucky to spend it with you..."

Looking you deeply in the eyes, Kylo's heart skipped a beat before you tiptoed and kissed him. "Thank you."

"Of course." You nodded. "You've proven yourself to be more three dimensional than you put yourself out to be." You winked. "I always knew there was more to you, Kylo Ren."

"What happened to Ben?" He arched an eyebrow, but you chuckled.

"Kylo Ren suits you best." You smirked, kissing his chin before continuing your walk, leaving Kylo to follow with a goofy grin on his lips that you had completely missed. Of course, he wiped it away moments later, but it was hard not to smile around you.

Returning to the Ewok village, in their world of treehouses, the Ewoks yelled at Kylo for his ruined outfit and made him leave the treehouse before they turned to you and praised you once again. You watched as Kylo had walked away, a small hunch in his back as you couldn't help but frown. As much as you loved the Ewok's attention, you preferred Kylo's. And, you rather have him happy than upset.

Changing once again and resting in the cot you temporarily claimed as yours, you tossed and turned for what felt like hours, missing Kylo's presence all over again. Huffing, you turned on your side and eyed the sparkling stars through the moonlight. "Starlight and moondust..." You muttered to yourself, thinking back to the dream you had with Kylo. A much happier Kylo.

Maybe it was a sign. One that was signaling change... or one that was presenting an altered future of happiness. Whatever it was, you knew it was happening. Kylo was opening up and revealing his emotions to you. And you knew he liked the freedom of being away. To be himself towards himself... and with you.

You just wanted him to know how much you appreciated that. How much you admired that coming from him. How much you loved seeing it.

Sitting up from your bed, you stood up and quietly walked out, made your way past the Ewoks and down the ladder. Nearly running off in the direction you recalled the treehouse being in—hoping you were right—you took in heavy breaths as excitement filled your veins. You had hoped he was awake.

Spotting the treehouse, you climbed up all the way to the top before walking towards the entrance; you were about to walk in, but Kylo beat you to it as he stood there. Almost as if he had been anticipating you.

Eyeing one another without a word, taking in deep breaths, you gave him a soft smile before he reached out and pulled you by the waist, into a kiss. The moment his lips pressed against your own, your heart broke through your rib cage as excitement rattled your bones. Feeling his hands hold tightly onto your waist, he brought you into the treehouse, towards a large bed that was illuminated by the starry sky.

Lifting you in his grip, your legs wrapped around his waist as he endlessly kissed you, hearts racing as your silhouettes were illuminated by the bright stars. Breathing against one another before he rested you on the bed beneath him, Kylo's hands began to wonder to your thighs as he then squeezed them.

"I can't sleep without you." You admitted, fingers running through his hair as you kissed his chin, then down his neck. "I don't know why."

Bringing you back into the kiss as he held your chin and parted your thighs with his free hand to sit in between them, your heart fluttered. "Me neither." Kylo breathed, kissing you continuously as you eagerly kissed back. "I always need you there."

Snickering against the kiss, Kylo only lifted his head. "You need me..."

Gulping, Kylo was about to lift himself from you in embarrassment, but you pulled him back to you. Burying his face in your neck as he grumbled into it, you couldn't help but chuckle, earning a disgruntled sigh from him. "Yes... I need you." He admitted. "I kriffing need you."

Reaching for his cheeks and lifting his head, you kissed them. "Must feel strange to need a princess, Supreme Leader." You teased, but Kylo squinted his eyes. "It's okay, I kinda need you to sleep, so... I suppose we need one another."

"Ugh..." Screwing his eyes back, you couldn't help but laugh as you pulled him back into the kiss, reaching for the hem of his shirt that he had changed into.

Gently pulling your hands away, Kylo lifted the shirt himself and pulled it over his head, tossing it to a side as you pushed him back and sat up with him. Roaming your hands along his chiseled chest, feeling the curves of his muscles as he faintly moaned into your mouth, you reached for your dress and began to lift it up, that is until Kylo stopped you.

Furrowing your eyebrows, you leaned back, "What is it?" You asked.

"I hate to admit..." Sucking in a breath, Kylo cleared his throat.

"Hate to admit... what?" You asked.

"That I've... dreamt of this..." He confessed as your eyes widened, cheeks turning red. "Kriff, I'm sorry—"

"N— No." You shook your head, taking in a deep breath. "I— I'm... I'm flattered? I think?"

"You think?" He arched an eyebrow as you nodded, only to stop for a moment, thinking about it, then nodding again. "I admitted to having sex dreams of you and you're... flattered?"

"Is... Is it wrong that I do feel that way? Because, I mean, I've had thoughts about you... I just— You're handsome..." You stumbled upon your words, growing more and more red in the face as Kylo searched your eyes. "I've always thought you were... even since the first day I met you..." You shyly spoke, biting your inner lip. "I shouldn't have because you were awfully rude to me."

Feeling his shoulders slump, Kylo frowned. "Forgive me... I never meant to be such way towards you." Reaching over and cupping your cheek, he leaned in and kissed your opposite one, then your nose, resting his forehead against your own.

"It's alright." You breathed. "That was then... and this is now." Tilting your head to a side, you kissed him once again, this time removing your dress and tossing it back.

Hesitantly reaching over, Kylo pressed his palms against your hips, shivering at the touch. Leaning away from the kiss, you reached for his large hands and pressed them against your chest, causing your breathing to quicken as he  gently held on. Holding his face, you leaned in and kissed him again as his fingers kneaded against your breast, causing a faint whimper to leave your lips before he pressed you back, against the bed and left a trail of kisses. Starting from your chin, working along your jaw, he kissed down the column of your neck and against your collar bones before leaving gentle bites against your breasts.

Running your fingers through his hair, gently tugging whenever you felt his teeth nip at your skin, subtle moans left your lips. Feeling his lips move down the valley in between your breasts, along your stomach and hip bones, Kylo stood up and removed the pants he had been wearing before he went for his underwear.

Hearing the sound of your breath hitch as his length sprung out, Kylo couldn't help but grown at the sight of your wide eyes before he crawled back over to you and held the back of your head. "Isn't it wrong for a princess to be bedded before she's wedded?" He teased, lips hovering over your own.

"I am about to be bedded by the man I will soon wed." You softly spoke with a wink, sitting up enough to kiss him. "I think I'm safe." You muttered against his lips before you heard him snicker.

Reaching for your underwear, Kylo tugged at the waistband. "I pray to the stars that an Ewok doesn't interrupt us."

Chuckling, you shook your head. "Then it's best we get on with this, Supreme Leader."


	26. Recollection (NSFW)

**Tugging**  your underwear down, away from your legs and sitting them on the edge of the bed, Kylo slid his hands along your sides as you shivered. "Kylo?"

"Hmm?" He hummed, lifting himself to look down at you. "What is it?"

"I don't want you to hold back." You breathed as Kylo blinked. "

"What?" His eyebrows narrowed as you nodded.

"Do... what you did to me in your dreams." You said, taking in a deep breath as Kylo lifted his hand up and caressed the side of your face. "Touch me, kiss me, whatever you want."

Sucking in a breath, Kylo eyed you. "I don't... I don't think you want what I want..."

"Why?" You frowned, caressing his biceps. "Are you afraid?"

"Somewhat..." He sighed. "This is your first time, Princess. I don't want to hurt you or ruin it because I get too deep into pleasing myself."

"I don't care." You shook your head. "I don't... I want you to enjoy this as much as I do. Please..." You begged, reaching up to hold his cheek. " _Please_."

Switching his focus between your eyes, looking back and forth, he nodded, leaning in and kissing your chin. "Okay, but please tell me if it's too much.  _Please_."

"Okay." You nodded, veins filling with eagerness as your heart picked up its pace.

Looking down at you, Kylo rubbed his thumbs against your hip bones before he massaged at your thighs. Lifting his eyes to meet your own, his fingers slid up your slit as you shivered. Rubbing gentle circles against your clit, Kylo watched as you squirmed, chest heaving as muffled moans were heard. Leaning in and kissing your shoulder, Kylo slid a pair of his fingers into you as your mouth fell open, his name slipping your tongue.

Continuously kissing your shoulder, Kylo's fingers began to pump, sliding in and out as your breathing grew loud. "Kylo..." You mewled, squirming as he lifted your leg over his waist.

Humming against your skin, Kylo pulled his fingers out as you let out an unexpected whine from feeling empty. "Shh..." He hushed, positioning and aligning himself at your entrance before entering you.

Feeling your breath get caught in your throat, your eyebrows scrunched up as Kylo adjusted himself. Tugging at his hair, Kylo took that as a go, pulling back and thrusting into you at a slow pace as either of your breathing filled the night air. Your chest ached as your body grew hot, Kylo's own breaking out into a sweat as he picked up his pace and watched your face scramble with emotions.

Caressing your cheek with his knuckles, Kylo leaned in to kiss you, making you put equal focus on the kiss and the movement of his hips. Letting a hand fall on to his back, clutching on and raking your nails along his smooth skin, your free hand grabbed fistfuls of his hair as you panted into the kiss. Trying to catch your breath as Kylo's lips hovered over your own, his hand slid between the two of you and rubbed at your bud, making you dig deeper into his back.

Then, all at once, your mind was suddenly infested with images—memories that seemed to have been long forgotten. The deeper Kylo went and the harsher your breathing had become, flurries of moments in your life you couldn't recall all came flooding back in.

_"Padawan— Ahem, I mean_ **_Jedi_ ** _Ben Solo."_  
_"Princess Y/N of Calidum."_

_"You shouldn't be here!"_  
_"Neither should you, but I came anyway."_

_"I think love you..."_  
_"_ _Well, I_ **_know_ ** _I love you."_

_"I'm afraid..."_  
_"So am I."_

_"Moondust!"_  
_"Starshine!"_

Feeling tears stream down your cheek, Kylo stilled his movements as he looked down at you. "Princess?" He asked as you cried out. "Princess, what happened?"

Pushing against his shoulders, Kylo pulled out as you scrambled off of the bed, grabbing your clothes and rushing out of the treehouse. Tugging your panties on and pulling the dress on, you panted, bottom lip trembling as you cried out.

You remembered.

You remembered it all.

It had all been taken from you, and now, it was back.

Pulling his pants on, Kylo ran right after you, reaching for you before you could leave. "Princess! Princess, what is it? What happened? Did I hurt you?"

Shaking your head, you whimpered. "N— No." Holding his arms as he held yours, you trembled. "No. It felt— It felt like we had done this b— before."

Blinking a few times, Kylo shook his head. "What?"

Frowning, your heart sank as you looked him in the eyes. "You... You don't remember..."

"Remember what? What is it? What's happening?" He asked, frantically searching your eyes. "Please, talk to me!"

"I know you." You breathed. "I've  _known_  you! For years! I've known you for much longer than we thought!" You exclaimed, tears dripping from your chin. "I— I keep having these weird dreams! Visions! And— And they're not dreams nor visions, they're memories I've forgotten!" You cried.

"Princess—"

"It's too much." You deeply inhaled. "You and I..." Frowning, you looked at him. "Ben..."

"Please... Please tell me what is happening." Kylo begged.

"I... I can't." Shaking your head, you slid from his grip and climbed down the ladder.  

"Princess... Princess! Don't do this to me!" He shouted, climbing down the ladder and chasing after you. "Please! Tell me what's happening! Don't run from me!" Reaching out for you, he spun you around. "Please, don't leave me."

"You wouldn't believe me..." You shook your head, but Kylo slid his hand down to your hand and held tightly.

"I will  _always_  believe you." He countered.

"I— Something was awakened within me and brought back memories that were long forgotten. Of you and I." You gulped as Kylo reached his hand up to wipe your cheek. "We were lovers... And someone or something took that from us. And now you don't remember."

Freezing, Kylo eyed you. "Lovers?"

"I loved you... I  _love_  you... But you don't love me and you won't remember..." You looked away. "I wish I could explain it... but not even I understand what happened. All I know is, the bodily connection, the intimate contact, it brought back what I had lost... but it didn't bring it back to you..."

Staring at you, unsure of what to say, Kylo took in a deep breath. "I—"

"I need to go back." You said as you sniffled. "I don't want the Ewoks thinking I left them." Slipping from his grip, you rushed off as he watched you with a racing heart.

Confusion filled his mind as Kylo stood there, no longer able to see you. How could you have remembered something as vital as that, but he didn't. Feeling his arm fall to a side, he slowly backed up, taking in deep breaths.  _I love you... but you don't love me_. The words rang in his head as his chest caved in. It wasn't true. He knew this. Because the moment he realized you had been kidnapped, to the second he had you safe in his arms, he knew.

He loved you.

So he ran right after you, refusing to let you slip from him so easily.

Spotting the Ewok village, your watery eyes looked up as you frowned. More tears slid down your cheeks, staining them as your bottom lip quivered. It was hitting you much too hard, the memories, the realization that the one person you loved most in the universe didn't love you back. He didn't remember what you two had. And now that you knew, your heart felt heavier than it did the moment you left Calidum.

Shaking in your spot, trying to lessen your tears, you sucked in a shaky breath and fell to your knees. Burying your face into your hands, you whispered, crying deeply into them as the night air caressed you. It was much too quiet out and your muffled cries echoed throughout the vast trees.

Why had you forgotten? Had someone done this to you? Or was it something else? You couldn't seem to think straight, mind not settling on one thing as you tried understanding the riddle. Your heart was a dead weight and your tears were its melted form.

Seeing the Ewok village come into view, Kylo heard faint sobbing come from before him as he lowered his focus. There you were, kneeling on the ground, hunched over as your body raked. Feeling his heart sink, he quietly and hesitantly walked over to you. Kneeling behind you, Kylo sucked in a quiet breath before wrapping his arms around your figure, resting his forehead against your shoulder.

"I may not remember, but I..." Tightening his grip around you as he felt your trembling come to a stop, Kylo breathed, "I do love you." Kissing your shoulder, he nuzzled your neck. "I love you."

Feeling your heart skip a beat as you took in deep breaths, Kylo breathed against you, holding you close to him. As your tears died down, you gulped, turning your head enough to a side. "Please... don't lie..."

"I'm not." He shook his head. "I'm not. Please believe me, Princess. I love you. If I never loved you, I wouldn't have saved you, I wouldn't have you sleep in the same bed as me... I wouldn't have shown you my study and I wouldn't have taken you to Bespin or here." He explained as your heart fluttered. "I wish... I wish I could remember. And I wish I wasn't such a kriffing scum to you since the beginning." Lifting his hand, he cupped your cheek as he lifted his head to kiss your other. "Maybe you can help me remember."

Turning to face him, looking at him with sad eyes, you slowly nodded as he ran his fingers through your hair, holding the back of your neck. "I wish you remembered like I did... You would understand how I feel... To know I had lost you for so long..."

"I may not know what if feels like, but I know pain. I've suffered on my own."

"You were a Jedi..." You nearly whispered. "You trained... And then, you ran to me one night and I lost you. I was in a forest and I just... You were gone."

Eyeing you, Kylo gulped. "I wish I could remember that... but all I can remember is turning..."

"Because you struggled... with the balance..." You said. "I know... I wish I had—"

"Don't." He shook his head. "I kept you alive, didn't I?" Seeing you furrow your eyebrows, Kylo eyed you. "If I— If I didn't truly love you then, something would've happened to you."

"But what if... What if this happened after we forgot?" You mumbled.

"Then... maybe you and I had to forget to keep you safe." He reasoned as you gulped. "What matters is the now."

"But—"

"Maybe I'll remember, and maybe we'll understand as to why it happened, but I need you to know that I do love you. I had then... and I do now." Kylo breathed. "I mean that." Removing his arm from you, he wiped your tears. "You wanted me to open up to you, didn't you?"

Softly smiling, you nodded. "Yes."

Leaning in, Kylo kissed you before pulling you to him, arms wrapped tightly around you. "I had fun today." He admitted. "Although I was a bit terrified when you were practically kidnapped."

"Me too." You smiled, nuzzling his neck. "I liked when we kissed on the grass."

Grinning, Kylo nodded as he sat back and brought you on to his lap. "Really?" He teased as you hummed a  _yes_. "I thought you liked me swinging on the vine more."

"Oh, yes, definitely." You chuckled. "I liked when we had to jump down from that last branch on the way down, you caught me but you caught me wrong and we both fell..."

"Why would you like that? My face planted right into your—" Stopping himself, Kylo pushed you back. "You liked that, didn't you?"

"Maybe..." You grinned as he couldn't help but laugh, kissing under your eye. "But... my favorite part, truly, is when you said you loved me." Giving him a loving look, Kylo caressed your cheek with his knuckles before grabbing your hand and kissing it. "Maybe it's not the same as before... But I think it's better."

"Why's that?" He hummed, continuously kissing your hand.

"Because... Because we don't have to hide and run around. We don't have to lie. Now I can marry you freely." You breathed.

"Hide? But your parents married you off?" Kylo furrowed his eyebrows as he looked down at you.

"They're... They're not my real parents. They're my adoptive ones..." You reminded as he nodded. "They never knew about you... or, maybe they did, but not through me." You explained. "They married me off to you, and... of course, I didn't want this, but now that I remember... Now that I remember it all, I want nothing more."

"Soon." He assured, lifting you higher to kiss you as you wrapped an arm over his shoulder. "But, we have one more stop before we return."

"Hmm..." You hummed, kissing him back before muttering against his lips. "Where to?"

"A lovely planet named Naboo."


	27. Naboo

**Morning**  had come swiftly after the two of you had made it back to Kylo's treehouse and rested. When you had woken up, something was there that wasn't there before. Something strong and in your heart; something that had been taken from you and was not returned. True love.

You didn't want to move away, lost in a trance as you gazed at Kylo's resting face, so calm and soft. Smiling at him, you leaned over and kissed his cheek, heart swelling up at the contact. The reality had hit you that it had technically been over six years since the two of you last saw one another.

Tracing his jaw, gently with your fingertip, you watched as he shifted beside you. Furrowing his eyebrows and scrunching up his nose, you held in a laugh before lifting your finger and reaching into his hair, twirling his locks. "Hmm..." You hummed as you felt Kylo's arm snake around your waist, pulling you even closer to him as he cleared his throat.

"We should leave..." He grumbled, voice husk and deeper than normal.

"May we say goodbye to the Ewoks?" You asked, rubbing your fingers against his scalp.

"Mmm... I suppose." Kylo sighed, rolling himself to rest on top of you. "If you keep doing that, I will fall back asleep."

Chuckling, you slid your hand from his hair and tried your best to shove him off of you, grunting in the process before sitting up and stretching. Just as you were, Kylo had sat up and wrapped his arms around your waist, nuzzling your shoulder. "If you keep doing  _that_ , you'll fall asleep." You nudged your shoulder as Kylo huffed.

"I suppose that is fair..." He sighed, lifting himself from you as you smiled, looking over at him and seeing the sleepy look on his face. "Let's get ready to leave." Kylo said, rubbing his face as he yawned.

Reaching over and lowering his hands, you kissed either of his cheeks, then his nose. "Are you sure you can fly your ship?"

"I'm positive." Kylo assured, grabbing your hands and kissing your knuckles before pulling you off of the bed with him. "I want you to see Naboo." Biting your inner lip, you looked away for a moment, earning a look from Kylo. "What is it?"

"I didn't tell you last night... but..." gulping, you looked back at Kylo, "I've already seen Naboo. You've shown me."

Blinking a few times, Kylo tilted his head. "I have?"

"Long before..." You nodded. "And... now that I think about it... it makes sense as to how Lando knew me. Because I knew him... You've introduced us before." You trailed, not remembering that you had gone to Cloud City with Kylo—then Ben—once, when the two of you had snuck off and flew over.

"Oh..." Kylo lowly spoke, but you lifted your hand to his cheek and smiled. "I wish I could remember..."

"It's okay." You nodded as he held your wrist. "It still feels like you're taking me there for the first time." Using your free hand to grab his own, you kissed the back of it before looking back up at him. "I'm excited either way, Naboo is beautiful."

"Then I guess we should say goodbye to those Ewoks and get going already, hmm?" Kissing your palm, Kylo held your hands as you nodded, leaning in and kissing your lips before the two of you got to gathering your things and getting ready to disembark.   
  
  
  


 **Saying goodbye**  to the Ewoks wasn't easy, they nearly refused to let you go, but with much persuasion (and promises of return) they eventually allowed you to go, giving you a goodbye gift of a cute pair of toys they made you that looked like both you and Kylo. You cherished it as you kept them close—although Kylo had found them to be creepy.

But now you were in the spacecraft that Kylo had been piloting, traveling towards Naboo. As the ship was approaching the planet, Kylo had spoken through the com link and requested a landing platform.

Leaning in your seat, eyeing the green planet as you entered its atmosphere, you smiled at the sight, not having seen the planet for so many years. You remembered the first time Ben had taken you, it reminded you so much of home. So bright and beautiful... it was home away from home.

Landing the ship, Kylo stood from his seat and left your sight. Standing from your spot, gathering your things, you patiently waited for him to reappear. As you waited, you eyed the dolls the Ewoks made you, amazed in its design and caught up by its uniqueness that you hadn't noticed Kylo had returned to you. "We can leave now."

Looking up, you arched an eyebrow, eyeing his attire. "You changed?"

"Well... We are on a royal planet. You are royalty, you have it covered. I... did not." He sighed as you smiled with a nod. "I have a few outfits that my extended family on Naboo has given me."

"The Naberrie's..." You muttered as Kylo looked at you, nodding. "Sorry, I—"

"Don't apologize." He shook his head, reaching over to hold your chin. "You've already met them, I'm sure." Nodding your head, Kylo kissed your forehead before slipping away, lowering the ramp and extending his hand out for you to take as he lead the way.

The walk wasn't too far off, walking within the alleys of buildings, over to a familiar home you had been to once before. Kylo's grandmother's family. The Naberrie's. You wondered if they had remembered you as you did them.

"Here." He said as the two of you approached the steps that lead to the entrance of the home. Coming to a stop at the door, Kylo was about to knock, but there door slid open.

"Ben!" The woman exclaimed, easily in her fifties or sixties. "Oh, it's been so long, I'm so happy you're here!" She greeted. You recognized the face of the woman that pulled Kylo into a hug. Pooja Naberrie, Kylo's mother's cousin. "And... you brought company! Oh... Oh, I remember you! The princess of Calidum! Y/N, correct?"

"Yes." You smiled. "Hello, Pooja." You greeted as the woman pulled you into a hug.

"Please, come in, I'm so glad you're staying!" She exclaimed. "There's a lot that's happened, hmm..." Pooja eyed Kylo as his cheeks turned red. "Supreme Leader of the First Order? If we weren't family..." She pointed a finger.

"Pooja..." Kylo groaned. "I'm here because I wanted to show my princess, here, Naboo. Although... she already has, but that's been... a while ago." He improvised as you nodded.

"Oh, of course!" Pooja nodded, guiding the two of you deeper into the home, past the dining room—where your eyes landed on the vast backyard. "I'll let you two stay in this room, Ben hasn't visited in some time so he does  _not_  get his own room."

"Thanks..." He grumbled as Pooja winked, opening the door and allowing the two of you in.

"I do like what you're wearing." Pooja pointed to Kylo's outfit. "I should get some for you!" She said, looking over at you as your eyebrows raised.

"Oh, sure! That'd be lovely." You smiled as Pooja nodded.

"Most definitely. You two enjoy yourselves, we will definitely have a dinner together in honor of our guests." She winked before leaving you and Kylo be.

"She's a sweet woman." You smiled.

"The Naberrie's are a unique bunch... My grandmother must've been that way, as well." He breathed with a nod, settling your bags to a side before he walked over to one of the windows and spotted the vast greenery of the backyard.

"Padmé must've been a lovely woman." You smiled, walking up to him and holding his arm. "I'd love to learn more about her someday."

"I'm sure you can ask Pooja... or my great aunt. She's around here somewhere. Still kicking." He nodded as you smiled.

"I'm sure at dinner I can, for now, I want you to show me the places you had in mind." You softly spoke, looking up at him as he turned his head.

"Well, of course, my princess." He winked, leaning in to kiss you as you kissed him back with a smile. "But why don't we share a shower first..."

"Oh, yes! Our 'first' shower together." You beamed as Kylo arched an eyebrow.

"Did we... share one before?" He curiously asked as you blushed.

"A few times... Once in a natural 'shower' when you snuck over to Calidum..." You trailed as Kylo's heart skipped a beat.

"Out in the open?"

"Mhm."

"No one... saw us?" He tilted his head.

"Nope! It was actually... really nice. Nature all around us and nothing more. Just the two of us..." You smiled.

"Would you like for us to do that... again?" Kylo asked as you tried not to grin. "I'll take that as a yes."

"Maybe someday, if we ever visit Calidum together." You nodded as Kylo reached over and cupped your cheek. "You'd love it. You already did before."

Leaning in and kissing your forehead, Kylo reached for your hand and guided you to the washroom. "I can only imagine how much we had done together..."

"Well, we're doing a lot together now." You nodded as he lead you, spotting the large refresher before he began to undress. "All because of you."

Looking over at you, Kylo took in a small breath, shaking his head. "If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have done any of this. I would've stayed locked up in the palace... but—"

"But, you love me." You teased as he nodded, blushing. "And you look so cute when you blush."

"Alright." Turning away with a huff of embarrassment, you chuckled before turning him back to you, tiptoeing to kiss him.

"You're still as shy as before." You grinned, swiping under his chin as he let out a disgruntled sound. "Oh, stop that!"

"Hmm..." Kylo grumbled, but you reached over and helped him remove the remaining amount of clothing before he reached for you and undressed you. Bringing you into the refresher with him, turning up the temperature, Kylo watched as you soaked up your hair. Trailing his eyes down your figure, he took in a deep breath and bit down, feeling like how he did the first time he had seen your breasts.

Hearing Kylo's huff, you turned to face him, earning a faint squeal from him. "Are you okay?"

"Do you understand how much seeing your breasts affected me?" He asked as your eyebrows furrowed. "When you had your dress at your waist! Why!" Kylo exclaimed as you slightly leaned back. "It haunted me. I had to masturbate like crazy!"

Smiling and trying to stifle a laugh, you shook your head. "Kylo, I've caught you before."

"You have?!" He panicked.

"Oh, well, not  _now_... I mean,  _then_." You clarified as Kylo gulped. "But, it makes sense as to why I woke up flustered a few times in the palace..."

"Kriff... Really?" Seeing you nod, Kylo sighed. "I'm so—"

"Don't." You shook your head, pulling him down into a kiss. "Like I said last night, I'm flattered."  
  
  
  


 **Sitting**  beside one another, eyeing the waterfall before the two of you, spending all afternoon visiting a few landmarks, the two of you found yourselves at Lake Country, relaxing in the nature. "Why don't you tell me your favorite memories?"

"With you?" You asked as Kylo nodded. "Oh... That's hard. There's so many..." You trailed, biting your inner cheek. "All my memories with you were my favorite. Every time I was with you, I was so happy. You were so happy. It was like... nothing every fazed us when we were together..." You smiled, thinking about it as Kylo looked over. There was a gleam in your eyes, the smile on your lips straight from your heart, it was clear just how much you had (and still do) loved him.

"How did we meet?" Kylo asked.

"You were placed on your first solo task, watching over me on a diplomatic mission." You explained. "It was my first solo mission as well... and you were put to protect me. We had hit it off very well, you were quite shy, but when you opened up, you were so expressive. There was so much about you that interested me, I never liked speaking about myself because I always wanted to hear about you."

Hearing your words, Kylo's heart dropped. "I... can't possibly be that interesting."

"You are." You nodded. "Believe me."

"Maybe then... But not know I'm a known killer. I massacred the new Jedi, I killed many lives..." Sucking in a breath, Kylo bit down. "I killed my father..." Looking over at him, your eyebrows narrowed. "I... I am not the same man you loved before, Princess."

"Don't say that." You shook your head. "If you didn't have instances of your old self, you wouldn't have saved me. You wouldn't have opened up. And you definitely wouldn't have fallen in love with me."

Eyeing you for a moment, Kylo shook his head. "I killed my father. I was going to kill my mother."

"And you regret it." You said as he blinked. "I can tell. You loved your father more than you put out. And you did it because you thought it would be easier for you, hmm?" Seeing him look down, you sucked in a breath. "I never really got to properly meet your parents... but I'm sure they stopped at nothing to prove that they loved you no matter what. You are their son after all."

"I betrayed them."

"You did what you thought was right. What your master must've made you believe. But, look at you now. You're the Supreme Leader. You can do more than you think." You said. "If you want to do what's right, you have the power to."

Lifting his head and looking at you, seeing your nod, Kylo reached over and held you closer to him, kissing your temple before resting his forehead against it. "You love me more than you should."

"I love you as much as I should." You corrected. "And more."

Breathing you in, shutting his eyes and listening to the distant waterfall, Kylo reopened them before he brought you on to his lap. "Would you marry me?"

Furrowing your eyebrows with a small chuckle, you leaned back enough to look at him. "Kylo, we're going to get—"

"No. I mean now. Would you marry me now?" Kylo asked.

"Now? Here?" Your heart raced.

"On this planet... Before we leave, yes." He nodded as your cheeks grew red.

"Is— Is that what you want?" You stuttered.

"Our wedding on Starkiller II is nothing but a ceremony claiming you're entitled to be my wife and to serve the First Order. If I marry you here, it proves that there is love and that it would be a  _true_  marriage. That death would do us part." Kylo said in a serious manner. "Marry me, here, on Naboo."

Smiling at him, you nodded. "Okay." Leaning in, you kissed him before resting your head on his shoulder. "You don't know how eager I was to marry you one day. To be yours forever..."

Resting his hand on your back, rubbing slow circles, his other arm tightened its grip around your waist. "You already have me now... and you know you'll have me forever."


	28. Varykino

**"You two**  want to get married?!" Pooja explained in excitement as she sat before the two of you, the dining table now clear from the dinner that was served. "Here, on Naboo?"

"Yes. If we are able to." Kylo nodded.

"Kylo and I are arranged to be married on Starkiller II... but we would like to be married here, beforehand. A proper wedding. A real one that is meant for love and companionship." You explained.

"Arranged?" Pooja asked, eyebrows furrowed.

Resting his hand on your knee, underneath the table, Kylo took in a small breath, earning your attention. "Its more... complicated than that."

"Explain." Sola—Kylo's great aunt, the sister to Padmé—then spoke, the much older woman who sat at the end of the table slowly leaned forward.

Looking over at his great aunt, Kylo took in a deep breath. "We were put into a marriage for mine and her planet's benefit. We... didn't know each other beforehand."

"What do you mean?" Pooja furrowed her eyebrows as the remaining family that sat around the table had done the same. "You two know each other very well!"

"The Princess does... I don't..." Kylo breathed, grip tightening at your knee.

"What?" Sola shook her head.

Seeing Kylo's solemn expression, you cleared your throat as you reached for his hand under the table. "Our memories have been... wiped. We had forgotten about one another, somehow. But... I have been able to remember them all as of recent." You faintly blushed, thinking about the previous night and... leaving Kylo the way you had.  "Ky— Ben has yet to remember."

"How is this possible?" Pooja asked, eyebrows narrowed, but you and Kylo only stayed silent, looking at one another, wishing you could understand. "Well, that doesn't matter now. You two will make new, everlasting memories." She smiled as both you and Kylo looked at her. "And we will start off with something as beautiful as a wedding."

"Let's have it on Lake Country." Sola said. "Just like his grandparents."

Looking over to her, Kylo's heart fluttered. "At Varykino?"

"Oh, that would be lovely! We must!" Pooja nodded before looking back at you and Kylo. "We will set everything up, you two won't have nothing to worry about." She smiled as you felt one grow on your lips. "It'll be a nice, intimate wedding."

"Thank you, Pooja." Kylo bowed his head.

"You two enjoy the rest of your evening, I promise you this will be perfect." She nodded as you felt your heart flutter with excitement, Kylo taking this as his dismissal, standing up from his seat as you followed suit.

"Thank you for dinner." You curtsied with a sweet smile before wishing them all a good night, Kylo tugging you away back to your shared room. "A last minute wedding, so spontaneous." You said as you entered the bedroom. "So much has happened in so little time, I can't help but feel as if I'm... floating."

Stopping before you, holding your hands and caressing your knuckles, Kylo kissed at your hair line before he kissed under either of your eyes. "Forgive me for if it is too much..."

"No." You shook your head. "I rather have this than nothing at all." You smiled, looking up at him eyeing him underneath the moonlight. "You don't know... how happy I am." You breathed, eyes tearing up. "Just the feeling... of knowing I hadn't seen you for so long. And just knowing you don't remember—"

"Princess," Kylo shook his head, reaching up to wipe your tears as a few had slipped.

"I'm sorry..." You breathed, but Kylo held your chin. "I know it just happened last night and it's fresh... it's just..."

"It's recent." He said as you nodded. "Remember what I said." Caressing your cheek with his knuckles, you nodded. "Now is what matters." Holding your face, Kylo eyed you for a moment, admiring the way your eyes shined underneath the moonlight. Your beauty made his heart race, the brightness that was held within your eyes... He felt nothing more but love for you. Overwhelmingly enough... in a good way. "I love you." He lowly spoke as a subtle smile grew on your lips.

"I love you, too." You softly said, reaching your hands into his, holding them before you tiptoed to kiss him, figures blending within the shadows of the moonlight.   
  
  
  


 **The sound**  of a knock on the bedroom door stirred you awake as you found yourself buried underneath Kylo's arm and the sheets. Adjusting, carefully lifting his arm from you, he only grumbled and held you closer. "Someone's at the door." You whispered, Kylo huffing as he lifted his head and waved a hand for the door to open. "Hmph..."

"Sorry for the intrusion, but..." Seeing Pooja at the door, you smiled. "Nearly everything is set for your intimate wedding." She smiled as you blushed. "I have breakfast prepared and your outfits will be waiting for you out in Varykino."

"Thank you." You smiled, excitement filling your veins.

"Of course, my dear." Pooja winked. "Don't take too long, some of us are eager to see this one be wedded." She nudged her chin towards Kylo as he grumbled. "It'll be lovely."

"I'm sure it will be." Kylo muttered into his pillow as he chuckled. "We'll be out soon..."

"Alright, you two." With a nod, she closed the door.

Nudging Kylo with your foot, you shook your head as he lifted his own to look at you, half of his face buried. "Be  _nice_."

"Hmph..."

"They're your family and they're helping us get married." You reminded. "They don't have to, you know."

"I know..." He sighed, scooting closer to you, nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck, taking in your faint warmth as he nearly purred. "I just want to stay here for a bit longer... This is our first time... cuddling." Hearing your giggle, Kylo lifted his head enough and kissed your jawline. "Your laugh is sweet."

"Thank you." You softly sighed, turning enough to face him. "Your voice is so nice in the morning."

"Nice?" He teased as you rolled your eyes.

" _Hot_." You corrected as he smirked. "Don't give me that look." Shoving your hand against his face, Kylo caught on and kissed your palm. "I'm excited."

Kissing down your wrist, he mumbled against your skin, "So am I."  
  
  
  


 **Standing**  by the window sill of one of the many rooms on Varykino, you eyed the distant lake with a racing heart, never thinking you'd get married the day after you were technically proposed to. To be fair... the man you were soon to marry is the man you were arranged to be wedded with...

The thought made you chuckle, how... ridiculous it had seemed, although it was real. Being put to marry a man you didn't know but ended up truly knowing—because he was the long lost love of your life. And even if he didn't remember what you had, he still grew to love you (again).

"My dear princess!" Hearing a voice call out from behind the door, you turned around.

"Come in!" Watching the door open as Pooja walked in, your eyes widened as she rolled in a dress case. "I have the most loveliest gown for you to wear. I am amazed I managed to get it for such a sudden wedding, but I had just... almost every right to get it." She explained as you nodded, closing the door behind her before turning to face you. "Are you ready?"

"Yes, of course!" You eagerly nodded, holding your hands together as you watched Pooja open up the case.

"It's a bit... old... but it's cleaned and as good as new." She nodded, stepping to a side and presenting the gown as your mouth fell open. "A beloved wedding gown under the Naberrie name."

"Oh my stars..." You whispered, walking over and carefully caressing the lace and intricate designs the gown carried on its sleeves, veil, and nearly everything else. "It's so beautiful... Insanely gorgeous..." You gawked.

"And it'll look even more stunning on you." Pooja grinned. "Let's get your hair done, nothing too insane, just a nice touch up!" At that, Pooja worked her magic.

Resting his palms on the cement ledge that separated him from the lake, Kylo eyed the shine on the water's surface as the sun reflected off of it. Sucking in a deep breath, Kylo lifted his focus to the mountains, then the bright blue sky before he heard distant footsteps. "I never took you for one to make such a last minute decision as important as this one."

"Neither did I." He truthfully spoke, turning enough to face his great aunt. "But I am."

Smiling up at him, Sola nodded. "Your grandmother would've supported this, you know? You may not remember, but the first time you brought your lovely princess, it was clear how much you loved her." She said as Kylo looked down at her, eyebrows lightly furrowing. "You still do. Maybe differently, but, you do. And you look very handsome."

Shaking his head as his great aunt teased, Kylo nodded. "Thank you... I wonder how my..."

"Mother would've felt?" Sola asked as Kylo stayed silent. "I'm sure the thought of you finding happiness in someone would make her happy." She nodded with a smile. "If I may ask... How long have you known you've loved her?"

Gulping, Kylo looked away. "Longer than I like to believe."

"Stubborn." Sola snickered as Kylo sighed. "Since day one? Since I'm sure the day you tried pushing her away, hmm?"

"It's terrifying how you know that..."

"Men can be easy to read." She teased as Kylo shook his head. "At least you succumbed to what was  _right_ , Ben." Sola held his arm.

"She loves me no matter what..." Kylo breathed. "I know she's too good for me, but I wouldn't dare let her go."

"Good. Keep her close, let her know you love her, don't hold back." Sola said before letting go of his arm. "Believe me. I know you. Don't  _ever_  hold back."

Looking over at Sola, Kylo nodded. "I couldn't. I held back too much before." Sighing, Kylo wiped his face.

"Good." Sola nodded. "Because after today, it is not best to keep anything hidden from your  _wife_." Blushing at the thought, Kylo nodded once more. "Now, let's get you married."

Leading Kylo to the small area he would soon marry you on. "Do I look ridiculous?" He asked his great aunt, eyeing the attire he had been in that was known as Naboo fashion.

"Nonsense." Sola shook her head, adjusting the robes her towering grand nephew had been wearing. "You look handsome and she'll love it." She smiled as Kylo took in a deep breath.

"Alright, she's ready!" Pooja called out as Sola nodded her head.

"Do not get cold feet, this was your idea." Sola pointed at Kylo as he furrowed his eyebrows.

With a sudden, intimate wedding, there wasn't much of a set up nor guests, but Kylo didn't seem to care; all he really wanted was you there with him, saying your vows and making you his forever.

It happened suddenly, his focus was caught as the small group before him turned their heads to you walking towards your soon to be husband. Your heart was racing fast in your chest, but your smile was brighter than ever. You couldn't seem to contain your excitement, wanting nothing more than to rush over to him and get the ceremony over with so you could officially titled husband and wife.

Extending his hand out for you to hold, you reached forward and blushed up at him by the way he was awing you, the emotion in his eyes that soon reflected in your own. As you came to a stop before him, held both of his hands, the small ceremony began and you couldn't look away from Kylo.

The sun was high and hardly any clouds were in the sky, the wind was gentle and the trees lowly rustled, as you looked in Kylo's eyes, you saw a shine in them that hadn't been there before. Something much brighter with the way he gazed down at you, the hazel color apparent, almost a hint of honey in them, and you couldn't help but tighten your grip around his hands.

Sucking in a small breath, feeling your grip constrict around his, Kylo gently rubbed his thumbs against the back of your hands, staring down at you with an aching heart. Your beauty never ceased to amaze him—inside and out—and with you there before him, sharing your vows, he couldn't believe it to be reality. Something as good and wholeheartedly as a wedding ceremony, on Naboo.

Watching the two gaze at one another Pooja smiled before leaning into her mother. "I have never seen him this happy before... It's radiating and pulsating."

"I always knew she was the one for him that first time we met her." Sola said. "She reminds me so much of Padmé... It's almost terrifying."

"Well... let us hope the situation has reversed... Maybe something within him will snap and he will do what's right for the galaxy with his newfound title."

"We can only hope." With a small nod, Sola and Pooja turned their focus back to you and Kylo as he had let go one of your hands and pulled you into a gentle kiss.

Kissing Kylo back, you chuckled as you leaned back, resting your foreheads together. "Am I Mrs. Ren now?"

"Hmm..." Kylo hummed. "You'll always be my  _princess_."


	29. Theed (Lightly NSFW)

" **I** can't believe how Pooja got a gown this beautiful so quickly..." You said to Kylo as the two of you walked arm in arm around Varykino. "Although, she said it was a Naberrie's..."

Clearing his throat, Kylo spoke up. "That's because it belonged to my grandmother."

"Really?" Your eyebrows lifted.

"Mhm." He nodded. "They showed it to me when I was a child, amongst many other things that belonged to her. They were intended to be given to my mother but she wanted to keep them in tact." Kylo explained. "It only made sense as to why they brought it out for you to wear."

"It's gorgeous, I can't seem to get over it." You chuckled as Kylo smiled, leaning over and kissing the top of your head.

"Would you like to visit the Royal Palace?" He asked as you lifted your head, instantly nodding.

"Yes, of course! I don't think I've ever been..."

"Really?" Kylo furrowed his eyebrows. "I never brought you there?"

"No." You shook your head. "Which is fine, everything else you showed me was beautiful." You smiled.

"Then, let's visit Theed."

 

 

 

 

 **Standing** before the vast steps, eyeing the palace before you in awe, you smiled. You always admired other palace's and their architecture, the way they looked completely different from your own, yet, just as beautiful. Feeling a hand on your hip, you turned your head up to look at Kylo with a smile. "Is everything in Naboo beautiful?" You chuckled as Kylo shrugged.

"Nearly. The Gungans aren't." He scoffed as your eyebrows furrowed. "You don't want to meet them."

"Oh... Okay." You nodded, Kylo gently pushing your back so the two of you could climb up the steps.

As soon as the two of you entered, Kylo guided you around, showing you some of the accessible rooms and opened areas. Walking down a hall and turning a corner, you had lost track of Kylo as you accidentally slipped from him, now searching for him and finding him standing before a painting.

"Is that her?" You asked, walking up to him and placing a hand on his arm.

Eyeing the painting, Kylo took in a deep breath before nodding. "Yes." Feeling you wrap your arm around his waist, Kylo lifted his own to place it across your back. "Padmé Amidala... Queen and Senator of Naboo."

"She's stunning." You smiled, eyeing the painting before you. "She must've had a lovely fashion taste... Her wedding gown and now this?" You pointed. "Your mother was the same... as far as I can remember."

Looking down at you, Kylo took in a small breath. "Did you ever meet her?"

"Not really, but, I've heard much about her. You had told me... others have spoken of her. She is a princess, after all... I was bound to learn about her greatness." You nodded as Kylo took in a deep breath, thinking about his mother. Had she still been alive? He was sure after what happened that day that she had died... but he never felt that loss... Not like how he did with his father.

Leaning in and leaving a long kiss against the top of your head, Kylo nuzzled his nose into your hair as he shut his eyes for a moment, breathing in your sweet scent before standing up straight. Spending the rest of the afternoon on Theed, walking the streets, sharing dinner at an intimate restaurant, the two of you then found yourselves near a cliff, overlooking the waterfall as the sun was setting.

Leaning against Kylo as he had his back resting against a large tree, you both looked up at the stars as the moons began to illuminate the sky. The natural sounds of the waterfalls and the wind, as well as the distant city, kept the two of you in a comfortable silence.

You didn't want to leave, you wanted to stay there forever, enjoying the fact that it was just you and him and no one else. But... he was the Supreme Leader and you were his soon to be wife (although, technically, you already were). The two of you had duties... you couldn't stay on "vacation" for so long.

You wanted to make the best out of your last day, knowing very well the following would be stressful with your return to Starkiller II. And you were sure it would be anything but pleasant for Kylo.

Turning to face Kylo, you sat in between his legs and held his cheek, kissing his other before you began to smother his face in them. Making your way along his jaw and down the exposed parts of his neck, Kylo took in a deep breath as you lifted your dress enough to straddle him, hands reaching into his hair. "I interrupted our supposed first time." You muttered against his skin as Kylo shivered, reaching over to hold your hips. "I'm sorry..."

"It... It's..." Sucking in a deep breath, Kylo gulped, tongue twisted. You had him so easily flustered with your confidence, something you didn't have a few days back.

"Hmm..." Chuckling, you lifted your head from his neck, kissing his lips as he instantly reciprocated the action. "We did just get married... We should celebrate." Hearing Kylo take in another deep breath, you grinned. Reaching the back of your gown to loosen it as your arms slid out, you let the dress fall to your hips.

Feeling his heart race, Kylo pulled you closer to him as you went to push off his robes, stripping him down till he was shirtless. "Bold of you to do this out in the open..."

"No one will see us, we're far from the city." You breathed, fingertips roaming along his shoulders, down his biceps and to his wrists. Lifting yourself enough to toss your gown to a side, you worked on removing the remaining amount of clothing on Kylo as the two of you began to pant against one another with the lack of separation from the kiss.

Reaching out and holding onto your back, falling forward with you underneath him, Kylo kissed along your shoulder, nipping at your collarbone as your eyes fluttered. Marking his way along your chest, turning his bites into kisses down your stomach and thighs, he slipped off your underwear before doing the same to his own.

Reaching up and pulling him back into the kiss, rolling him over for you to rest on top of him, you felt his hands caress the expanse of your back, trailing his fingers along your spine as his other squeezed at your thigh. Trailing your nails along his chest, reaching up and holding the back of his neck, Kylo buried his fingers into your hair, tugging before he rolled you back onto your back.

Lifting himself from the kiss and looking down at you as your chest heaved, he caressed your cheek and rubbed his thumb under your eye. "Making love under the stars, how poetic." Kylo teased, earning a playful eye roll from you before he gripped your thigh and lifted your leg to hook around his waist.

"What kind of wedding is it without consummation?" You winked as Kylo grinned.

"You're so very right." At that, Kylo aligned himself, sinking into your core as your sweet moans sounded in his ears.

Kissing along your neck as he began to thrust in and out of you, you held tightly onto his hair as your breathing and moans filled the night air, bodies heating up even amongst the cool air.

Soon after, you found yourselves holding on to one another, catching your breaths. Kylo stared up at the sky as you focused on the invisible drawings you created on his skin with your fingertip. "I hope nothing crawled on us without us realizing."

Sniggering, Kylo shook his head, rubbing his fingertips against your scalp. "With a pair of naked bodies on the grass, I'm sure something has."

"Lovely..." You chuckled, lifting your head and kissing under his jaw. "We should return to the Naberrie's... It's getting quite late."

"Mhm..." Kylo hummed. "Let us linger here a bit longer."

"Okay." You smiled, resting against his chest with your heart filled and body satisfied. "We love the grass, don't we?"

"I think that's a fair statement." Kylo agreed before he turned onto his side, looking down at you as he traced your jaw. "Mrs. Ren..."

"Yes?" You smiled, blushing.

"I just wanted to say it." He nearly whispered. "Although... I still am fond of calling you princess."

"Of course." You chuckled. "I'm sure now it's an affectionate nickname unlike before where it was nothing but a snarky remark."

"You used to only call me Supreme Leader..."

"I did..."

"Why did you stop?" Kylo curiously asked.

"Because, you weren't just an authoritative figure to me... you became someone. Something more to me. Whether you're Kylo or Ben... You're the same man to me." You said as you brushed your fingers through his hair before tracing the scar on his face. "What happened?"

Breathing in, Kylo held your wrist. "A battle with a Force user scavenger." He began. "She was much stronger than I believed her to be... It all happened after I killed my father. It had a heavy impact on me... more than I expected."

Slowly nodding your head as he kissed your palm, you sat up with him and held his face. "I'm sure much has happened since... since I last saw you. War and all... But, truly... I just... I want the now. What we have right now. I know it pains me to know what we had back then yet you don't remember... but— but, at least I have you. And... at least you're now my husband." You smiled.

"Hmm." Kylo playfully huffed. "An odd title for me."

"Well, it's yours now. No taking back." You winked before leaning in to kiss him, the two of you eventually redressing and returning to the Naberrie estate.

Sharing one last shower for the night, you and Kylo fell asleep easily in each other's arms before dawn. When the bright sun slowly seeped through the window as your bodies registered the light, you grumbled, burying yourself deeper into Kylo's chest and under the sheets.

Waking up to the feeling of you cocooning yourself before him, Kylo lowered the sheets to see your hair covering your face as you huffed. "What are you trying to do?" He lowly spoke.

"Hide from the sun..." You sighed. "It's much too early..."

"We do have to return to Starkiller, my love."

Smiling at the nickname as Kylo pushed your hair over your head, you sucked in a breath before opening you your eyes. "I know..."

Eyeing you, caressing your cheeks and brushing his thumb against your lips, Kylo leaned in and kissed your forehead. "I'll give us ten more minutes." Grinning at that, you nodded your head before shutting your eyes.

Those ten minutes had lasted longer than expected. After struggling to get out of bed, much too comfortable, Kylo guided you to the washroom, undressing the two of you and entering the refresher. Wavering in your spot, falling in and out of sleep, you rested your head on Kylo's chest as he snickered. "I have never seen you this tired before." He said, rubbing your arms.

"I think the idea of returning back to our realities is exhausting enough... You'll be busy and I'll be... on my own... doing stars knows what." You sighed, but Kylo lifted your chin to look at him, the tips of your hair becoming wet as you had pulled it into an updo to prevent it from being soaked.

"I will not neglect your presence, Princess." He promised. "I will make sure that I balance myself and make more time for you."

"Kylo, it's your duty to—"

"You are my wife, are you not?" He asked as you nodded. "My wife comes first."

Smiling up at him, you held the back of his neck as your free hand pressed against his chest, tiptoeing to kiss him. "Thank you, husband." Feeling Kylo's lips curl upwards in the kiss, you kept him in it for as long as you could, feeling the warm water rain onto your skin as the area fogged up.

 

 

 

 

 

" **Before** you two leave, I have a gift." Pooja said as both you and Kylo were just about ready to make your way to his ship. "I think... it is only fair to have something mark your milestone. I had something made just in time before your departure." Lifting a small, black bag, the size of one's palm, she handed it to you.

Reaching over, you gave her a smile before opening it up. Seeing something shine within it, you reached in and pulled out a pair of thin chains. "Are..." Sucking in a deep breath and eyeing the golden rings that hung from each matching chain, your eyes widened, "wedding rings?"

"Mhm. Well, somewhat, I didn't know your sizes so I made them equal in size. Yours carries Ben's name as his carries yours. To wear it close to your heart." Pooja smiled as you handed Kylo his while you placed on your own. "Never take it off, if you must hide it, do so underneath your clothing." She said as you nodded. "I know you'll be having a second ceremony, but this is my gift for the two of you. It was made out of jewelry your grandmother wore." She then looked over at Kylo, "take good care of it."

Nodding your head again, you smiled. "Yes, of course." You lightly laughed, lifting and eyeing the ring in between your fingers, reading Ben's name as it was engraved within the gold.

Placing on his own, Kylo read your name before sucking in a small breath, knowing very well he'd never take it off."Thank you, Pooja. For everything."

"Always, my dear boy." She smiled. "Always, as long as you love this lovely princess and remember who is most important."


	30. Home (Lightly NSFW)

**Taking** in a deep breath, Hux straightened his back before stomping over to the shuttle both you and Kylo were descending from. "Where have you been?! Your wedding ceremony is very soon and you must get to fitting!"

Waving it off, Kylo folded his arm for you to hold onto as you stifled a laugh by the way Hux's eyes widened in disbelief. Kylo so simply dismissed the general and continued off on his walk, leaving the hunger disgruntled and irritated. "Shouldn't we get to our fittings?"

"Eventually, yes, but we have just returned." Kylo stated. "I have a few things I'd like for us to do." At that, Kylo lead the way, away from the palace's hangar.

Recognizing the path, you knew where Kylo had been taking you to. You hadn't been there in quite some time, not since the incident of the painting, but you had grown to miss Kylo's study. "The study?"

"Yes." He nodded, waving his hand for the door to open as you instantly gasped at the mess around you. "I was frustrated with myself. After I had wrongly destroyed that painting and saw you cry, I came here and released my anger in a way I shouldn't have. I was upset at how irrational I was. I regret destroying that painting and the many others. I am... my own worst enemy."

Sucking in a small breath and giving his arm a small squeeze, you walked over, into the chaos and pulled out the paintings that were still visible. Eyeing them and wiping away the debris, your heart sank. "Kylo... these are all me."

"So it seems..."

"Did you paint these before or after I was brought here?" You curiously asked, but Kylo's eyebrows furrowed.

"Before... A few were after—"

"Before?" You nearly gasped before standing up. "Do you realize that you subconsciously did this? That somewhere within your mind, you do remember me?"

Blinking a few times, Kylo looked down at the paintings before slowly nodding. "That is a possibility..."

"Kylo... There's something within you that begs to be brought out. A piece that hasn't forgotten me." You smiled, suddenly full of hope. "There's a chance..."

"What if there's no way to help me?" He asked, but you shook your head and walked up to him, cupping his cheek.

"Believe me, there will be a way. You're already hinting at it." You said, pointing at the paintings. "We will find a way."

 

 

 

**Walking** hand in hand with Kylo, bundled up and wearing an attire more suited for the base's weather, Kylo led you to a bench just before a frozen pond. Sitting down, Kylo gently tugged you to sit beside him before wrapping his arm around your waist. "Isn't this beautiful?" He teased

"Much more stunning than Lake Country." You joked along, resting your head on his shoulder.

Using his free hand to rub your knee, Kylo then reached up and held your chin, leaving a kiss on your cheek that lingered. Smiling at the gesture, you turned your head to kiss him. Lifting your hand to hold the side of his face, your fingers tangled around his hair as he tightened his grip around your waist.

Leaning back and smiling up at him, you used the back of your index finger to caress his cheek. "I always loved the feeling of skin to skin..." You admitted as Kylo sniggered. "I do!"

"I believe you." He nodded as you continued to brush your finger along his face.

"Do you?" You softly asked, tracing his jaw before brushing your thumb along his plush lips.

"Mhm." Kissing your finger, Kylo grabbed your wrist and lowered your hand before leaning in and kissing you once more. "Although... I do enjoy kissing." He admitted as you chuckled, feeling him leave multiple kisses against your lips.

"Okay, I believe you." You laughed as he held your chin and the back of your head, endlessly kissing you as you kissed back.

Kissing along your cheek and jaw, under your ear, Kylo lifted his head and looked down at you as you smiled up at him. "You're so beautiful."

Reaching up and trailing your finger down his scar, looking up at him, you breathed, "You're so handsome."

"Is that so?" He asked as you bit your bottom lip and nodded. "Maybe on the outside."

"How can you be handsome on the inside?" You winked as he rolled his eyes, pulling you back into the kiss once more before the two of you decided to retreat back into the palace.

Sharing an intimate dinner in the dining hall as you sat at the end of the table with Kylo diagonal to you, quietly speaking to one another as you shared a few stories from back home, the two of you soon found yourselves walking along the palace's halls.

"I have to ask," Kylo began, "that day... when your gown was—"

"When you saw my breasts?" You snickered as Kylo sighed. "I was wondering when you'd ask..."

"It's been lingering on the back of mind for quite some time now..." He admitted as you grinned.

"Did seeing my breasts turn you on?" You teased as Kylo sucked in his breath, instantly giving you his answer with that.

"I asked my question first." He stated defensively as you shook your head.

"I was checking my ribs to see if you had bruised them." You lowly spoke, looking ahead.

Blinking, Kylo looked over at you with furrowed eyebrows, trying to recall as to how he could've done such thing. Then, he remembered. When he held you tight that one morning and led you into the dining hall. "Kriff..."

"I was fine, just a little red—"

"I never... I never meant to hurt you." Kylo shook his head, then turning to face you. "I was bitter..."

"Bitter?" You asked, looking up at him with your eyebrows narrowed. "Over what?"

"Everything." He breathed, looking away for a moment. "I was put in a marriage that I did not expect myself to fall for the woman so suddenly. I was defensive when I first met you because you were so... You were different from me. Beautiful and sweet, and the aura you had around you... I hated how my heart was in my throat when I first saw you. I hated the look on your face when I was a complete bastard towards you. I wanted to keep you away because I knew there was something growing within me, and when you had left and had been kidnapped, I knew I had to grow up." Kylo breathed before looking into your eyes.

"I was afraid you had loved Daniel, that you'd want him instead... I couldn't stand him. He threatened me by saying he was stepping in because I wasn't being there for you. But then he tried to kiss you and I had walked in and you looked so uncomfortable and out of place... One thing led to the next and I... hated myself for what I put you through. I did."

Looking up at him and seeing the tears pool up in his eyes, you reached up and held his face. "I fell for you, long before I had kissed you on Eadu, and I know now that it's because I loved you. It tore me apart when you ran off because I was so kriffing stupid and scared you away." He spoke through tight teeth as tears began to slip. "My anger and narrow-mindedness always had the best of me and I..." Taking in a deep breath as he shook his head, you frowned, "I couldn't live with myself knowing I was the reason you were put in harms way. I had to find you. No matter what..."

"And you did." You reminded him, brushing his tears away. "You brought me home, and I was safe with you... and Phasma, in that ship and in this palace. I was upset but that anger didn't last all that long because I was never one to hold grudges. And, truth be told, I... I had a lot of hope in you. I believed in you. And I was right." Giving him a sweet smile, Kylo slowly nodded before leaning in and resting his forehead against your own. "I always said that I wasn't here to change you... but I was here to make you see the good in life."

"Thank you." Kylo breathed before kissing your cheek and pulling you into his arms.

"We were meant to get through this together. No matter what... And, we are." You lowly spoke. "Maybe that's why we lost what we had, maybe that's why we're here now. To start all over."

"Maybe." Kylo breathed as he caressed the back of your head. "I thank the stars for having you by my side."

Smiling at his words, your grip tightened around him as the two of you stood in the hall with the setting sun causing a gentle hue to reflect on the two of you, a kiss being shared as you refused to let one another go.

 

 

 

 

" **You** loved calligraphy when we were together." You spoke as you sat on his bed, flipping through his book of calligraphy. "I'm happy to see you still do."

"It's a sort of... relaxer for me. I have more in the study." Kylo said as he walked over to rest beside you, the two of you now in your nightwear. "I was happy to see you trying."

"I had found a set and I tried it out." You breathed. "I wrote about you."

"I remember." Kylo nodded with a faint blush.

"It makes sense as to why I was so invested in making things about you... You were subconsciously my muse." You smiled before closing the book and settling it on your nightstand, reaching over to Kylo and placing his head on your lap. "I was always yours..."

"Why shouldn't I focus on such beauty?" He asked with a faint grin as you shook your head. "Although, I always had you as my muse before even knowing you."

"We were meant to find one another again." You said as Kylo reached up and stroked your cheek. "And we were meant to be together."

Nodding, Kylo eyed you as you leaned into his hand and shut your eyes. Sitting up and turning on his knees to face you, Kylo held the back of your neck and pulled you into a kiss, bringing you close to him as he lifted your nightgown and pulled it over your head. Feeling your bare skin against his fingertips, Kylo fell back with you on top of him as his hands roamed along your sides and on to your behind to give your bottom a squeeze.

Running your fingers through his hair, you reached down to his sleeping pants and lowered them enough for his length to spring out. Slipping out of your own panties, you began to grind against him as his grip latched onto your hips. Breathing against one another, Kylo guided himself into you as your heart fluttered. Adjusting yourself, you began to circle and thrust your hips as Kylo lifted his own to meet yours.

Caressing one another's skin, kissing and panting, you soon came and milked Kylo of his own, finding one another resting on the bed. Facing one another as you eyed each other with hooded eyes, your fingers brushing through his hair as your leg rested over his hip, Kylo trailed his fingertips up and down your spine.

Scooting closer to him and burying your face into his chest, being encased in his arms and warmth, you smiled. "I love you."

Holding the back of your head as he gently rubbed at your scalp, Kylo kissed the top of your head. "I know."

 

 

 

 

" **How** long will this take?" Kylo huffed, impatiently waiting for you as you were being fitted into multiple wedding gowns. His attire wasn't much too hard to work on, seeing as it would look like his normal outfit but slightly altered. "We've been here for hours. This can't possibly take forever." He snarled.

"It's a fitting, Supreme Leader." Phasma reminded, standing beside him as she was forced to suffer alongside him. "The wedding is tomorrow. No one told you to pull this off last minute."

"I wanted to spend the day with her yesterday." Kylo defended.

"As well as all of last week on different planets without a word?" Phasma hummed as Kylo narrowed his eyes. "I will admit, I am glad the two of you came back happy and together. It seems as if you've pulled your head out of your behind and manned up." She snickered as Kylo shot her a look.

"Very funny." He growled.

"You know I'm right." Phasma smiled from within her helmet. "You loved her all along."


	31. Vows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FYI the vows are completely made up but Celtic vows influenced me!

**Starkiller** II hadn't had a single day without snowfall since the moment you had moved into the palace; whether it was heavy or light, it was always snowing... but today, it wasn't. Looking outside and seeing the sun in the sky, seldom clouds blocking its way, you sucked in a small breath before looking down at your chest. The ring that hung there, gifted by Pooja. Smiling and reaching for it, you read the engraving.

Ben Solo.

It was almost as if you were married to two men—Ben Solo on Naboo and Kylo Ren on Starkiller II. Either way you saw it, you were happy. Although you saw Ben Solo as his past self and Kylo Ren as his present self, to you, he was the same man.

Hearing a knock on your door, followed by Low making its way in, you turned and smiled at the droid. "Princess, are you ready?" Low asked as you nodded, the tailor walking in with her aides, gesturing for you to get on the platform.

Removing the silk robe you had been wearing, the women surrounding you began helping you into your strapless gown. It almost reminded you of snowflakes with its design, the white under layer, covered in intricate silver designs as it hugged your torso before fanning out at your waist. Placing the sheer cape over your shoulders with its shimmering design that matched your gown, you eyed yourself in the mirror.

"Princess... will you be keeping that necklace on?" The tailor asked as you sucked in a breath.

"Yes." You nodded. Although it was gold, you refused to remove it. "It holds dear to my heart."

"May I suggest you wear it like a bracelet?" She asked as you sucked in a breath, eyeing it. "Let me show you..." She gestured as you removed the necklace. Taking it in her hands, she wrapped it around your wrist just enough for the ring to hang like a pendant. "Perfect."

"Thank you." You smiled before they helped you off of the platform, placing the matching heels on your feet before they gave you the finishing touches—a crown like veil.

"You look magnificent!" The tailor shrieked in excitement as you blushed. "Are you ready?"

Nodding eagerly, the women around you clapped as you chuckled. "More than ever."

"Absolutely wonderful! Then, it's time!" At that, the women guided you outside of the room before a pair of Knights took over and lead you to the throne room. As you were walking along, heart pounding within your ears, you couldn't seem to focus as the duo came to a stop, causing you to nearly trip.

"Y/N." Lifting your head and seeing Phasma, you smiled. "I've been requested to walk you down the supposed aisle." She said with a small sigh as your grin grew in size.

"Requested?" You arched an eyebrow.

"I think you know who." She leaned forward, hidden behind her helmet.

"Ahhh... Of course." You nodded.

Folding her arm and reaching out for you, Phasma took a step forward. "Shall we?"

Taking her arm, the Knights opened the throne room's doors for you as the two of you walked in. The sound of gentle music began to play as you took in a deep breath, the throne now set up with rows of chairs that were filled with all sorts of upper ranked officers. As your eyes trailed along, they then landed on the three people who stuck out from them all—your family.

Smiling as your family turned their heads to look at you, you gave them a bright grin as they reciprocated the gesture. Shifting your focus from the trio, over to the steps of the throne, your heart fluttered at the sight of Kylo. His attire was much like it always was with slight alterations: hints of silver that balanced your own.

Looking over at you, Kylo's heart sank at the sight of you in your own wedding gown, your hands clutching onto the bouquet of flowers as your face was lightly covered by your veil. More than eager to reach over for you, Phasma handed you over as you quietly thanked her.

Seeing Kylo stick his hand out, you took it in your own as your eyes stayed locked. Seeing the pure awe in his pair, your heart raced within your chest, looking up at him with such adoration.

Neither of you dared to look away as the ceremony had begun. With your left hand holding Kylo's right, a red ribbon was tied around either of your wrists to keep your hands together, your fingers were interlocked. Your bouquet was replaced with Kylo's lightsaber as the two of you had your palms open to hold it, together.

It was as if it was only the two of you were in the room, no one else around. Nothing but silence filling the air when you exchanged vows.

 

“You do not belong to me for we are one

Your blood is my blood, and there shall be nothing but love

Your heart connects to mine and for that we stay alive

I shall watch over you even when you are blue

You are my light and my stars for when I am lost in the dark

I will protect you, I will never neglect you

For you and I shall stay together for life”

 

Watching as the officiator named you husband and wife, Kylo instantly leaned in, pressing his lips against your own as you smiled into it and kissed him back.

"I love you." You muttered against his lips.

"I love you." Kylo whispered back, kissing you once more before he clipped his lightsaber back to his belt and reached to hold the back of your neck, deepening the kiss. Just as you were about to reach up and hold his cheek, Kylo suddenly leaned away, confusion in his eyes as he swayed.

"Kylo?" You asked, but before he could respond, he collapsed, causing the ribbon wrapped around your wrists to untie and fall with him. "Kylo?!" Falling to your knees and making sure he was breathing, your heart raced as you panicked, calling his name multiple times before the Knights had rushed over and lifted him in their arms.

Quickly carrying Kylo's unconscious body out, you stood up and lifted your gown, running after as the crowd had watched in awe, voices echoing throughout the tall walls as words filled the air. Your worry filled your veins, fearful and suddenly overthinking what could've happened to Kylo. Had someone done something?

Turning corners and running into the palace's med wing, you were suddenly held back. "Let go! Let go of me! I must see him!" You cried out.

"Y/N, you will see him but the doctor must see him first." Recognizing that voice, you looked over to see Phasma

"He's my husband. I need to be in there with him." You snapped, clenching your fists.

"You will only get in the way of them." Phasma stood her ground as you frowned. "I know you are worried, but, believe me, he will be fine."

"How do you know?" You shook your head. "He could be on the brink of death for all we know! Someone could've poisoned him! Tried to kill him!"

"Listen to yourself!" Phasma raised her voice. "Kylo will be fine. You need to be optimistic."

Gulping, you slowly nodded, turning your head to see the Knights emerging from the room, standing just outside the door and keeping guard. "How long will I have to wait? I have to see him..." You muttered, tears slipping down your cheek. "We just got married..." You whimpered.

"Soon." Phasma said, placing a hand on your shoulder. "Everything will be alright."

Standing there and staring at the door, holding your arms together, you bit your inner lip in fear. Shifting your focus to the two Knights, you gulped before walking over, dismissing Phasma before she could stop you.

"Princess..." The Knight to your left spoke as you bowed your head, looking over at the door, almost as if expecting someone to walk out. "He will be fine."

"That's what Phasma says..." You muttered, tears welling in your eyes. "I just want to see him..."

"I know, and you will—"

"May I go in?" You asked, looking to the Knight on your right that stayed silent. "I need to see him, please." You begged.

Looking over at you, then their fellow Knight, they sucked in a breath and nodded. "You are his wife, after all." Watching from afar, Phasma sucked in a breath before shaking her head.

Seeing the Knight on the left open the door, you sucked in a breath before walking in, spotting Kylo resting on the cot. Quietly moving closer, you then caught the doctor's attention. "Oh, hello, Mrs. Ren." She spoke as your heart fluttered at the sound of Mrs. Ren. "I am doctor Harna."

"Hello, doctor..." You softly responded. "I'm sorry if I'm in your way... I had to see him."

"All is well." She nodded. "But, since you're here already... I must tell you..."

"Tell me what?" You gulped as your eyebrows furrowed.

"Well, from what I can see, there seems to be nothing wrong with the Supreme Leader." Harna said as you shook your head in confusion. "One can faint from over exertion, not eating, a sickness... but he shows no symptoms of anything wrong. He's quite healthy. He's actually sleeping and eating more and I believe that's all thanks to you." The woman slightly smiled as you gulped.

"He... He didn't before?" You asked as your eyes shifted to Kylo.

"No, hardly." Harna sighed. "Barely slept nor ate. He was straining himself and it was only becoming worse after the destruction of Starkiller Base. But, now? Well, he's doing much better." She said as you sucked in a small breath.

"Then... Then how is it that he fainted? He was perfectly fine this morning and during the ceremony up until we kissed..." You frowned.

"I have to run these blood samples I took and see if I can find any irregularities." Harna said.

"Could someone have poisoned him?" You asked. "Or me and I transmitted it with my lipstick?"

"There is possibility but I highly doubt it... Like I said, I have to run the blood samples. If I find something I promise to come to you immediately." With a nod, she left you alone with an unconscious Kylo.

Looking over at him, your heart sank as your frown reappeared. Walking to his side, you ran your fingers along his hairline, down to his jaw. "You better not have fainted because we had two weddings and there was too much love for your black heart to handle." You teased with a small smile, brushing your thumb against his bottom lip before reaching for his hand. "Do we consider this our honeymoon? Me watching you sleep?" You sniffled, eyeing his gloved hand. Pulling it off by the tips of his fingers, your heart fluttered at the sight of the wedding band Pooja had made for him. Smiling as you lifted his hand, eyeing the golden band that read your name, you kissed where the ring sat.

Taking in a deep breath, resting your forehead against the back of his hand, you shut your eyes and prayed to the stars that everything was alright with your husband.

Then, you heard faint groaning followed by shifting as Kylo's hand slid from you. Feeling your heart skip a beat, you looked up to see Kylo trying to lift himself up.

"Kylo?" You breathed.

Lifting his head, Kylo looked at you as his eyes widened. Instantly reaching for you and nearly falling off of his bed, your heart skipped a beat as you instantly wrapped your arms around him before either of you could collide with the ground.

"Kylo? Kylo, is everything alright?" You asked as he tightened his grip around you. "You gave me a scare, I thought something happened to you, that you were poisoned! That someone tried killing you at our wedding!" You exclaimed as you nearly panted. "I can't understand as to what happened or why, you don't know how worried I was! Phasma tried stopping me from coming in here to see you but thankfully the Knights let me in and— and..." Taking in a deep breath, you shook your head, feeling a few tears slip. "I was scared that I assumed the worst! I thought you were—"

"Starlight." Hearing his voice speak the nickname you never expected him to remember, you froze in your spot as your eyes widened.


	32. Mrs. Ren

**Feeling** your heart skip a beat, you leaned back and looked Kylo in the eyes, cupping his cheeks as you took in deep breaths. "You remember?" You nearly whispered as he nodded. "Why did you leave me?!" You shouted, shoving him back. "That night! When you met with me in our usual spot on Calidum! You left me! I was alone and afraid!" You cried out as Kylo reached for you, but you shook your head.

"I—"

"I was so confused! My heart felt so heavy and there was so many tears! When I had forgotten everything I had no idea as to why I was crying so much!" You shook your head. "I loved you and you knew that!"

"I loved you, too—"

"If you did, you wouldn't have left me!" You exclaimed, trying to shove him away, but Kylo pulled you on to his lap and into his chest. "You wouldn't have left me there with a broken heart..." You whimpered, trembling in his hold.

"I couldn't bring you with me. It was far too dangerous and not a place for a princess—"

"But I'm here now..."

"It's different." Kylo shook his head. "I am the Supreme Leader now. Before... I was a soldier, I wasn't in control. You know I would never forgive myself if something were to have happened to you that meant I lost you forever."

"You almost had..." You hiccuped.

"But I didn't. You're here, now. We may have forgotten one another for a period of time, but at least you're still alive." Kylo said, holding you tight to him. "If I had never left you, if I had stayed... trouble would've followed. Something terrible would've happened."

"We had forgotten one another... We were destined for trouble to follow us in one form or some other..." You lowly spoke, holding fistfuls of his tunic.

"Yes... But, now we remember." He breathed, leaning in and tilting his head to bury within your neck.

Sucking in a deep breath, trying to calm your emotions as you breathed him in, reminding yourself that he was real, you stayed in his arms for as long as you could, not seeming to care if others had been worried or if your wedding had been interrupted.

Time had passed and you weren't sure how much had, a knock was heard from outside as both you and Kylo lifted your heads. "Come in." You spoke up before looking back at your husband, reaching a hand up to hold his cheek before you kissed his other.

"Pardon me." Recognizing that voice, you looked over to see your mother. "I had to come here as soon as I could... I was held back, no one was allowed to follow..." She sighed.

"Mother, how come you're here?" You asked. "I didn't think you, nor father, would be here?"

Smiling, she lifted her hand, "He invited us."

Looking back at Kylo, he gave you a small nod as your heart fluttered. "Thank you." You smiled, then looked back at your mother. "I'm glad you're here."

"Anything for my princess." She smiled as you smiled back. "But, I must confess, there's more reasoning behind my coming here."

"What is it?" You asked, eyebrows furrowed.

"It's about you two, my dear. You and... Ben." At the name, both you and Kylo grew wide eyed. "You can not think I was oblivious to the matter?"

"The matter?" You tilted your head.

"You and Ben sneaking around to see one another." She chuckled as you blushed. "I know you did it because neither of you wanted to get caught, mainly because Ben was supposed to be training and guarding." Your mother arched an eyebrow as Kylo took in a deep breath. "I was never opposed to you being together, you were willing to run around with the chances of being caught to see one another."

"Really?" You asked as she nodded.

"Yes... And I was there when you and Ben had last seen each other before..." Sucking in a deep breath, your mother waved her hand. "I had followed you out because you had been acting strange during the time... You were worried, almost as if you felt it coming. When Ben had met up with you in the forest to say goodbye... you were so heartbroken, yelling for him, but then something happened and... you forgot about him. You asked me where you were and why you were there..."

"You were there..." You muttered as she nodded. "Then, what happened to us?"

"I don't know. It just... happened..."

"The Force." Kylo spoke. "It must've been." Looking at him, Kylo tightened his grip around you.

"I saw the opportunity for an arranged marriage, although years after you two forgot one another, I believed... I knew something would help trigger the memories. I had prayed to the stars they would." Your mother admitted. "And the stars listened..." She smiled. "The connection was severed, but now that he truly has you, he gained everything back."

Taking in a deep breath and nodding, you looked over at Kylo and rested your forehead against his temple. "Thank you, mother."

"Of course." She nodded, walking closer and patting your knee. "I may not be your biological mother, but know that I will always want what's best for you."

"I know." You softly spoke, taking her hand for a moment and squeezing it before she let go.

"Before I leave, I suggest you two spend your honeymoon on Calidum... I think it's been a while for the both of you." She winked as you nodded. "You two will always have a home there." With a sweet smile, she turned away and left the room, letting you and Kylo be for the night.

Leaning back and looking at Kylo, you smiled. "What do you think?"

"About Calidum?" He asked as you nodded. "I think it's only fair." He smiled.

"There's no rush, I just want to make sure you're fine, first." You breathed, giving him a small kiss before standing from your spot as Kylo furrowed his eyebrows.

"Where are you going?" He asked, but you lifted a finger.

"I think it's only fair to let your loyal Knights and Phasma know that you're doing okay. I did... kind of... almost started a ruckus." You shrugged but Kylo grinned. "I was worried."

"I know." He nodded. "Don't take too long."

"I won't." You smiled before leaving the room. Just as you did, you came to a stop as all six Knights stood there alongside Phasma. "Oh... Your Supreme Leader is doing well. Thank the stars." You nodded as the Knights let out faint sighs in relief.

"Finally." Hearing a huff, you looked over to see Hux stomping over. "There was a ruckus out there! I thought he was just causing a scene cause he is naturally dramatic!"

Narrowing your eyes, Phasma reacted before you could, turning and taking a step before you, preventing Hux from approaching the room. "Now is not the time, Hux."

"I beg your pardon?" He questioned.

"It was real. The Supreme Leader fainted and gave us all a scare but he is fine now." She calmly spoke as you watched.

"Wonderful." Hux cleared his throat before looking over at you. "My apologies... Princess."

Eyeing him, you slowly nodded your head, watching him turn on his heel and stomp off. "I never liked him." One of the Knights spoke and you couldn't help but smile.

"If you'll excuse me, I'd like to be with my husband." With a small bow of your head, you turned and walked back inside.

"Shall we call her your highness? Or maybe empress Ren?" Another Knight spoke as Phasma shook her head. "Queen Ren?"

 

 

 

 

Kylo was kept in the med bay for a short period after you had left the group outside. Once the doctor had come back to confirm that Kylo was fine and nothing pointed to abnormalities, she let him leave.

And once you had, you returned to the ceremony, stating that Kylo was fine before the celebration continued on with a dinner held in the dining hall followed by the reception in the main hall. Sharing a few dances together, dessert, and glasses of wine, you two found yourselves standing off to a side.

Watching the nightly snow fall from the sky, Kylo had his arm wrapped around your waist, keeping you close. "We've come far." You spoke up, Kylo's cape draped over your shoulders. "Since the day we first met, long ago... till now."

"Mhm." He nodded, free hand resting against the balcony railing. "I never understood as to why you loved me so much."

Shaking your head, you sucked in a small breath. "What's there to understand? I loved you then, and I love you now." You shrugged as Kylo turned his head to kiss the top of your own before looking out at the stars. "I like to think that we are meant to be."

"Is that so?" He asked as you nodded. "Do you believe us to be soulmates?"

"Believe? I know it." You smiled, moving to wrap your own arm around his waist. "Soulmates are real, whether it's friendly or romantically."

"I truly hope we are romantically." Kylo teased as you nudged him with your hip. 

"I did just marry you. Twice." You reminded. "Although, this time around,  there is no ring to prove it." You lifted your left wrist to show the necklace-turned-bracelet.

"That's because nearly the entire base saw the wedding ceremony so they very well know that you are my wife... and I am your husband." Kylo said as you let out a small breath. 

"I guess that is true..." You trailed, then turned to look up at him. "I saw you were wearing the wedding band." You smiled up at him, grabbing his left hand and lifting it up as he watched you. "I wish I could wear mine..."

"You are, technically." He nodded.

Removing his glove and placing it on the railing behind you, you eyed the ring on his finger and smiled. "I'm glad that it at least fits you." Kissing the back of his hand as you kept your eyes on his, Kylo used his free hand to caress your cheek before holding it. 

Gazing at one another, the sound of the distant music was muffled as the fresh winds echoed around you. Kylo slid his hand underneath your hair before he leaned in and kissed you.

Holding his hand in your own, your other snaking around his waist and pressing against his back to bring him closer. Tip toeing to reach him better, you felt his hand slip from yours as it made its way around your hips and held on.

Leaning into you, bodies pressed together as he deepened the kiss, slipping his tongue past your lips as you let out a small mewl. Sliding his hands down to your waist, Kylo lifted you as you couldn't help but chuckle into the kiss. "Would you like for us to make our way to our chambers?"

Wrapping your arms around him, you leaned back enough and nodded. "As long as no one catches the Supreme Leader leaving his own wedding." You winked as Kylo smiled at you.

"I'd rather it just be you and I." Lifting you over his shoulder as you let out a faint grunt, Kylo made his way out of the balcony and on an alternate route to avoid the crowd in the main hall.

Dangling from his shoulder as you couldn't help but keep a smile on your face, lifting your wrist and eyeing the ring dangling from the chain, you felt heart flutter. You were sure the you that came to Starkiller II for the first time wouldn't have been this happy.

Waving his hand for the door to his chambers to open, Kylo walked in and settled you on the couch before he fell to his knees before you. "When do you want us to leave for our honeymoon?" You asked with a soft smile, running your fingers through his hair as he looked up at you. 

"As soon as possible..."

"So, tomorrow..." You smirked as he nodded, reaching his hands underneath your wedding gown and sliding them up and down your thighs.

"Mhm." Kylo hummed, hands moving hire up your thighs. "You've made me faint twice."

"Me?" You scoffed. "Your love for me made you faint." You arched an eyebrow.

"You are ultimate weakness..." Kylo mumbled as you smiled.

"Oh, the pity..." You teased, moving your hand to his chin. "I enjoy seeing you on your knees for me, Supreme Leader."

"My princess, you are the only one I'd kneel for." With a lick of his lips, Kylo lifted your gown and reached for your underwear, spending the rest of the evening at your will.


	33. Honeymoon (NSFW)

**Sitting** beside Kylo in the co-pilot seat, eyes in a daze as you gazed out the window before you, a smile grew on your face as you recognized the blue planet coming into view. Sucking in a breath, you leaned back in your seat before looking over at Kylo. "It's been so long since you were last on Calidum." You said as he had his focus out, towards the planet.

"The last time I was on Calidum, I left you behind because I never wanted you to be a part of the life I was soon to take." He lowly spoke, almost like a mutter as you let out a small sigh. "Yet, you found your way into it."

Eyeing him, you bit your inner lip. "You must be so happy." You spoke in a teasing tone.

"I am." Kylo nodded. "Because now I don't have the worry about someone who I believed to be more stronger than me. The fear of someone trying to use you as my weakness, to harm you, to kill you... is no longer existent."

Looking at him, studying his facial expressions, the way his jaw loosened up as his muscles relaxed, you reached over. "Even though we had forgotten about one another during that period of time... it always felt like something was missing." Placing your hand on his thigh, you smiled. "And, I was right."

Lowering his hand to hold onto your own, Kylo nodded. "We're about to land." He said as you tightened your grip around his hand. "All of that's happened between us then, the distance and separation, the way I treated you and what happened with Daniel... it's all in the past."

"I know." You nodded.

"This honeymoon will be worth it." He assured before lifting your hand to kiss it. "Our first vacation together. Technically."

Chuckling, you smiled. "Even though it's on my home planet... It's funny how everything always happens there." You pointed out. "I'm starting to think it isn't a coincidence."

Taking in a deep breath as he eyed the planet, Kylo lowly spoke. "Maybe it's not."

 

 

 

 

 **The** moment Kylo landed his shuttle on the designated spot in the hangar, you rushed down the ramp to be greeted by your little brother. "My little prince!" You exclaimed, holding him tightly in an embrace as you crouched, attacking his face with kisses.

"You're home! You looked so beautiful at your wedding!" He shrieked in excitement as you chuckled.

"Thank you so much, that means a lot to me." You softly spoke, smiling before you had let go of him. "I'm so happy you went with mother and father."

"I couldn't miss it!" He grinned before looking past you. "Your husband is so big and scary."

Following the direction he was looking in, you spotted Kylo standing there, patiently waiting, causing you to chuckle as you looked back at your brother. "He is big, but, he isn't scary."

"Really?" He nearly whispered. "He is the Supreme Leader... I guess it's good that he is scaring looking... He protects you that way!" He lifted a finger as you nodded.

"He does." You breathed, thinking about Kamino and Endor. "He's a good man to me."

"Well, if you say so, then I approve!" Your little brother nodded as you laughed.

"Your approval is all that matters." Kissing his forehead, you stood up and turned enough to gesture towards Kylo for him to join you. "Where is mother and father?" You asked, looking back at your brother.

"They're in a meeting but told me to tell you to enjoy yourselves... and that they'd see you at dinner!" He said, then lifting his focus and gasping. "Big, scary, and tall!"

Furrowing your eyebrows, you suddenly felt a hand on your lower back, looking over to see Kylo standing there, eyeing your little brother. "Hello, little prince." Kylo spoke as the little boy's eyes widened.

Sucking in a breath, your little brother straightened his back and crossed his arms behind him. "I approve of you and this marriage, but just you know if you hurt her, I will do something about it."

Smirking, Kylo crouched before him. "I appreciate your approval, little prince." He said. "And you have my promise that I will never hurt your sister."

"Hmph. I believe you." Your little brother nodded. "But don't forget!"

"I won't." Kylo shook his head before standing back up, placing his hand back on your lower back. "You will be a fine king, little prince."

"...Thank you, Mr. Ren." He nodded.

"Call me Kylo." Kylo said. "I grant you the right that no one else except your sister has."

Feeling a grin grow on his face, the little boy smiled. "Thank you, Kylo. I give you the right to call me Zakaree."

"Thank you, Zakaree."

Bowing his hand at Kylo, your little brother gave you a quick hug before stepping back and bowing his head. "Enjoy your stay, I'll see you for dinner." At that, he turned and left the hangar.

"He's sweet." Kylo said as you nodded, pulling his arm away from your back so you could hold his hand. "He very much loves you."

"Mhm." You smiled, guiding Kylo along with you as a droid went to deliver the luggage from the shuttle to your room. "He's got a very big and good heart on him."

"Very defensive, too." Kylo snickered as you nudged him with your hip. "I'm glad. I'm sure if I saw a man like me marrying my sister I'd be a bit defensive."

"He's just looking out for me." You shrugged.

Leaning over and kissing the top of your head, Kylo muttered against your hair. "Where would you like us to go first?"

"Hmm..." Tapping your chin, you then looked up at him. "The beach."

"The beach?" Kylo tilted his head. "I don't own any... swimwear."

"So?" You shook your head. "Go in your underwear. Or nude." You winked, causing Kylo to still in his spot but you tugged him with you.

"You're funny."

"Am I?" You looked over your shoulder. "We could go skinny dipping." Grinning at him, Kylo's eyes grew in size as you laughed. "Come on, live a little."

"You are a princess... you shouldn't—"

"I shouldn't sneak around and date a Jedi, but I did anyway." You said with a smile as Kylo sealed his mouth closed. "Hey, you don't have to get naked, you can just sit on the beach and watch me."

Blinking a few times, Kylo then thought about the idea of someone else seeing you. "No."

"No?" You tilted your head. “I can do as I please on my home planet, I’ll have you—“

"I'll join you." He voiced, catching you off guard as your frown turned into a smile. “I’ll do it.”

 

 

 

 

 **Making** your way along the beach finding the perfect spot, you slid your hand from Kylo's and began undressing. "You were serious?"

"Of course I was." You laughed, stepping out of your gown as it had bunched up around your ankles. "The water is so smooth and beautiful!"

"But... to be nude?" Kylo questioned as you unhooked your bra and tossed it at him with a laugh as he instantly caught it. "Princess, I—" Seeing your underwear fly his way, it collided with his face. Feeling his heart skip a beat as he lowered it, Kylo eyed your undergarments for a moment before looking up and seeing you rush into the water.

"Come on, Kylo! The water is perfect!" You called out, moving further into the deep end as you covered your chest with your arms before lowering your body. "You wouldn't want anyone else to see me... would you?" You asked, instantly seeing him remove his boots, causing you to grin.

Swiftly undressing, Kylo stood in his underwear, then looked over at you. "Does it have to go?"

"Unless you want them to be soaked when you redress..."

Huffing and cursing under his breath, Kylo slid off his underwear as you couldn't help but smile. "Unbelievable." He said as he covered his length with his hands, walking over to the water.

"Who are you hiding from? I've seen you naked a number of times, Kylo." You crossed your arms as he approached you, the water reaching his hips before you stood up to your full height and looked up at him. "See, the water is nice..."

"Hmm..." He hummed as he looked down at you with narrowed eyes.

"Don't look at me like that." You frowned.

"I'm naked. In the ocean." Kylo said as you nodded. "For you."

"Thank you." You softly smiled, reaching up and holding his cheeks. "I've always wanted this..."

"This?" He asked as you nodded.

"Bring you to the beach, just you and I." Bringing him down to your height, you kissed him, causing him to submit to your touch.

Snaking his arms around you, holding you close to him and pressing your body to his own. Kissing you back, moving his lips eagerly and passionately against your own, Kylo felt your fingers tangle within his hair and tug back as he bit on your bottom lip.

Moaning against the kiss, you smiled as you felt him kiss your bottom lip, then chin as he worked his way along your jaw and down your neck. "And you wanted to just sit around and watch."

"That's what you suggested—"

"And you almost went for it." You teased as Kylo grumbled against your skin, leaving more kisses, except they were followed by subtle bites and nibbles. He covered nearly every inch of your chest and neck with them, fingers digging into your flesh as your own stayed latched onto his hair.

Losing track of time as you got lost in one another, nearly forgetting where you were, you eventually found one another back on the beach, practically rolling in the sand as your lips never ceased to part.

That is until thunder was heard.

Lifting yourself from Kylo as you had been kissing his jawline, you looked up at the once sunny sky to see dark clouds rolling in. "Ahh, lovely. A Calidum storm."

"Then it's best we get inside." Kylo said as you nodded, standing up and patting as much sand away before helping one another redress.

Rushing over to the castle, the storm grew closer and stronger as winds picked up, light droplets leaving the sky and pelting against your skin. "I feel like a child once again!" You laughed as you and Kylo ran towards the structure.

"You'll feel even more like a child if it begins to rain!" He called out as you waved a hand, pulling Kylo underneath the roofing as the rain began to pour, missing either of you by mere seconds.

Panting, leaning your back against a pillar as Kylo leaned his hand just above your head, you shut your eyes for a moment as you listened to the rain fall. "It's such a lovely sound..."

Looking down at you, Kylo sucked in a deep breath before looking over at the rain, seeing the distant ocean and the gloomy sky above. He listened to the thunder as he then focused on your breathing, looking back at you and kissing your forehead. "It is."

Opening your eyes up, you gave him a sweet smile, grabbing his hand once again and walking him with you into the castle and towards your quarter.

The moment you entered your personal chambers, you unzipped your gown and felt it fall to your ankles as Kylo watched. Letting out a sigh as you eyed your room—one that nearly felt foreign to you—you realized not a single thing had changed. Everything was the same. Looking out the large windows that sat on either side of your bed, you watched the rain fall before shifting your focus to the hazed ocean.

Suddenly, Kylo's hands held your shoulders before they slid down your arms and shifted to your hips, causing you to shiver. "You miss it."

Leaning back into him, you smiled. "Not as much as I thought I would." You admitted, turning around to face him. "Although, Starkiller II is nowhere near as beautiful as Calidum—" You spoke in a matter-of-factor tone as Kylo sniggered, "it's home to me now."

"I'm sorry to disappoint." He sarcastically spoke before leaning in and kissing you, letting go of your hips before instantly picking you up in his arms as you chuckled. "At least we'll be here for a few days."

"Mhm." You nodded as he settled you down in your washroom, undressing himself before removing your undergarments.

Setting up a bath in your large tub, Kylo stepped on before you and helped you in as you sat beside him, resting against him. The window that sat beside you presented the raging storm as you listened to it and enjoyed the serene sounds of it. The two of you relaxed into one another for some time before you washed up, cleaned one another's hair and shared a few kisses.

Drying up and pulling on a robe, Kylo tied his towel around his waist before he pulled you with him to your bed. Lifting you and laying you at the center, he crawled on top of you as his lips collided with your own. Reaching up to hold his face, Kylo's hands wandered, slipping underneath your robe and lifting your knees.

Feeling his fingers trail along your inner thigh, they slid along your slit before rubbing at your clit, making your heart flutter. Slipping his index and middle into your entrance, Kylo pumped them within you as his thumb circled your nub. Squirming underneath him as you breathed against his lips, Kylo used the hand keeping him up to remove his towel, fingers leaving your warmth as you whined.

Looking up at him with a pout, Kylo undid your robe and opened it to reveal your nude form. Leaning in and kissing down the valley between your breasts, making his way down your stomach, your breath hitched as you felt his hot mouth against your folds. His lips sucked on your clit as your breath hitched, his tongue licking you up before they filled the void his fingers left behind.

Pressing his hands against your hips to keep you settled, Kylo savored the taste of you as you softly cried out his name, tugging on his hair and your sheets.

Wrapping your legs over his shoulders, reaching deeper into you, his tongue pulled out and assaulted your bundle of nerves as his fingers went back to pumping within you.

When you came the first time, Kylo went back to smothering your body with kisses before he sat you up with him and stettled you on him. He guided your hips before he thrusted right into you, making your breath hitch before you moved your own hips to meet his own at a quick and eager pace. Holding onto his shoulders as Kylo breathed against the skin of your chest, you came again and milked Kylo before the two of you rested breathlessly on your mattress and gazed up at your high ceiling.

"I think this is the first time we've made love in my chambers." You pointed out. "All the other times on Calidum were in the forest, on your ship, or even in some other place within the city..."

"There is that one time I was able to sneak into your room." He reminded.

"That was on the floor, though!" You chuckled.

"A big mistake but it was good." Kylo grinned as you shook your head. "Either way, we no longer have to sneak around. You are my wife now. And the galaxy will soon know it."

Rolling onto your side, you reached over and pulled him into a kiss. "I love you, moondust."


	34. Naberrie

**Just**  over eight months—nearly nine—had passed since your wedding on Starkiller II and honeymoon on Calidum. The news of the newly married Supreme Leader has spread throughout the galaxy like the stars in the night sky. Nearly everyone aware of the First Order now knew who you were, much more than those who had known you beforehand as a simple princess.

Your honeymoon was all that you could've asked for, simple and subtle. It was spent nearly like how the two of you were before Kylo had joined the First Order and left you behind to keep you safe. Except, of course, this time... there was no sneaking around. It was just the two of you, enjoying the beauty and warmth of your home planet.

Then, the big news had hit you a few weeks after your departure from Calidum and return to Starkiller II. With the symptoms that had fallen upon you and shined bright signals at you, you had visited the med bay to find out you had fallen pregnant. You couldn't say you were completely surprised—not with how you and Kylo were—but you still were. You were happy to know you were bringing life into the world. Although, you did have a few doubts with the galaxy you lived in, you knew your child would be fine under yours (and Kylo's) care.

After all, ever since his reunion with you, something within him snapped and made Kylo much more stable. He was on the path of becoming a great leader.

Of course... there was no easy way to tell Kylo. At the moment, you weren't entirely sure how he had felt about children. You knew he wasn't against the idea of heirs, but you didn't want him to have a child to just have a successor. You wanted him to love and care for them, to be there for them and to guide them along the way.

And when you had told him the big news that same day—a few hours later once he retired for the evening—there was a look in his eyes you had never seen on him before. A look that almost gestured how this was his life and you were truly his wife... and now you were giving him a child to call his own.

The months that passed were emotional and quite wild, the change in your body and all that you had been going through due to the pregnancy. It was a bit rough at first, but with the help of Kylo, Low, and even Phasma, you were able to get through it.

Standing before the crowd, with your protruding belly hidden underneath your gown, you listened to the words your husband had been reciting as you wore a smile. It was decided that they'd give you a proper position amongst the First Order rather than just being the  _Princess_  and the  _Supreme Leader's wife_ _—_ the Empress.

Since the First Order had never seen an Empress before, Kylo had written his own dialogue that he had read out loud for the officers and stormtroopers to hear. It had taken him some time, when it was a collective decision to title you with a higher authority, Kylo took it in himself to—in a sense—crown you.

"I present to you, for the very first time in First Order history, your new Empress." Kylo declared as the crowd saluted. Moving closer to you and pressing a hand on your lower back, you had smiled to those before you as you held your head high, hearing him mutter in your ear, "My Princess is now my Empress."

"Don't worry," You said with a wink as you placed your hand on your belly. "You'll have a new princess soon."  
  
  
  


 **Listening**  to the gentle sounds of music you were able to bring into Kylo's study—which he now named after you in your honor—you sat on a stool as you finished up a new painting. Both you and Kylo had filled the room up with new paintings and sheets upon sheets of letters and notes you both made with the calligraphy sets you had. What had been lost before was regained through new artworks. Kylo kept you as his muse, finding new ways to paint you each time as you did the same with him. Sometimes you'd paint one another as you painted together, other times you did it on your own.

And it was like this for the months you were pregnant.

Practically waddling into the study, your eyes landed on your husband as he was sat at his desk, a number of paintings surrounding him as his hunched figure was focused on something. "Shouldn't you be on the throne?" You teased, approaching him as you held your cloak together. 

"They don't need me on it every hour." Kylo insisted as you hummed, brushing your palms along his broad shoulders before pulling a chair over to sit beside him. "They know where to find me."

Taking your seat and looking at what he had been doing, you rested your head on his shoulder as he had been practicing calligraphy. "What are all these names?"

"Ideas." He nodded. "For our daughter."

"Names you have in mind?" You asked as he nodded. "They're all lovely."

"It's a mixture of fauna... some are names I've heard of throughout my life..." Kylo explained as you wrapped your arm around his waist. "Others are people I have known."

Scanning the list, your finger then hovered over one in particular. "I really love this one."

"You do?" He asked as you nodded with a smile. "It's quite beautiful."

"It's  _very_  beautiful." You corrected with a wink. "I think that's the winner."

"That was far too easy. Shouldn't naming a child be harder than that?" He asked, but you shook your head.

"Not when one holds a dear meaning to you." You softly spoke as Kylo nodded in agreement, turning his head to kiss the top of your own. "Let's go rest." You patted his hip before standing up.

"Isn't it a bit early?" Kylo narrowed his eyebrows, but you shrugged.

"Yes, but, I am pregnant and I do get sleepy very easily." You pointed out as Kylo let out a small  _ah_.

"Right..." Looking away from you to clean up his desk, Kylo then stood up and tucked his seat in, turning to see your hand sticking out for him to take.

"Maybe we can share a nice bath?" You suggested as Kylo's gloved hand engulfed your own, the two of you leaving the study, aiming for your shared quarters.

"Is that what you'd like?" Kylo asked as he looked over at you, seeing a mischievous grin on his lips that said it all.

"Possibly..." You winked as you looked up at him.

Smiling to himself, Kylo waved his hand for the door to open as you bowed your head as a thank you, walking in and waiting for the door to close before you removed your cloak. Watching you as Kylo had been removing his gloves and cape, he walked over to you and fell to his knees, carefully holding onto your round stomach and pressing his forehead against it. "I never would have thought the stars would've given me such beautiful gifts." He muttered as you looked down at him, raking your fingers through his hair.

"Gifts?" Twirling some of his hair, Kylo left a kiss against your belly before looking up.

"You, of course." He said as you smiled down at him, caressing the side of his face before holding his chin. "My Empress."

"Hmm..." Grinning, you brushed your thumb against his bottom lip before Kylo stood to his full height and held your cheeks. "You look so much happier than the day we were reunited."

"I was unaware of who you were, to be fair. I also... had a lot on my mind and I was selfish to put it on you." Kylo sighed, but you shook your head and held his wrists as either of you looked deeply into one another's eyes. "I am happy... happier than I've ever been."

Seeing Kylo smile, your heart leapt as you tiptoed to kiss him. " _That_  makes me happy, moondust."

Resting his forehead against your own, caressing your cheekbones with his thumbs, Kylo kissed the tip of your nose before he lowered his grip to your hands. "Let's give you that bath."

Smiling at him as he guided you along, he stopped you before him, quietly undressing you as you enjoyed the peacefulness of the humming air and Kylo's breathing. Once he had undressed you, he undressed himself, turning on the tub's water and helping you in before the two of relaxed into it.

Sitting opposite of one another, leaning your head back against the wall and taking in quiet breaths, Kylo eyed you. Gazing at your face, then lowering his focus to the gentle rise and fall of your chest, Kylo slightly smiled. Sitting up and leaning forward, he nuzzled his face against your own before breathing you in.

Stifling in a laugh as it rumbled within your chest, you kept your eyes closed as you wore a smile. "Did you miss me all day?" You teased.

"Possibly." Kylo grumbled, kissing your cheek, then down your neck.

"We did see one another for dinner..." You reminded, but Kylo huffed. "It isn't my fault the knights were eating dinner at the same time as well."

"I know..." He groaned. "I don't spend as much time with them as I should." Kissing down the column of your neck, he felt you run your finger along his spine.

"And what about me?" You asked, grinning.

Stopping his kisses, Kylo's forehead rested on your chest. "It's a good thing we live in the same chambers... huh?"

Chuckling, you opened your eyes and lifted his head. "I'm only pulling your leg." You winked before kissing him.

" _Haha_." He muttered against your lips, but you could feel the subtle smile on his own.

After spending some time washing up and relaxing, the two of you got out and dried up before changing into your nightwear and settling in bed. Resting on your side underneath the warm quilt, practically cuddling a pillow as Kylo had his arm draped over your stomach, you suddenly shifted in your spot.

Feeling your movements, Kylo woke up to the sound of you groaning. "Princess?"

"I think... I think you should start calling me empress..." You hissed as Kylo instantly sat up.

"Is she—"

"Mhm!" You slowly sat up with the help of Kylo. "My water hasn't broken yet... it's just the contractions." You sighed as Kylo pushed your hair away from your face.

"I'm going to request for the doctor." Kissing the side of your head and trying to keep his cool, not wanting to overthink the situation and rather keep his focus on you and only you, Kylo reached for his holopad and sent out the alert.

The alert not only went out to the doctor, but also the knights... and Phasma

The two of you had planned it all in advance, the knights would keep watch outside, the doctor would be on call and Kylo would be by your side. He made sure that he wouldn't take any missions around the time period you were estimated to go into labor.

"She had to come at night..." You shook your head with a small laugh.

"You're just dealing with contractions, for all we know she'll be born once dawn breaks." Kylo said as he went to sit beside you, you instantly slumping up against him and taking in his warmth. "Before you know it, she'll be in your arms."

Nodding your head, you shut your eyes for a moment. You took in deep breaths, focused on Kylo as well as the movement of your chest. "You're finally getting that heir you didn't really want but needed." You teased as Kylo hushed you, running his fingers through your hair.

"It's terrifying," Kylo admitted, "but I want her. I do. Just as much as I want you."  
  
  


 **Once**  the doctor had arrived and the crucial (and cruel) hours had passed, after all the yelling and crying had been put to rest, you sat there coated in your sweat with a smile on your face as your baby girl was handed to you. "What an angel..." You breathed, eyeing her as she slightly squirmed in your arms, adjusting to the new world around her. Kylo hovered beside you, eyeing his newborn daughter, caught in a trance as he gazed down at her.

"Have you decided on a name?" The doctor asked, the words entering one of Kylo's ears and leaving the other. There was something about her, something about the Force that surrounded her that was nothing like his own. There was a hint of sensitivity, he felt it... but there was something more.

Smiling down at your daughter, the way her eyes wondered curiously before settling on you, your heart fluttered at the sight of such brightness held within them. The feeling of pure happiness and love seeping from her. "Naberrie." You nodded. "Naberrie Ren."

"That's a beautiful name." The doctor spoke. "I'll let you two be for a bit with your baby girl." With a smile, she left the two of you be before leaving the room.

Lifting your focus from Naberrie, your eyes landed on Kylo. He was deep in thought, staring down at your daughter. You weren't sure how to read him, there was a mix of emotions. Looking back down at your little girl, you saw her focus had settled on her father, the two staring at one another. Then, your heart skipped a beat. A small smile had grown on her little face. Her first smile. "Stars..." You nearly whispered, turning your focus back to Kylo and seeing his eyes had rounded. "Would you like to hold her?"

Gulping, Kylo snapped out of his trance and looked over at you, quietly nodding. Watching as you handed over little Naberrie, he reached out to grab onto her, feeling his chest tighten. "She's so small..."

"She's a baby." You chuckled, fixing her small hat. "She looks like you."

"Hardly..." He muttered but you shook your head.

"She  _does_." You insisted.

"A far cuter version, I'm sure." Kylo spoke in a hushed tone, refusing to look away from his daughter as she gazed up at him. "Naberrie Ren..." Looking deeply into her eyes, Kylo took in a deep breath. She was nothing like him. Not an ounce of darkness was felt, nothing but pure love and happiness. And light.


	35. Dawn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello my lovely readers! I cant believe this story that I’ve been working on since the early summer is reaching its end! I’ve had so much fun putting together and I had to honestly stop myself from making a mini series just on the future of the kids and kylo + reader. I truly hope you all have enjoyed this little fic journey and I hope you stick around! I’ve always got some new ideas up my sleeves (;

**Raising** Naberrie was easier than you could've ever expected. Especially when Kylo refused to let her go. Since the moment he first held her, it was almost as if there was an instant link created between the two of them. He wanted to be around her, wanted to care for her, and you were more than thankful for that. You knew she wasn't planned and you weren't sure how Kylo truly felt about having children, but seeing her constantly in his arms, you knew he loved her as much as he loved you.

"Moondust!" You called out, but received no response. "Kylo?" Searching your shared chambers, looking int the bedroom, Naberrie's crib and even your bed, you sighed. "Kylo!" Shaking your head, you left your private quarters and searched the halls before aiming for the study. Hearing babbling, you smiled, walking inside and seeing Kylo sitting there, back facing you. "Finally..."

Looking over, Kylo turned in his spot as you walked over, outstretching your arms as Naberrie smiled up at you and eagerly bounced on her fathers lap. "At this point, you should expect that I have her with me."

"I do expect that." You said, reaching for Naberrie and lifting her in your arms. "You know, she has two parents. Not just one." You arched an eyebrow as Kylo shrugged, making you laugh. "You're awful."

"What? I'm only teaching her my ways." Kylo defended as he stood up, caressing the back of his daughters head. "Someone must teach her how to be the greatest successor—"

Tapping his shin with your foot, you shook your head. "Oh, stop that, she's a baby." Looking down at her, you nuzzled your nose against her own as she giggled, reaching up with one hand to pat your cheek. "What did you do today with your daddy?" You asked with a childish voice as she smiled at you, babbling and waving her hands around. 

"She got to sit on the throne." Kylo translated.

"You sat on the throne? All by yourself? What a big girl!" You said in awe as Naberrie bounced in your arm.

"She and her wookiee toy were babbling demands to the knights, asking for them to smile more." Kylo explained as you chuckled, looking at him.

"Is that so?" You laughed. "I wish I had seen that..."

Wrapping his arm around your waist and turning you with him as the two of you aimed for the study's door, Kylo kissed the side of your head. "I can show you right now?"

"Now? But haven't the knights retired for the evening?" You asked as the two of you walked at a steady pace along the hallway, your daughter fiddling with your necklace, amazed by its shine.

"Yes, but, you can just see our little princess sit on her future throne. See how small she is compared to it." Kylo insisted. "Believe me, if I could, I'd let her rule instead. She looks perfect on the throne."

"If only babies could rule." You teased, looking up at him and winking. "I'm sure she wouldn't be as harsh as you, though."

"I... am not harsh."

Looking at him, you squinted your eyes. "You sure?"

Sucking in a deep breath, Kylo kept quiet as he walked beside you, his hand pressed on your lower back. He knew he was harsh, he couldn't be a Supreme Leader without it... "Am I harsh to you?" He quietly asked and you couldn't help but hold in a smile.

"Only when we reunited." You nudged him as he groaned, Naberrie now resting her head on your shoulder, embracing your warmth. "Someone's cold..."

Waving his hand for the throne room doors to open, Kylo lead the way before he reached for his daughter, kissing her head and settling her on the throne. "Look at her... I'm so proud..."

Sitting on the seat, nibbling on the wookiee toy, Naberrie smiled up at you and flailed her arms. "Oh, my little princess! You're so precious! So small compared to the throne!" You gawked, kneeling before her and poking her belly. "I think you look better on the throne than your daddy"

"Hey." Kylo glared at you but you waved a hand dismissively, twirling some of Naberrie's soft curls around your finger. "We both look just as good on the throne."

Grinning, you leaned in and kissed her puffy cheeks, nuzzling your nose against her own as she smiled up at you. "Okay, that's fair enough, moondust." Standing up, you looked down at your daughter, in her cute skirt, onesie underneath, and little coat to top it off.

Seeing her yawn, Kylo removed his cape, lifting Naberrie and wrapping her in it. Her little head sticking out as her eyes fluttered, sleep overcoming her as he kissed her forehead. "My little princess." He said, holding her in his arm as she wavered.

"She's going to do great things when she grows up, hmm?" You peaked over and eyed your daughter, watching her eyes fall close as she rested against her fathers shoulder. "I can feel it."

 

 

 

 

 **Eight** years had passed since Naberrie was born, an energetic, ball of fire. She was hard to keep still, always on her feet and wanting do something—whether it's to join her father on missions or to join you in meetings—Naberrie was always active. She was smarter than you expected an eight year old to be, the things she would say and do catching you by surprise. You were so proud of her, by the way she handled situations no one thought an eight year old would.

"Naberrie, honey!" You called out, walking along the halls of the palace, as you held the hand of your two your old son.

Yes, you and Kylo were surprised by yet another child to add to the Ren name. Kai wasn't like his sister when she was two years old, she was the one to run around, disappear and be found with the knights or the troopers who were on duty. You always found her trying to "blend in," mocking whoever was before her. Whether it would be marching or standing stiff at a door—or even saluting Phasma (who very much enjoyed Naberrie's enthusiasm)—she was always fooling around.

Kai, on the other hand, was a bit shyer. He liked being by yours or Kylo's side, always patient and quiet, doing as told. Most of the time, he was with you, "helping" you out as he always offered to. But, just like his sister, there was a blinding brightness of light within him as well and Kylo couldn't seem to understand why his children ended up such way.

But, he was grateful. He didn't want them suffering from the imbalance he had, he was glad they were one sided rather than wavering like he had. They had stability, especially with the help of you and... himself.

"Where is she?" You asked, looking down at Kai.

"Knight?" He tilted his head as you lifted your eyebrows.

"Hmm... I never thought of that. You're such a smart boy, Kai!" Seeing him blush, you leaned down and kissed his cheek before walking with him to the training room.

Seeing the doors open, you then spotted Naberrie amongst the knights, training with them. "Berrie..." You spoke up as all the knights stood straight and bowed their heads, you acknowledging them before looking back at your daughter.

"Yes, mama?" She smiled as you shook your head.

"What did I say about running off without telling me?" You asked.

"I know, mama. I'm sorry." She dropped her head but you smiled.

"It's okay, sunshine, your father wants to see us." You waved a hand, your daughter saying goodbye to the knights as they all bowed their heads to her before she rushed to your side and grabbed your free hand.

Walking in between your children, over to the throne room, the two troopers watching over opened the doors as you walked in, Kai slipping from your grip and rushing to his father before Naberrie did the same. "Hello, little ones."

Watching as he greeted his children, kissing their heads and letting them sit on either of his laps, you smiled.

"Papa, I was training with the knights!" Naberrie said in excitement.

"Is that so, my Berrie?" He asked as she nodded eagerly. "Did you kick their behinds?"

"Of course!" She scoffed as you chuckled. "They taught me a few things... and I used the Force!"

"That's good, little princess. I'm proud." Kylo said, leaning in and kissing her forehead before looking over at Kai. "What about my little prince?"

"Mama take me to snow!" He smiled. "I made angel!"

"Really?" Kylo asked as Kai giggled and nodded. "Did you make snowballs?"

"Yeh! Mama help!" Kai grinned. "I make... man with dada's... light..."

"Lightsaber?" Kylo tilted his head.

"Life saver!" Kai nodded.

Smiling, Kylo leaned in. "Say it with me: light-saber."

"Light... Saber." Kai repeated.

"There you go, little prince." Kylo nodded, kissing his son's forehead.

Stepping forward, you walked up the steps and stood before Kylo. "What is it that you wanted to see us for?"

Sucking in a breath, Kylo nodded. "I would like for us to take... a family vacation."

"Oh?" You lifted your eyebrows. "Where to?"

Looking at you, Kylo smiled. "Bespin, Endor, Naboo... Maybe Calidum..."

"Maybe?" You arched an eyebrow as Kylo sighed.

"And Calidum." Kylo corrected himself as you grinned.

"Well? What are we waiting for, then?"

 

 

 

 **Just** like your trip all those years ago, you visited Bespin first—Tatooine not being an ideal family spot. Lando was more than happy to see his "grandnephew and niece" and let you and Kylo have some free time as he watched over the two. Kylo didn't keep his children a secret from the man he considered an uncle, he at least wanted his kids to have some family in his end.

Then, it came to Endor and neither of the kids wanted to leave. They enjoyed the company of the Ewoks and all the adventures they took them on. And—to your surprise—Kylo had taken Naberrie and Kai exploring. Endor wasn't entirely new to them—especially not Naberrie. She claimed it to be one of her favorite planets ever. And nothing was better than the sight of your husband, two kids, and a bunch of Ewoks dancing together. Even if Kylo was quite stiff, you joined him so he'd loosen up.

Stargazing was how you ended your nights, with Naberrie and Kai resting in between you and Kylo, falling asleep there and then, you always had a smile on your face... which rubbed off on Kylo. Just the sight of your little ones, cuddled up and fast asleep, made your heart swell up.

Naboo, on the other hand, was spent all day with the Naberrie's—which Naberrie, herself, enjoyed the most. She was always fascinated by the fact that her name came from them, and whenever Pooja would tell the story about how you and Kylo got married there, your daughter would always light up.

Finally, Calidum was your last stop.

"Don't go too deep!" You called out to Naberrie as she had been swimming nearby Kylo, you on the shorelines with Kai as he had been playing with the sand. "What are you making, my little comet?"

"Dada ship!" He nodded, in his little swimming shorts with his hands all covered in sand. "I make ship!"

"Oh, do you need help?" You asked, leaning in.

"I okay! Thank you!" He smiled up at you before returning back to his little creation.

"What do you see?" Kylo asked Naberrie as she had been wearing goggles.

"Pretty fish!" She shrieked. "Did you and mama do this?"

"Swim around?" He asked as Naberrie nodded. "Sometimes..." Thinking about when you had gone in nude the first time the two of you travelled together, Kylo gulped.

"I can't wait til Kai can join us!" She said in excitement. "Then he can see all the pretty creatures with me!"

"He will, soon." Kylo nodded. "Come, let's get back to shore, I'm sure you're hungry."

"Mhm!" Swimming towards her father, Naberrie and Kylo made their way back to you before Kylo sat beside Kai and watched him build.

After spending a few more hours out there, having lunch and enjoying the water a bit more, you made your way back to the palace and cleaned up. When dinner was served, Naberrie sat with her grandparents and told them all about her adventures as you sat with Kylo and fed Kai. Afterwards, you walked the grounds with Kylo as Kai stayed with your mother.

"I never thought we'd make it to this point. You and I, married, with two children." You said as you held his hand. "The Force works in wondrous ways..."

"It does." Kylo nodded, lifting your hand and kissing the back of it. "I'm very happy with how far we've made it. Unexpected... but my life seems to be that way constantly."

"Well, this unexpected outcome is a good one." You nodded with a smile. "I just can't wait to see where the Force will lead our children."

"A much better route." He nodded. "A much lighter one."

Evening turned into night, and the night was slowly bleeding into the day. Dusk was turning into dawn and Naberrie slipped out of her parents bed, rushing towards the balcony window to watch the sun rise.

"Berrie?" Looking over and seeing her little brother, Naberrie walked towards him and grabbed his hand. "What you doing?"

"Watching the sun rise! Wanna watch with me?"

"Okay." He nodded, rubbing his eyes.

Making their way down the steps of the balcony, towards the terrace, they stood there together and looked out to the horizon of the ocean as the sun began to lift into the sky. A beautiful hue of colors radiating off of them as they smiled at the sight.

Behind them, two figures stood: a young man beside an older one as they glowed in blue. Both were proud, overlooking their bloodline. 

Then, one by one, more figures appeared behind them and eyed them with the same looks, proud and hopeful.

"They're the ones." The younger one spoke. "They will do what's right."

"Yes," The older one nodded. "They will."

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Thank you for reading! Comments + Kudos are much appreciated, and you can find me on Tumblr as damndriver!


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